Touchstone
by Gin2
Summary: Chapter 14 now up! Hermione has lost everything she ever had. But has she given up? Does she have someone who doesn't even know they have her? Short little story about overcoming one's losses and seeing that there is a light to every tunnel.
1. Blooming hope

Touchstone  
  
By Gin  
  
Disclaimer: Rowling owns them, and I play with them.oh yes. I only hurt them if they ask, I swear. =D  
  
A/N: This is my first shot at this kiddos, let me know stuff.  
"Good morning Miss Granger."  
  
Severus Snape stood nervously beside the bed staring down at the silent and slightly bruised figure lying unmoving. The sunlight was just starting to creep in when he had awoken with a stiff neck. He had rings around his eyes, and for him, he was pale- he was exhausted. And he was at a loss. Talk to her they said. About what? What do you say to an unresponsive person lying in, as far as they knew, a coma? First of all, he didn't just talk to people. And second, what possible good could he do? He made her this way, it was his fault she was like this, why on earth would she listen to him..  
  
****  
  
"NOO!!!"  
  
"Get back you stupid little mudblood!"  
  
*FLASH!!!* Green light lit up the room and a harsh gasp was heard as the body of Ron Weasley collapsed on the floor.  
  
"Hermione! Move!"  
  
"Harry no!" Harry Potter shoved a shocked Hermione out of the way as she desperately grabbed for her fallen friend. He shot off curses at the man, no, he was past that, at the thing that was Lord Voldemort. Severus closed his eyes as his former student had his life taken and stood silently in the shadows hidden, waiting for the right time to strike. As far as everyone knew, he was dead. No need to give it away so soon. Damn Weasley! Why did he have to play the valiant hero now?!....  
  
****  
  
He had sat at her bedside as long as she had been there. Teachers came and went to relieve him, at his orders of course. He was determined to be there when she awoke. He felt responsible. He had to let her know what had happened. Snape was knocked out of his reverie as a polite cough was heard from behind. He whirled to see a grave looking Albus Dumbledore in the doorway. Snape knew the man was old, even if he liked to pretend he wasn't, but.over the past few months Albus, his hero, had aged more than what should be allowed life. He stood still and waited for the Headmaster to speak.  
  
"Thank you Severus for staying with her last night again. I've just spoken to Poppy. She doesn't know quite what to do; she says Hermione has energy levels higher than that of normal catatonic patients, but still no response. It's as if she's..locked herself up inside her mind. And I've no doubt you understand the seriousness of that." The Headmaster sighed and looked sympathetically at the younger man and cast his glance downwards before approaching the bed himself. Snape knew what the outcome could be. If the girl was already in that state, it would take nothing short of a miracle to bring her out of it..and he was afraid he knew no miracles, just as he didn't for his brother all those years ago. Snape also looked at the ground. He was tired. Gods was he tired. He had slept barely a wink since that night. What was it two nights ago? Three? He had lost count, but he didn't care anymore. He was numb; everyone was. The lives lost during the last stand against Voldemort had been tremendous, but they had won. He had seen people he knew, cared for even, die. Old students, Seamus Finnegan, Blaise Zabinni, contrary to popular opinion, Blaise was not a Death Eater, she was on the side of the Light, had always been, and she was a good woman, countless old acquaintances, Filius Flitwick. Losing Filius had been a blow to the whole school. Severus was actually quite fond of the tiny Charms teacher. He had fought bravely beside Dumbledore and lost his life. They all did. And yet he was alive, and standing next to a most likely lost and brilliant girl.  
  
Dumbledore placed his wrinkled hand over Hermione's and stared. "She did not wake any last night I take it?" his eyes searching Severus'.  
  
"No." Snape's face was blank and he looked back at the girl on the bed. "I see." Dumbledore's eyes shone bright, but this time not his normal twinkle. If one ever wanted to know how Albus Dumbledore was feeling, all one need to do is look at his eyes. Normally twinkling, they were now silent. Instead they filled with tears as he gazed upon his tragic former student. "We haven't much time for her Severus. I'm afraid.." He trailed off. Hermione Granger was one of the most brilliant students Hogwarts had ever seen and she had always held a particular spot in his heart. Moments later Dumbledore straightened his back and looked at his broken friend standing on the other side of the hospital bed. "There may be one chance Severus...and since, you could be possibly connected-"  
  
"Albus no! I can't! Nothing I could ever do would help. Why would it?" Snape sunk back down into the uncomfortable chair he had been using as his bed for the past few nights. Waiting. He couldn't go inside her and see more pain, he couldn't take it. He'd had all he would endure for the last time. He raised a trembling hand and pinched the bridge of his nose. Another headache. Lovely.  
  
Albus watched him. "Have you slept?" He eyed Snape worriedly.  
  
"What do you think?" Snape sighed and began to massage his temples.  
  
"Perhaps you should go to your rooms, eat something, try to get some rest and recover. See if you might reconsider. It could be our only hope. It can't hurt." He walked over to Snape and placed a warm hand on his shoulder. "We need you Severus. Please, don't give up. I can't bear it- "he bit off his sentence and straightened. Snape closed his eyes. 'Gods, why me?' He opened them and looked at Hermione. He owed it to her to at least try to bring her back, although it might be kinder to let her go. But was it his decision? Snape slowly got up with one last tired glance at Hermione and left the room wandering down to his room in the dungeons to think. 


	2. Connection

Disclaimer: Rowling owns them, I make them do things. Plot, as far as I know, is mine though. Yeeaaah.  
  
A/N: Due to well, people asking me, I'll continue with this. Thanks for all the reviews I got when I woke up. Ah. Things like that are nice. Thank you again! Whoo!  
  
**** The teapot was hissing and Snape took it off the fire, wincing as he burned his hand on the hot metal. Dumbledore said he might be connected with her. 'Surely not.' His presence couldn't have been strong enough to link him with her. Interesting. But of course he would have to take responsibility with this! And of course Albus would look to him to fix this! Never mind the fact that it was obvious the girl was preparing herself for death, and never mind the fact that he would be the one who, if successful, would be the one to see her like that. 'Yes,' he thought, 'I'm pouting. I've earned it.' He poured his cup of tea and sat down on one of his surprisingly comfortable arm chairs in front of the fire. 'Well, I do need sleep if I'm to actually go through with this.' He took a sip of his tea. He loved tea. And making it the "old-fashioned" way was so much better than conjuring it up. It always calmed him down, if calm was to be had.  
  
****  
  
"Harry Potter! You come to finally meet your death..." The high-pitched raspy voice rang out in the room. Severus held his ground hidden just behind the doorway.  
  
"Crucio!" The curse was directed at Hermione and she screamed and convulsed under it while Voldemort laughed. Harry fought against the chains that held him to the wall.  
  
"Leave her alone you bastard!" Tears stung his eyes as he watched his best friend writhe in pain when a dark figure snuck into the room. Voldemort's wand twitched effectively cutting off the curse on Hermione. She lay exhausted and spasming on the ground.  
  
"Oh Harry, I am going to enjoy this.."  
  
****  
  
Snape blinked and let out the breath he didn't realize he had been holding. He just wanted to forget about that night. What if he could save Hermione? She has nothing left to come back to. She'd just go right back to her death bed and it would all be over. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. Long ago he had promised the Headmaster he would not take his life, but that was before Voldemort had been destroyed. Sure, there were a few stray Death Eaters to be hunted down, but the Ministry could handle them. It would be so easy, to just let go. Be free. Freedom. Did he ever know what that was? Maybe there was a time when he knew what it was to be truly free when he was younger. That is, until his brother died. His parents never forgave him. It really hadn't been his fault, but over time he had come to agree with his parents. Maybe Hermione has it all figured out. Death is the only freedom. But only after he sorted this current situation out that was waiting for him in the hospital wing. Then perhaps his debts would be paid and he would leave. Forever.  
  
Snape got up and walked into his bedroom scowling. He shrugged out of his robes and slipped into bed nude. He couldn't sleep otherwise else the tangled sheets would claim his life as he tossed and turned. As he lay in bed he wondered what it would be like to go inside another's mind. It was a rare thing, not easily done, it required powerful magic indeed. He yawned and gazed out the window at the stars, which was a favorite pastime of his. His eyelids were drooping just as he felt a soft thump at the bottom of his bed. 'That blasted feline!' he though. Hermione's familiar had taken up residence with him when his Mistress didn't return. Harry, Ron and Hermione had come up to the castle for the final battle and she had brought her pet with her. But since that fateful night, the cat was determined to stay with Snape. He remembered how different they were when they first arrived than to that of their school age selves. Obviously they had grown up; they had graduated four years earlier. Each had been successful: Harry being The Boy Who Lived, had taken a job as an auror with the Ministry and was predictably successful. 'Big surprise there,' he though sarcastically. Ron Weasley had taken a job in a Magical Innovations department for professional Quidditch and was a leading authority on racing brooms. While Hermione had became the youngest department head at the Ministry's Research and Development office in London ever. He had definitely noticed Hermione. She had certainly grown up and in more ways than one. He knew it was inappropriate to have noticed, but as Filius Flitwick had mentioned, before he died, in one of their late evening chats, he'd have to be a blind man to not have noticed. They were so young, and full of promise if not a bit tarnished from the world. The war had nicked away at everyone. And now look at them; they were all in at least some way destroyed. Sensing the man's distress, the cat slinked up the bed to nuzzle Severus' face. He reminded the feline of his Mistress. Snape didn't mind. It was actually soothing and soon was lulled into sleep by the feline's deep and rhythmic purrs.  
  
Snape awoke with the gray of dawn after a fretful night's sleep. Not that he'd expect anything less, but at least he got a few hours in. He stretched and looked down at the orange mass of fur under one of his pillows. "Blasted feline." He reached across and affectionately scratched the top of the ginger cat's head and was rewarded with a purr. He crossed the room to go into the bathroom and take a quick shower and then ate some breakfast. Dry toast and coffee, black. He had a feeling his nerves would not allow for more. He then changed into his customary black school robes and made his way to the infirmary where, unsurprisingly, Dumbledore was already waiting.  
  
"Ah Severus. Come in my friend. I trust you had a good night's rest?" Dumbledore smiled at Snape's grumbled response.  
  
"As good as can be anticipated." Snape peered over the older man's shoulder at Hermione lying motionless as ever on the bed. "Nothing?" his eyes held a brief flicker of hope but the bleak look in Albus' face told him his answer. "Well then, I have no choice but to comply with your wishes. What would you have me do?"  
  
"You always have a choice Severus," the Headmaster locked his eyes with Severus'. "As I said before, I believe due to the traumatic experience you and Miss Granger shared linked you before she slipped away. I also believe using the Communis Spell could possibly join you two inside her consciousness. Can you handle this Severus?"  
  
Snape paused before giving his answer. This would be tough, not to mention it would drain a considerable amount of energy, mainly from him. But, he had a chance to at least *try* to save one more person unselfishly before he himself left this world. And with that final thought he squared his shoulders and answered, "Yes. I can. What must I do?"  
  
Poppy Pomfrey, the mediwitch on staff at Hogwarts stood by watching nervously, as did Minerva McGonagall the Deputy Headmistress. As Severus took hold of Hermione's hands Dumbledore began a complex incantation that moments later Snape himself joined in. Snape began to feel light headed as the spell wove itself into his mind and body. He slowly sank into a nearby chair careful not to lose his train of thought or his grip on Hermione's hands. His body started to tingle and his vision blurred as the spell took effect. Then, everything was black.  
  
He was in the middle of a very white room. Well, it could be a room but there were no walls. He felt very much disoriented as he waited for his mind and vision to clear and he slowly stood up and looked around the space- there was no Hermione. 'Oh Gods..I know I am not lost in a hidden part of Hermione's conscious..' Suddenly the whiteness of the room took on a golden glow and objects became clearer. A large oriental style rug covered the floor, a couple of wingback chairs sat facing an enormous marble fireplace- complete with burning flames, and perpendicular to the fireplace stood an elaborate bookshelf filled to the brim..and a door, but still no Hermione. The light in the room was faint, and retained its golden hue as Snape made his way over the abstract sitting room. Just as he was sitting down into one of the large chairs he heard a weak voice.  
  
"Hello?" Hermione appeared in the doorway. She looked ghastly. Her complexion was pale, her eyes waxy and her hair unkempt. Her clothes looked rumpled and she was alive- but just barely. The disheveled girl braced herself against the door jamb and looked quizzically at her guest. She had a feeling she knew this man, but could not quite place it. Snape abruptly stood at stared at Hermione. It had worked.  
  
"Ah, how are you feeling Miss Granger?" he took a step towards her but stopped as she tensed. A full minute went by and he thought this was all just one big mistake and then she answered.  
  
"Well, I have been better," her face was impassive and her eyes were dull. She was living death in itself. "If you don't mind my asking..who are you?"  
********  
  
Evil little cliffhanger eh? Thanks to all who responded, it means a lot to me. Seriously, reviews are wholly welcomed. Thanks to my Shan love for the Latin. 


	3. In the Dark

~*~*~*~  
  
Dumbledore's idea that Severus and Hermione were linked was correct. He was now inside of her conscious mind and had made contact with her. There was one problem however, among others he supposed. She did not know who he was. His mind raced thinking what that could mean, wondering if she was so far gone she had forgotten everything about her life. 'Well for the gods' sake man, tell her who you are before you scare her off!' Snape arched a delicate eyebrow, his trademark, in confusion. He blinked, tried to gather his thoughts, and replied. "Ah, hello." 'Excellent greeting Severus,' he thought after the words were out.  
  
Hermione continued to watch her visitor warily. Snape cleared his throat, "My name is Severus Snape." Judging by her lost look she did not recall the name so he continued. "I was your Potions professor at Hogwarts?" Nothing.  
  
"We fought together in the war?" Her gaze faltered.  
  
'Ah,' he thought. 'That struck a chord.' "I suppose you are wondering why I am here Miss Granger," he watched her reaction. There wasn't one. "Or, at least *how* I got here?"  
  
After a beat she replied, "It has crossed my mind."  
  
Snape laughed inwardly at the irony of that statement. 'Now what.'  
  
"From the apparent fact that you do not remember who I am, it has occurred to me that you may not retain all of your memories. Can you tell me what exactly it is you do remember?" He shifted uneasily on his feet. The girl looked as though she was trembling and she continued to stay silent.  
  
"Miss Granger," he softened his tone a bit, "I can assure you I mean you no harm, otherwise I would not be here. You and I are linked; that is why I am able to be standing before you," he even gave her a small smile.  
  
Hermione had not thought about that. All she knew was that a familiar and desperate presence had been nagging at the back of her mind, asking for permission to come in. Feeling weak and distracted she allowed the presence to enter. She had watched him in her mind's eye, and feeling no immediate danger approached the stranger. He said she knew him and the longer she thought about it, the more she seemed to remember.  
  
She was terrified of him when she was younger. She remembered detentions and other horrid punishments. Only, he looked a bit different.the facial expression, was that.concern? It certainly wasn't a look she recognized from that man. And of course he couldn't hurt her, well physically at least. Realization slowly dawned on her and she took a feeble step towards the Potions Master.  
  
"Hello Professor S-snape."  
  
"Do you remember now?" Snape winced at his rhetoric question.  
  
"Yes. It is slowly sinking back in," her face remained impassive.  
  
Snape took another step towards her. "Would you like to have a seat? Excuse my unnecessary insight, but you look a bit time worn," he stopped his advancement as she shook her head vigorously. He sighed.  
  
"Alright. Would you care to tell me why you're here Miss Granger?" He opted for a firmer tone; it usually produced better results than what he was getting at the moment.  
  
Hermione started at that. "Perhaps you should begin telling me why you're here Professor Snape. This is my mind in the first place." She was getting tired again, this discussion was draining and her trembles doubled.  
  
"Very well. Out there," he motioned at the vast space around them, "there are.concerns, particularly about your health. Dumbledore- you do know who that is right?"  
  
She nodded. "He said, ah, that I may be able to reach you; consequently here I am."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Snape bit his tongue. 'Impertinent little. patience Severus.' He took a calming breath, "To try and persuade you to come back of course. That is, if you want to come back. He seems to think you would be better there than here."  
  
Hermione blinked, was that a joke? This just gets weirder and weirder.  
  
Her knees felt weak, and with as much dignity as she could muster she took a small step backwards to clumsily lean against the doorjamb. "I'm perfectly satisfied where I am now thank you. I appreciate your concer- "she inhaled.  
  
Images were floating back to her mind. The ones she had been keeping at bay since her little retreat. Dark wizards.blood and death.death. 'Oh my God.' Her bottom lip trembled and her knees gave way. "Oh, Ron." she whispered as the tears welled up and she slipped down the doorway.  
  
Snape crossed the distance between them in three strides and grabbed her before she sunk to the floor. Hermione flinched violently and raised her arms in defense so he wrapped his arms around her tightly to keep them from flailing about. Her breath was ragged as she tried to banish the awful sights. Poke them back into their hiding space. Snape held her as she gained her composure. He wondered if she had dealt with everything, but was assuming she hadn't. This would undeniably be a delicate situation indeed. He'd have to tread lightly if he was going to convince her that there was a reason for her to come back.  
  
Snape gently rocked her back and forth and whispered soothing words in her ear. Words that surprised even him. He stroked her hair, remembering that when he was little the same actions used to calm him. But those affections didn't last long. Hermione eventually relaxed and let herself be held. Denial. Denial was bliss. How odd that such a strange and generally unappealing man could provide her with solace.  
  
After what seemed like a good ten minutes Snape spoke up. "Miss Gra- may I call you Hermione?" She inclined her head. His silky baritone voice vibrated inside her chest.  
  
"Thank you. Hermione, might I suggest we move to more, er, comfortable positions?" he said having sensed her lessened tension.  
  
She nodded and he helped her to stand wrapping an unexpectedly strong arm around her waist and guided her to one of the large wingbacks. Having her situated, he slid his own chair so that it was directly in her line of vision, and sat down as well. They sat in an awkward silence.  
  
"I don't suppose there is any chance of getting some tea?"  
  
Hermione glanced at him. "I suppose not then." He sighed. "Well then, I am still in need of a response Miss Granger, "he was using his most formal tones to try to bring her out of her silence. "Will you not come back?"  
  
Hermione's face remained blank as she looked at the fire, "I'd rather not."  
  
"Fair enough. May I enquire as to why?"  
  
"I don't- that is, I don't feel a need to," she whispered.  
  
He snorted, "That seems rather selfish."  
  
Hermione's eyes flashed. "You're one to talk!"  
  
"Oh really," he sneered. 'Provoke her,' he thought.  
  
"Yes! You-"'No.best to forget. Close off Hermione." Snape watched her expression change from fury to nothing.  
  
"Well, regardless of your opinion of me, my opinion of you is that you are still selfish. And deciding to stay in here and hide, while hurting others outside is not changing that fact. You cannot stay in here and sulk forever Miss Granger."  
  
She looked up at him, her evident plan clear as day on her face. "I don't plan on it."  
  
Snape paused, and then rose to stand. "I don't believe you. You don't have it in you."  
  
"Try me," her voice was fierce and her eyes narrowed. 'How dare he antagonize me?!'  
  
"I will." He bent down and leant near her face, his nose mere inches from her own. "You see Miss Granger, I believe that if you were serious, you would not have waited this long."  
  
He went a bit further to whisper in her ear, his voice low and dangerous. "I think you are just looking for an excuse to come back. You want someone to fret over you, maybe force you back. Now tell me that is not selfish." He lingered for a few seconds before rising, his breath in her ear.  
  
Hermione's chest was heaving with rage. He stood back and looked at her; she was staring at the fire, the light dancing on her cheeks. He stared hard at her for a few moments daring her mentally to reply. Having decided to end this meeting while he was still ahead he took a step back. "Hermione, I know you do not want to do this. And in spite of my general view on Gryffindors, I would think you would be much braver than this." He shook his head, gave her a disapproving sneer and left, leaving Hermione to ponder.  
~*~*~*~  
  
This is so much fun! I'm glad everyone is enjoying it! Thanks to Luna Writer, All4DaEstrada, SotMoon, maridale3, rosemerta, PeachyKeen, and hpdigigal, Stellar Snape, SteelMagnolia80, El Mann and carpe diem.  
  
Also, thank you sooo much to my betas Kel, Lenea, Gam and Coren! You are a goddesses/god respectively. Heh. Also thanks to Shan for her lovely opinions.  
  
**Also, quick note, uh, I've read so many many wonderful fics over the past few months, and it has struck me that my words could be subconsciously influenced by certain aspects from others' works. I don't think I have recreated anything that would offend some authors, but if you feel I have taken something you feel is yours, please do not hesitate to tell me and I will give recognition where is it rightfully due. Merci! 


	4. Musings

Disclaimer: Not mine. J.K. Rowling's. Sounds like Bowling. I just learned that today. Hm.  
  
A/N: **This chapter is a slower chapter just showing Severus. He's tired, overwhelmed and deals with it in his own way. I think he could act this way when he knows no one else is watching.  
  
Touchstone By Gin Chapter Four  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Snape sat up with a gasp as he returned to his own mind. He paused to gather his wits and looked around. Dumbledore was sitting in a chair on the other side of Hermione's bed anxiously looking at Snape; Madame Pomfrey was fussing about him taking his vitals and whatnot; Minerva was pale and watching them.  
  
"Poppy! I am quite alright." Snape wrenched his arm out of her grip and looked at Hermione's still form. "Well, as you've no doubt surmised, 'I made contact.'" he said sarcastically.  
  
"And?" replied McGonagall nervously. She looked at Hermione and became worried. Snape, too, looked at Hermione again.  
  
"Well, it appears she did not follow." Dumbledore's face dropped. Snape tried to exhale some of his tension. "I do not think she will any time soon either. I'm sorry. I did my best." He got up out of his chair, his knees objecting. He idly wondered how long he'd been there. "I may be able to go back however. I think she is just..trying to decide. But I don't think she wants to give up. Not yet anyway." Sad looks were shared among the staff members present. Snape departed and stalked down to his own portion of the castle.  
  
The hallways were stuffy and warm. They always were during the daytime in the summer at Hogwarts. It was the middle of June and the heat was almost unbearable. Snape figured it must be sometime around noon judging by the grumbling in his stomach. The cooler temperatures in the dungeons were just what he wanted right now. 'That and a stiff drink.' He had a nice bottle of whiskey waiting for him in his rooms right after lunch. He reached the hidden door to his rooms, only he and designated others could see. He murmured the password - Specula - and with a wry smile strode through the door. He peeled off the outer layer of his robes, and hung them on the rack by the door and shrugged out of his shoes. His get-up-and-go had been thoroughly depleted and he wanted nothing more than to relax in his rooms to think in peace. He summoned a house-elf and shortly afterwards was having a simple meal of sandwiches and iced pumpkin juice. Not his favourite drink, but he was in the mood for it right now.  
  
'Gods, she had looked awful.' Snape replayed that morning's affair and frowned. He had never seen her in such a state. Granted, she had enough reason to be, but even still it was not a kind image. Absently he felt a small warm body slithering about his feet while he ate at his table. He knew it was his intuitive foster-pet and tried to shoo him away with his foot. When Snape finished he banished the dishes to the kitchens and made for the desk in his room. He bent down to a low drawer and pulled out a 2/3 full bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhisky. Not his most expensive brand, but it did the job. He conjured up a tumbler and set it on the nearby side table. Next he unbuttoned the top buttons of his white linen shirt, collapsed tiredly in the squashy armchair in front of the large fireplace and poured whiskey into the glass to near full. He took a gulp and tried to focus on the burning of his throat as the hot liquid made its way down. It usually was so good at taking his mind off his problems.  
  
Tonight would be a long night. He sighed and stared into his glass. His newly acquired feline, conversely, was growing restless and impatient and paced back and forth between Snape's feet. His questioning mewing soon turned to a near growl before Snape brought his attention to the animal. 'He really is quite attentive isn't he?' Snape moved his glass away from his lap to allow access for the cat to jump into it, which he did. The ginger tomcat sat and stared up into Snape's eyes. He knew he had been with his Mistress- he could smell her scent. And yet she was still gone. The cat's burning glare lessened and he reached up to nuzzle Snape's neck. Severus was sure it was the cat's universal sign for reassuring his humans. He wondered if he also did this with Hermione. Moreover, he wondered if her familiar would have recognized his owner. No doubt he would. Snape scratched the pet's head and replied, "Sorry little friend. She's not here. Give me some time." Apparently satisfied the cat turned in a circle, trying to find the best way to sleep in his lap, and curled up into a ball.  
  
Snape resumed his consumption of alcohol throughout the night. He wondered whether or not she would let him in tomorrow. Should he continue being strict or soften up a bit? Perhaps he should check to see if Potter had made any progress. Snape frowned, 'The cocky little prat,' he thought. Harry had had a rather complicated and new spell cast upon him repeatedly, almost rendering him completely insane. Snape had heard about it in one of his last Death Eater meetings, but had not had enough knowledge about it when Potter was attacked. Of course, with the spell and the torture, the future looked dim. For three days he had rocked himself back and forth and murmured nonsense and screamed as if in pain. He would shy away from any attention and turn in on himself. Snape had not been to see him, as he had been watching over Hermione, but Sirius had come to tell him how he was doing. Snape had to comfort Sirius while the man wept at Hermione's bedside. It was then Snape fully realized that Black had lost almost everything himself. This world was so cruel. 'Just look at what the world did to the Wonder-Trio of Hogwarts- not so wonderful anymore,' he thought with a sad smirk. He shook his head as he realized he was getting sentimental.  
  
When Snape had refilled his glass and gone over his ruminations the mantel clock quietly, yet not distastefully, chimed three am. It always astonished him how long he could sit in self-pity without even realizing it. His vision was slightly hazy as he stood up wobbly, knocking a protesting Crookshanks off his lap, and made his way to the bedroom. He unbuttoned his shirt and trousers, carelessly dropped them on the floor and clumsily tore open the covers. As he slid up the bed, he slowly slipped out of his boxers and tossed them aside. The air was chilly in his bedroom, (he had left his window open and the dungeons were known to intermittently significantly lower the temperatures even in the summer), and he pulled the covers just up under his chin, like a child. He loved the feel of the deep green satin sheets against his skin. The cat pounced on the bed and settled between the pillows and promptly fell asleep. 'Oh to be a cat', Snape laughed quietly to himself.  
  
He gazed out his window again tonight and listened to the deep purrs by his ear. Tomorrow he would owl his old friend from University. He was an expert in psychological charms, and find out how he was coming along with Potter's cure, if there was one. Then he would go back for round two with Hermione.  
  
"Please..please Hermione, don't give in. Not yet." And with that the alcohol took control and Snape blacked out.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Snape awoke in the morning with a splitting headache and a dry mouth. "Ugh." He groaned and rolled over and would have crushed the cat had he not issued a warning growl. Snape drug his naked self to the bathroom to down a vile of anti-hangover potion he kept fully stocked. He smacked his lips in disgust and turned towards his shower. The hot steam billowed out from the shower curtains as Snape slipped in. That was one thing he loved that about Hogwarts, no matter what time of the day, or night, there was always hot water. He lathered his skin and washed his hair- it wasn't greasy liked the students thought, but very fine and shiny. Besides, he used an Appearance Detracting Charm during term time to add to his bogus façade.  
  
Once finished with his shower, he dried off, dressed in black slacks and a black linen shirt with green serpents sewed on the tip of the collars and grabbed some parchment and a quill. He quickly scribbled out a letter to his old friend asking about Harry, and went up to the Owlery. He chose a medium sized barn owl and walked it over, owl perched on his arm, to the window and sent him off. He watched the bird get smaller and smaller and leant against the cool stones. It was a lovely morning so far with just a slight breeze; quite the contrast to the mood inside that of the castle. Having done his good deed, he turned away and made his retreat back to the dungeons only to be intercepted by Albus and Minerva.  
  
"Ah Severus! Minerva and myself were just on our way to breakfast. You haven't joined us in quite some time, do come along?" The Headmaster gave Snape a hopeful look and Minerva smiled encouragingly. He noted she looked rather tired. Knowing a trap when he saw one, he obliged and followed them into the Great Hall.  
  
The enchanted ceiling showed the bright clear morning sky as he made his way to the High Table along with the other staff. Professor Sprout sent him a worried look as she took in his appearance. He could just tell she was thinking 'He's lost weight.' Snape scowled at her without feeling and stared at the food. He wasn't that hungry and he didn't get much sleep. He just wanted to get back to Hermione and try again. Poppy Pomfrey also took in Shape's tired form.  
  
"Severus, you look terrible. I will force you to take some Sleeping Draught if you do not start sleeping, "she scolded.  
  
"I do sleep thank you," he snapped. 'Just not well.' He piled on some eggs, bacon and a croissant and poked at them. He was really getting sick and tired of everyone caring about him. A moment later the coffee was handed down to him and he filled his cup, added two sugars, and drank gratefully. Minerva watched him out of the corner of her eye and when he went back to staring at his breakfast she sniffed disapprovingly. Snape sat his fork down with a clatter and glared at her.  
  
"Had I known this is the kind of welcome I would have received upon joining everyone, I would have spared myself the torment." Minerva returned his glare.  
  
"Don't look at me like that. If you do not wanted to be worried about then do something to change it. It will do you no good to starve yourself either without food or sleep."  
  
He was too tired to argue. "I ate plenty last night," but he took a bite of his eggs all the same. Then he remembered Minerva's own abnormal appearance and added, "What about you? The pot calling the kettle black I'd say. When was the last time you had a decent night's sleep?"  
  
She gave him a rueful smile. "I was sitting in with Hermione last night," seeing his worried look she quickly added, "Quiet. You served your watch and you needed your rest. Besides, no one expected you to stay there all night after what you did yesterday."  
  
The rest of the meal was eaten in quiet as he contemplated his next visit with Hermione. Or, rather, Hermione's mind. Having finished, he got up and made for the infirmary. The halls were still cool but he hurried through them nonetheless. He walked into the room and over to the curtained-off bed. He started when he noticed he was slightly out of breath. He wondered if he would have enough strength to do the spell as he looked down at her lying in the bed.  
  
She was in the same position as the last time he'd seen her. The morning light was on her face and she looked so peaceful. He watched her silently for a few moments before Poppy and Dumbledore quietly entered. They could see him staring at her and each wondered what was going through his mind. Poppy tactfully clucked her tongue and strode over to the window and opened it.  
  
"We need some fresh air I think," she said then went through her cabinets and found a vile of Pepper-Up Potion and handed it to Snape. "Drink," she said forcefully. "You need some strength, at least to get through this properly. I'll not have you pass out from fatigue while you are under this spell Severus." She stood, arms crossed, in front of him until he swallowed it in one go. He scowled at her while he drank.  
  
Dumbledore grinned and then turned to the matter at hand. "Are you sure you are up to this, my boy?"  
  
Snape winced at the endearment nodded his head, "Let's just get on with it shall we?" He took hold of Hermione's hands and waited for his cue to join in on the incantation. The familiar light-headed dizzy feeling set in and he let it come.  
~*~*~*~  
  
Thank you again for the reviews! You guys are so nice. =D More to come, I promise. Specula means "Ray of hope" in Latin, thank you Shan love. A bit of irony yes? Lenea, Kel, Gam and Coren. I love you. 


	5. A Flash of Memories

Disclaimer: Not mine. J.K. Rowling's.  
  
A/N: Sorry, my creative juices are running low, been a busy week and a half. Thank you for sticking with me whomever you are.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
He held his eyes closed while he waited for the light to dim. When he opened them, the room was just starting to come into focus again just like the last time. It looked the same, but this time he decided to head over to the bookshelf while he waited for Hermione to enter. He wondered what her mind would fill a bookcase with. He ran his delicate fingers over the leather bound edges and glanced at the titles. Almost all of them were familiar. There was an especially nice section of Muggle poetry. Muggles were really the better poets; wizards just didn't invest enough time in literature. She had collections of Byron, Tennyson, and Arnold to name a few. He reached out to a compilation of poems by Arnold when he heard her shuffle into the room. Her appearance had most definitely not improved since their last meeting. He stiffened and moved towards her.  
  
"Professor."  
  
"Miss Granger." Her breathing was strained, but she tried to conceal it. He motioned for the chairs and she slowly made her way over. He patiently waited, diverting his attention so as not to make her even more uncomfortable in her awkwardness, but kept her in the corner of his eye. When she made it to the chair, her knees gave out and she caught her breath. He noticed a thin layer of perspiration across her forehead. Her very life force was slowly ebbing away, it worried him. He needed to move fast.  
  
"How are you feeling today?" He sat down next to her, scooting his chair close. 'Invade her space.'  
  
She met his gaze, "I don't. Why do you think I'm here?" He met it back coolly and imperceptibly nodded.  
  
"Have you thought any on what I said yesterday?"  
  
"Yesterday..." Her gaze lowered as she thought. "I'm sorry, I lose track of time." She paused for a moment. Snape kept his eyes on her. "I did. Now may I ask you a question?" Snape inclined his head. "Why do you keep coming back? I have made my decision-"  
  
"Then why did you let me in?" he asked sardonically.  
  
"Because I wanted to tell you, so you could tell them..whoever 'them' is." She closed her eyes and leaned back into the chair.  
  
Snape sighed exasperated. "Hermione-"  
  
"No," she said quietly. "There is nothing. Nothing to go back to, don't you see? I. Can't. Take. More. Pain!" Her chin wobbled. "I just can't. I'm so tired. I just want to go..can you understand?"  
  
He stood up and paced back and forth. 'Like a frustrated lion' she thought, 'how ironic.' "Miss Granger, have you been living in a cave for the past decade?" She blinked. "You don't-"'Talk about the pot calling the kettle black indeed..' "Miss Granger, I have had nothing for longer than your life. And yet look at me. I have not given up and shamefully banished myself into my own recesses." 'Yet.' She continued to stare. He stopped and looked at her. "You do have something to live for."  
  
"Like what!?! They're all dead!" Her eyes widened at that recognition and she quickly closed them. 'Don't think about it, don't think about it, don't think about it...'  
  
He watched her, so much pain. She needed to know at least this. "No. Not everyone," he said quietly. Her eyes snapped open. "Harry.. isn't dead." Her lips parted in shock. He wouldn't say anymore. Not yet. He felt awful. Gods, looking at her made him depressed. The fact that another human was capable of feeling like him was frightening to him. He wanted to comfort her and he didn't know why. It wasn't his place, he had no feelings for her that he could recall, but seeing her in that state made his heart squeeze painfully. "You..haven't lost everything. You have yourself, you can feel. You have a brilliant mind, and a promising career to go back to, Hermione you could be anything you want. You mustn't do this. Besides, Albus is counting on you returning; as is the rest of the staff. And, you have to go back to Harry. He will assuredly need you." He watched her expression.  
  
She sat still hugging her arms to herself. "Harry is...but I thought-"  
  
"Just barely."  
  
"Oh. How bad?" Snape wouldn't meet her eyes this time. "But he's not going to make it either is he." It was more a statement than a question. The terrifying images were again hovering just outside of comprehension. She shook her head. "I can't," a tear slipped down her cheek.  
  
Snape strode over to her chair and knelt down, his hand over her arm squeezing. "You can. You have to," his eyes bore into hers. Hermione stiffened.  
  
"No!! Here! This is what I can't go back to!" Her eyes blazed and the room grew black. The fire died and there was nothing but black. She started rocking back and forth. "If I go back, then they come!" There was a deep rumbling sound somewhere. She raised her hands to her face and shook her head fighting it off. "They're there....always lingering," she gasped. "They never let me rest. I can hear them.."her lips trembled. "I can hear them screaming for me..I can see them die, oh.."  
  
Suddenly there was light on the hidden walls. And images. Memories. He heard Hermione whimper and looked around. The ceiling and walls played like a film from an unseen projector. There was a cozy house. Hermione was there with her parents. Then there was a blast at the front door and her mother screamed. Snape felt a warm shivering body pressed against him and he wrapped his arms around her and watched. Above him wizards in dark robes and white masks trooped in and bound them all to walls. Her father yelled, her mother shrieked. Hermione was crying desperate pleas. The Death Eaters began torturing her father and then turned their sick attentions to her mother. Hermione was forced to watch as they raped and hurt (another word for hurt, not torture) her parents in their living room. Blood was flowing freely from her parents' mangled bodies as large magic induced gashes and bruises appeared from nowhere. There limp bodies were being moved around like a macabre puppet show and she watched the light go out of their eyes. She screamed helplessly, begging for mercy when they turned towards her laughing mirthlessly. Faceless men touched and cursed her.  
  
'Crucio! You will obey us you little mudblood bitch!' Behind him, on the other wall shouts were heard as Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and a few other aurors barged in and hexes and curses flew everywhere.  
  
The rumbling increased as the next memory became visible. Hermione sneaking around an old house. A man screaming... Snape recognized it as his own voice. Hermione's breath was ragged as she tried to quietly invade the residence. She stealthily crept throughout the house and to the room where Snape was being tortured. Malfoy and his new recuits were there cursing Snape. Like a flash, Hermione cast stupefy repeatedly and somehow avoided being hit herself. Lucius had hidden behind the table Snape lay on dazedly and reached for something tapped it and vanished. She rushed up to Snape and ran her fingers over his face gently. Then she closed his wounds, sent up a locating charm for the aurors nearby to take the remaining Death Eaters and Apparated them to safety.  
  
The rumbling sound grew even louder still, as did Hermione's trembles. More images appeared on the wall in front of him and he held her in the dark. Dumbledore was there telling Snape and other members of the Order of the Phoenix this would be the last battle. Hermione stared heartlessly at the Headmaster and nodded. Then all of the walls displayed images of scenes going on all around him. The field where the sides of good and evil had met. There were angry jets of sparks swirling around them and Snape ducked a couple of times, shielding Hermione as best he could. People were falling like stones everywhere. Screams and then a bright light, just over a hill. Dumbledore and his followers were emerging. They pointed they're wands at their enemies and set to work, killing the dark minions.  
  
Beside Hermione's image Fred Weasley was killed and she and George dropped to his side. George cried out and with renewed hatred fiercely attacked every Death Eater in sight. Behind her, Neville caught a bad curse and sank to his knees cringing in pain. Hermione then caught a hex in her shoulder jerking her around. Crabbe and Goyle were advancing on her with their wands out. Her left arm hung limply at her side. An intense look of pure hate blazed from her eyes as she cast Avada Kedavra; it just missed Goyle. Then Crabbe reached into his robes and pulled something out, she couldn't make out what it was before Goyle seized her, but not after a well placed engorging charm. He cried out, and Crabbe grabbed him and tapped the object in his hand. The next image was of her in a cold and damp dungeon. Malfoy senior and Voldemort were there. 'Oh yes...we can use her,' the Dark Lord sneered. 'Place her over there,' Voldemort dismissed them and slowly walked over to her. 'Now you will see how your futile devotion to that old fool has failed you..' Soon afterwards Harry and Ron appeared, Snape knew it was from a locating charm they had placed on her before, that's how he found Potter et. al as well. Ron dove for Hermione, shielding her and Harry aimed his wand at Voldemort. However, Malfoy quickly spelled out some chains and Harry fell against their force. Ron with a last glance at his best friends yelled "Avada Ke-"  
  
"NOO!!!" Hermione yelled and tried to pull Ron away.  
  
"Get back you stupid little mudblood!" Voldemort flicked his hands and Hermione went flying into the wall.  
  
*FLASH!!!* Green light lit up the room and a harsh gasp was heard as the body of Ron Weasley collapsed on the floor.  
  
"Hermione! Move!"  
  
"Harry no!" Harry Potter stood up against the chains and shoved a shocked Hermione out of the way as she desperately grabbed for her fallen friend. He shot off curses at Malfoy and Voldemort again flicked his wrists and Harry was sailing back hitting the stone wall with a crack. His head lolled about and he tried to look up. Hermione was frozen in place, Ron was lying dead on the ground near her feet.  
  
"Harry Potter! You come to finally meet your death..." The high-pitched raspy voice rang out in the room.  
  
"Crucio!" The curse was directed at Hermione and she screamed and convulsed under it while Voldemort laughed. Harry fought against the chains that held him to the wall.  
  
"Leave her alone you bastard!" Tears stung his eyes as he watched his best friend writhe in pain when a dark figure snuck into the room. Voldemort's wand twitched effectively cutting off the curse on Hermione. She lay exhausted and spasming on the ground.  
  
"Oh Harry, I am going to enjoy this..You have no idea the kind of strain I have been experiencing while waiting for you." He edged closer. "But I think I've waited patiently." Severus clung to back wall of the room in the shadows waiting. Malfoy had his wand trained on Hermione and was trembling with anticipation.  
  
Voldemort raised his wand and trailed it along Harry's cheek. Harry screamed in pain. He pointed it back at Harry grinning with his serpentine mouth. "Alienomentum," he hissed. Hermione watched in horror as Harry's head twitched and his eyes bulged. Then it stopped. Voldemort and Malfoy laughed. Then Voldemort motioned to Lucius and he put Hermione under Cruciatus again as Voldemort continued ravaging Harry's mind.  
  
Then Snape emerged. "Avada Kedavra!" he bellowed pointing his wand at Malfoy and easily killing him. Malfoy's lifeless face registering shock more than pain. Then Voldemort turned. Harry hung limp against the wall.  
  
"Severus! My lost little snake...how appropriate that you join us tonight." Snape cautiously moved around Voldemort, wand out drawing his attention away from the now moving body of Harry Potter.  
  
"Yes. I rather had hoped to see you die, once and for all." Snape ducked out of the way to Hermione's twitching body as Harry Potter raised his arms and focused all his remaining energy on Voldemort, and shouted "AVADA KEDAVRA!!!" The familiar green light exploded from Harry Potter's body as the Killing Curse was hurled at Voldemort. The Dark Lord screamed and hissed...and fell on the ground. His reign of terror was now over.  
  
Hermione raised her head weakly as Snape rushed over to Harry's side. She watched him as she checked over the younger man. It suddenly grew very cold in Hermione's conscious.  
  
"Harry?" Snape felt for a pulse and took him off the wall. He quickly checked for a pulse again. "Harry?! No.NO! Harry!" Then the memories faded to black as Hermione gave up...  
  
The rumbling had disappeared, the lights slowly came back to their original golden hue and Snape registered tears on his neck and Hermione shaking violently. He wrapped his arms tighter around her and mentally tried to calm himself down. 'Merlin..that was different..' It wasn't that the images were anything new to him, Merlin knew how many atrocious "activities" he'd been forced to endure; but seeing them through Hermione's eyes, and almost feeling her own pain had gotten to him. His mind suddenly recalled the gentle touch she'd given him when she'd found him that night. She really was a strong person to have gone through what she had, right up until the end..  
  
He held her as she calmed down. It bothered him that she wouldn't let it all out. Maybe she couldn't in here. He had to get her out. He stroked her cheek and tilted her chin up to his face. "Hermione.." She finally met his eyes with her own tear-filled ones. She turned her face away from his and made to get up- she was so weak. Snape then felt a nagging sensation in his body and looked at Hermione, she was pushing him away.  
  
She turned back to him and said, "You need to leave..I need to go for now." He looked at her worriedly.  
  
"What does that mean?" No response. "Will I be able to come back tomorrow?" he hoped he didn't sound as anxious to her as he did to himself. Gods, he felt weak. She gave a wan smile and closed her eyes. Snape felt himself slowly wake back in his chair in the hospital wing, panting for air, and still holding Hermione's hands. He felt his eyes gloss over with tears, and he slowly leant on the bed and then there was nothing.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: WOW! That was an exhausting chapter. You people better enjoy. More to come though.  
  
Thanks to everyone who replied!! Also thanks to my betas: Kel, Gam, Lenea, Coren, and Shan for the Latin again. Such cool people have I.  
  
Also, Alienomentum means "to cause person to go out of one's mind" in Latin. 


	6. Worries and Wonderings

Disclaimer: Not mine. J.K. Rowling's.  
  
~Touchstone~ Chapter Six  
  
By Gin  
Snape woke with a start. His neck and back were sore so he stretched and took notice of where he was. Still in the hospital wing. He remembered why he was there and looked down at Hermione's body and took her hands in his. They were still warm; 'I must have been holding them the entire time,' he thought. He looked down at her pale face and then glanced out the window- it was dark outside. His eyes felt gritty, and he felt so drained.  
  
For the life of him he could not understand why he had been so affected by her. Each night he had felt a weight growing heavier and heavier and only intensified when he was "with" her. And every night he wondered why he thought about her so much, and dreamt about her. They really must be connected. But, it was almost.more. That look she gave him in Malfoy's estate, it was almost tender, and caring. He raised his hand to his cheek where she had touched his face and gazed thoughtfully at Hermione for a moment. Then he blinked and shook his head cutting off any further train of thought. He sneered, 'Well damn her anyways. If she wants to be selfish and make others miserable then so be it. Maybe it's better she leaves after all.'  
  
But she had leaned into him while the memories had been playing. 'She did that because she needed strength. Surely she wants to come back then.' Frowning he paused to think about that. He sighed. 'So why won't she?!' he thought angrily. He was so frustrated. And if he was this tired, she must be nearly dead. He shuddered. He would go back tomorrow; he would definitely need to brew a powerful Fulcio potion tonight if he was going to make it through next time. If he did make it through..  
  
Snape got up, stretched his limbs again, gave Hermione a wistful look, then sneered again, and made his way back to the dungeons. He needed to brew that potion now so it would be ready for in the morning. The walk to his personal lab was taking forever. He hadn't remembered it ever taking so long, but luckily there were a couple of students in the halls he found an excuse to deduct House points from, so it made the trudge a bit better. When he entered his rooms he went straight to his lab through a door on the right.  
  
He selected a cauldron and gathered his materials from his storeroom. He could do this with his eyes closed. Although he wouldn't. Snape reached for the cutting boards and began to meticulously chop his ingredients into tiny, equal bits. His fingers deftly moving with the blade, each stroke perfect. Then he set the fire to the correct temperature and carefully measured out powdered unicorn horn into the cauldron. Brewing had always relaxed him, and he also enjoyed it. So many people took potions for granted. It truly was an art. 'Eight counter-clockwise stirs.' his mind was automatically re-calling the procedure. He could have gone to Poppy for the concoction (he'd made her an ample supply that was still usable) but he needed the distraction.  
  
'And why am I so distracted by her? True, she saved my life, but I've repaid the debt. I do feel sympathy for her, but why does it bother me so?' he thought warily. He had somewhat gotten to know her in the days before the war. Well, maybe not as she normally was as the death of her parents and her own rape had dulled her spirit, but she appeared to be moving past it. There were more important issues at hand. He had come to admire her wit and intelligence. She was no longer the hand-waving Gryffindor Know-It-All that had so agitated him while she was in school. She had matured into an agreeable young woman. She had even helped him with brewing a potion just last week before the last battle. However, judging from Potter and Weasley's reactions, she had apparently been acting very distant at that time. True, she did have a more stony appearance to her facade, but that had been expected. However he never pushed her. He would have listened to her if she felt she wanted to talk, but he left it up to her and chose to, at times, work in companionable silence.  
  
One day he noticed her constantly looking at his personal library and offered to let her peruse it. He saw a small spark light up in her eyes before it was dimmed, and she made her way delicately over to the bookshelves. He found it amusing watching her eyes widen at some of his personal favorites- who would have ever thought the formidable Potions master would like Muggle poetry?  
  
Snape lowered the flames under the cauldron. All that was left was to let the bright green liquid simmer over night. He then extinguished the lights in the lab, and proceeded to his living quarters through a door on the left side of the room. He was too tired to drink tonight and he imagined it would do him no good anyway. So instead he made his way to his bedroom but was stopped by a very hungry cat.  
  
Snape bent to pick up the animal and scratch his head. "Sorry, I was preoccupied." The feline croaked in acknowledgement and nuzzled Severus' face encouragingly. He set the animal down and he twined through Snape's legs impatiently. Any other time this would have agitated Severus but tonight he was just too weary. He poured the cat's food into the heavy porcelain bowl (He went all out for the cat, even if it was temporary, or at least he hoped temporary for Hermione's sake.) and filled the other with fresh water. The cat appearing satisfied with this arrangement left Snape alone to eat.  
  
Then Snape wandered over to his bedroom and just barely made it out of his clothes before he collapsed. It bothered him to feel so weak and vulnerable. He lay in bed, luxuriating in the feel of the cool satin against his skin, and almost fell asleep before he remembered the lights were still on. He frowned and gracefully lifted his arm, and with a quick movement extinguished the flames as he felt his live-in pounce up onto the bed and fell asleep thinking of her again.  
  
*~*~*~  
  
Hermione sat in complete darkness. It was getting harder to breathe. Today's little episode had just about done her in. She absentmindedly thought the episode wasn't really 'little' though. What was more perplexing than anything else was Snape. He almost seemed.put out when she made him leave earlier; how curious.  
  
The pain was threatening to invade her senses again and that caused her to wrap her arms about herself. She was so cold. She had been forced to re-live the violence again today, but as long as she was in here the feelings could not completely overwhelm her. She had briefly considered just staying in here, a permanent coma. All she wanted to do was read her books, stare at her fire and not have a care in the world. She quickly discovered the insanity of being torn between two worlds soon enough. She could barely rest because the visions were constantly clouding her mind. The pain was a small tick in her chest that tightened with each passing day, minute, even breath. She could not have absolute peace no matter how hard she tried.  
  
'And yet when Snape was there..' She shook her head. No.when he was there she felt more at ease almost. She had gotten to see past his defenses a small bit the days preceding the war, but only a small bit. They had neither the time, nor her willpower to get to know each other. 'Plus, how ridiculous would it be if they were to have a.. something.'  
  
Hermione closed her eyes. Tonight she had planned on letting go. She really had. She was a Gryffindor. They did what they said they would didn't they?! However, that was before Snape mentioned that Harry was alive. 'Oh Harry.' she sighed. But he hadn't been clear as to exactly what his state was. For all she knew Harry could be in the same condition as she. She wanted to laugh at that. 'The Wonder-Trio.ha!'  
  
Faintly she could hear her mother screaming again and Hermione began to rock back and forth. She tried to focus on something else. Unbidden the image of Snape came to her. He was sleeping, or at least she thought he was sleeping. He was covered in satin sheets but appeared to be.nude? She could see his pale arms and lean back poking out of the sheets. But just as soon as the image came it was gone. Frustrated she tried to think how or why that had just happened.  
  
"You and I are linked; that is why I am able to be standing before you.." Didn't Snape tell her that earlier? How?  
  
Hermione tried to think how they could be conceivably linked without magic involved. 'However, there was magic all around us, and we were all in highly traumatic emotional states.it could have been possible.' Hermione almost grinned.  
  
The image of Ron's death flashed before her eyes and she cried out. She huddled deeper into herself as she heard screams from unseen people all around her. She couldn't take much more of this..  
  
*~*~*~  
  
Albus Dumbledore left the Great Hall before anyone else that morning after breakfast. He had watched Severus for an hour while he was under the Communis Spell before leaving him to Poppy's care the day before. She had made him leave too. Like Severus, he also was showing the signs of stress and wariness, and Poppy Pomfrey had made him promise to go take a nap. Albus chuckled at the remembrance of her order.  
  
He quietly made his way down to the dungeons. It was 9:45 by the time he made it to Severus' door and let himself in. Albus had always been the only one to breach the heavily warded doorway; a talent that constantly agitated the quick-tempered Potions master. He glanced around the entryway and living rooms. No sign of the younger man. So the Headmaster made his way to the laboratory. He noticed a softly simmering potion and went to inspect. Almost as soon as he approached the cauldron the flames went out. 'Severus must have charmed it to turn off at a certain time' the elder man deduced. He then exited the room and went in the direction of the bedroom. However the sound of Hermione's pet made him look down. The cat was obviously hinting at the other man to be quiet. The Headmaster smiled and stooped over to pet the feline, which vaulted in to the touch and purred.  
  
He then noticed that the door to Severus' room was open- a very un-Snapish thing to do, but since the cat was obviously not distressed he calmly entered the bedchamber. Severus was still soundly asleep. The Headmaster silently thanked whichever deity was responsible and quietly sank into the chair by Snape's small fireplace and watched the younger man. He had noticed the weight Severus had lost, as well as the purple smudges under his eyes. The boy had never been a good sleeper, but lately this fact had clearly made itself known. Of course, being under the Communis Spell could not be helping matters any. The Headmaster was worried about his Potions master. He knew that he had been increasingly distancing himself from everyone. Naturally Severus was not a sociable man, but he made his appearances from time to time to let everyone know he was alive. And though Severus would never admit it; Albus knew he missed the faculty's busy-body company after extended periods of time away. He smiled at that thought.  
  
But the fact that this time he hadn't been making his presence known except to play martyr with Hermione only increased his fear and worries. Long ago he had made Severus promise not to kill himself; that they needed him and he could make amends for the evils he had committed. But now the times had changed. There was nothing more he could do really. At least in that aspect. Or so he imagined Severus would think. Dumbledore sighed. 'He has so much to offer the world if he would only give in and acknowledge that.'  
  
And with that thought he continued to sit in the chair staring at the sleeping, defeated man and prayed to all the saints to watch over him; and Hermione.  
  
*~*~*~  
  
Severus Snape was having the most bizarre dream. He was for lack of a better word, happy. Or at least in his dream he felt peaceful. And there was someone with him. They were laughing ('Laughing?!') and holding each other talking about nothing in particular. Warm eyes peered up at him, and he smiled down. He felt a sense of completeness he had never felt before. But then darkness surrounded them, and a chill swept through. He tightened his arms around the faceless figure in his arms, desperate to keep it safe. Then all of a sudden there was a tapping sound. He looked around. There was nothing. He looked back to the figure in his arms. It was gone. A deep sense of loss overcame him as he called out for the nameless figure while the tapping sound persisted.  
  
He woke with a start. Suddenly light was streaming in through his window and a figure was opening it. Instinctively Snape reached for his wand when the person spoke.  
  
"Easy my boy, you've just received owl post." Dumbledore reached into a pocket and fished out an owl treat and sent the bird on its way. He looked at the younger man with sparkling eyes.  
  
Snape relaxed when he realized it was only Albus and lay back down on the bed, his heart thudding painfully in his chest. Abruptly he wrapped the sheets around himself tighter and sat up scowling.  
  
"What do you think you are doing?! I was asleep! Why do you always come in at the most un-godly times-"but he was cut off.  
  
"Calm Severus. You have a letter from.Dr. Baringer. He is the current doctor attending to Harry is he not?" The smile he was wearing at Snape's outburst faded when he realized whom the letter was from. He lay down the piece of parchment and left the bedroom so Severus could get dressed. Dumbledore sat down in one of the large wingbacks and conjured up a kettle of tea and a plate of kippers, eggs and toast. As well as a mug of coffee for Severus.  
  
Snape tiredly made his way out of his bedroom a few minutes later still agitated at Dumbledore's presence. However the smell of hot food and coffee eased his disturbance a bit. He sat down and gratefully accepted the cup of coffee. After making his adjustments on the beverage he took a large sip and glared at Albus, however the questioning look in his eyes made him lessen his frown.  
  
"I was merely inquiring as to Potter's state. He has stopped raving like a lunatic, however he is no better, and no worse." Snape explained and took another drink.  
  
"I see. Well, at least he hasn't gotten worse then." Albus thoughtfully stirred his cup of tea. 'Always the optimist,' Severus thought scowling again.  
  
"My turn." Severus sat up straight and returned his glare full- forced. "Just what exactly were you doing in my private bedchamber while I was sleeping?"  
  
"We missed you at breakfast." Snape arched an eyebrow.  
  
"Again." The Headmaster gave what passed for an innocent smile.  
  
"I'm not buying it Albus." Suddenly he had a thought. "Is Hermione okay? What happened?" He leaned forward staring attentively at the Headmaster.  
  
Albus of course picked up on the man's obvious distress, and noted that Hermione's safety was his first response before replying. "No, no. She is fine. Well, that is she is just as she was the last time you saw her. I think. That's not the reason I am here at any rate." He calmly swirled his tea and took in Snape's now visibly relaxing form. The older man's lips twitched slightly, his blue eyes glittering.  
  
Albus offered the plate of food to Severus who hungrily obliged. As Snape ate he explained his reason for being there.  
  
"It is as simple as the fact that I am worried about you. I realize you have been stretched thin lately as results of the spell, but you appear to be, how do I say this, hiding from everyone?"  
  
Snape slowly looked up at his mentor, paused, his face impassive, and then returned his attentions back to his food. "Miss Granger has been a bit troublesome you might say," he growled a moment later. He mumbled under his breath, "Ungrateful little twit.."  
  
"I'm worried about you Severus." Dumbledore stood up and began exploring the living room. He paused every now and then to admire a trinket of Snape's. He seemed particularly fascinated with the miniaturized model of the galaxy in a large glass ball in one corner of the room; Severus had received it as a Christmas present from an aunt last year.  
  
Snape having been watching the Headmaster's observations out of the corner of his eye the whole time stopped shoveling food in his mouth to reply frustratingly, "Don't you have one of those?"  
  
"Yes," Dumbledore sighed happily. Snape rolled his eyes and reached for more toast.  
  
Albus finished his self-tour of Snape's living room and went to stand in front of Severus, who had by now finished his breakfast and was banishing the remains. Snape leaned into the chair, and looked up into Albus' face.  
  
"You do not have to go through with this today," Albus replied, although haltingly. He registered a momentary look of panic in his young friends face.  
  
"But if I don't.she may not.that is to say," he sighed. "Despite the fact that I believe she does not wish to die, she may become too weak to be able to do anything about it. And if I do not go back, she, being the insufferable Gryffindor that she is, could take it as a sign that she is not wanted and will stubbornly let go. The silly child.." He shook his head dejectedly.  
  
"I think I'm close Albus. I must go back today. I will be fine, I assure you." Inside he knew that might not be the case. He rubbed his hands over his face; absently he realized he needed to shave.  
  
"You do realize what could happen if you return to her conscious mind in your weakened state don't you? I'm surprised you are as alert as you are now." Albus surveyed him over his half-moon spectacles.  
  
Snape simply looked at him for a few moments before replying. "I do."  
  
Albus gazed sadly at his young colleague. However, he knew the younger man wouldn't bend. "Well, if you insist Severus. I assume that potion you had brewing in your lab was an energizing concoction of some sort? He smiled at the look Severus shot him. "Well then, I'll leave you to it."  
  
Albus turned to leave; pausing at a chair the cat was now contentedly occupying the back of to scratch his head before leaving. "By the way, have you given this animal a name to call it by until Miss Granger is back?"  
  
"I call it 'cat.' Sometimes even, 'blasted feline.'" Snape said sardonically.  
  
Dumbledore chuckled. "I think he looks like a 'Pendleton, or even a 'Sir Tavisham' call him Tavvy." The cat stared blankly at the Headmaster and he chuckled again.  
  
Snape screwed up his face in disgust. "I can only marvel at how easily entertained you are old man." Dumbledore beamed at him and made for the door. Once there he stopped and turned to face Snape.  
  
"Severus.." His voice was serious and almost pleading. The assurance clearly making itself known with the simple word. Snape nodded and watched the older man exit his rooms. He sighed and headed towards the lab to bottle up the now cool potion and swallow a vial of it. Afterwards he took a shower and prepared for the next visit with Hermione. He was definitely not looking forward to the aftereffects of this one--Fulcio potion or no. *~*~*~  
  
Snape was feeling a bit better, now that the Fulcio potion was taking full effect, and he was quickly walking to the infirmary. Passing the staff room he could hear a woman who sounded like she had been crying. He halted wondering if he should see whom it was when he thought he heard Minerva speak up as well; she too sounded odd. He listened outside the door.  
  
"Filius' new supplements arrived today for next year," sniffled Cerelia Sprout. He heard the sound of someone blowing their nose.  
  
"Yes. Vector's shipment should be coming in as well very soon," came Minerva's Scottish voice. "Oh.we'll have to hire new teachers too as well as a new caretaker to take over Filch's spot, bless him. I do so not relish that unhappy task-"her voice cracked.  
  
"Oh, it just won't be the same. Not without them, it just won't," wailed the distraught Herbology professor.  
  
"I know Ceri, I know, but we've got to go on. No one can ever take their places, but we must move on. We cannot let this get us down. Just think of all the poor students who lost their families during the war, we have to be strong for them. It will be okay with time." her voice trailed off sadly.  
  
From somewhere in the room Gamula Hooch's voice piped up, "And then there's Severus.has anyone heard anything from him lately? He's starting to worry me."  
  
Someone sighed, and Ceri continued to sniffle and said haltingly, "Yes, I am too. You don't think he's-"Minerva cut her off.  
  
"No! He'll be fine. You shouldn't think that Ceri." If he could have seen the women in the room, he would have seen the stricken looks on their faces. Particularly McGonagall's. "Severus is just.tired. That's all.he's just tired. He's been so busy, and he hasn't gotten proper rest.." She was just babbling as if trying to convince herself of his safety. The Herbology professor began softly sobbing again and Snape heard shuffling. He quickly turned away from the doorway and continued on to the infirmary lost in his thoughts.  
  
'Are they seriously worried about me? Nonsense.' He pushed open the door angrily and made for Hermione's bed. Albus was already there waiting for him.  
  
"Good afternoon Severus. Nice to see you again." Albus smiled despondently.  
  
Snape quirked an eyebrow and Madam Pomfrey made her way over to him.  
  
"Severus! Hello, how are you this afternoon?" she asked nervously and taking in his appearance whipped out her wand and began taking readings.  
  
He rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to protest but she beat him to it.  
  
"Endure it." She said sternly. Albus chuckled and Snape's frown increased. "Oh, I just don't know about this.you really are in no state...," she fussed. "You've taken something I see." Snape nodded.  
  
"I made a higher concentration of Fulcio last night." The medi-witch nodded cautiously.  
  
"Well," she sniffed. "If it were up to me, I would try a different angle." Both men opened their mouths to reply but she went on. "However, I cannot argue that this would be the best way, for Hermione's sake." She looked at Snape. "You just be careful. It could be very dangerous this time. And you will follow my every direction when you come back Severus, do I make myself clear?" Her eyes bore into his. He glowered but nodded.  
  
"She's quite strict isn't she Severus. I think she takes joy in bossing us around, eh?" the Headmaster said.  
  
"I wouldn't doubt it; she's a nurse, and a female at that." Snape grumbled. Poppy clucked, but smiled in spite of herself. Snape hastily moved away from her to take his place at Hermione's bedside and gently took her small hands in his. He rubbed his thumbs over her fingers and closed his eyes, preparing to concentrate. He missed the knowing look shared between Albus and Poppy.  
  
Albus began the complex incantation again, as Snape once again waited for his cue to begin. He focused hard and mentally began asking for permission as his mouth muttered the spell. His head was getting light, but other than that no change. No tingle. He squeezed his eyes harder and concentrated with all his might, demanding his admittance. Still nothing. His heartbeat quickened and he vaguely heard Poppy shifting uncomfortably. Albus' voice faltered when he realized what was going on, but quickly regained his composure and kept on. Severus began sweating and he could hear the blood rushing through his ears.  
  
'Hermione, let me in. Please let in Hermione. You don't want to do this. Trust me, please don't give in. Just let me help you, I swear I will. Hermione.'  
  
He heard Poppy softly cry out after 5 more minutes of saying the spell.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Thanks to Kel, Lenea, Gam (heh, did you catch it? Just for you dear. =P) Thank you sooo much for reading and reviewing!! I can't do it without your support. Tis a sad thing I depend so much on them isn't it? Don't worry, it's gonna quicken up now..  
  
Also, Cerelia as in Professor Sprouts name means, "Goddess of the Harvest" in Greek. Ironically her name shortened to Ceri, means "Love" in Welsh. I like that language too. =D And Fulcio means "to strengthen" in Latin. 


	7. A New Beginning

Disclaimer: Not mine. J.K. Rowling's.  
  
~Touchstone~ Chapter Seven  
  
By Gin  
Snape was trembling with effort ten minutes into the spell and was getting nowhere. His resolve was starting to weaken when the familiar tingling feeling took over him, and he faded into Hermione's mind. He just heard Poppy cry out with relief as he collapsed into his chair. Snape automatically closed his eyes against the blinding white light that always initially greeted him, but this time there was no need.  
  
The room started out as a dull white, which would normally take on a golden hue, but this time didn't stop fading until it became uncharacteristically dark. It was actually rather hard to see in at first. He let his eyes adjust to the light, or lack thereof, and his worries increased as he looked around the room. The fire was no longer burning at the hearth, and the room was cold. The state of the room, her mind, troubled him; he knew this could not be good. He heavily walked to the center of the room and called her name.  
  
"Hermione?" He waited for her response and stared at the door she usually came through. His fears escalated when she didn't respond so he walked towards the door and he could feel his strength slowly draining away. Halfway there it opened and he stopped mid-stride. Her head slowly peeked out and she looked pathetic. His stomach lurched at the sight of her. Her skin was sallow, her eyes hollow, and her hair was a mess.  
  
Her pallid complexion reflected the dim light and she slowly bent in on herself unable to keep a straight posture. She was struggling for breath and leaned against the doorway, ready to collapse. Snape quickly strode over to her and gathered her up in his arms.  
  
"Hermione." she was dry sobbing against his chest. 'She doesn't want to give up; you have to save her Severus.' He calmly rubbed her back and rocked her back and forth. "Hermione, look at you. You don't want this," he murmured against her ear, his deep silky voice was ringing in her ears and she leaned into him.  
  
"It's driving you mad; let me take you back. I swear you'll not regret it. Please. Come back with me," he whispered softly.  
  
Her voice sounded small and weak as she replied, "It would be like this only worse, and I should just go." Her voice cracked and her sobs resumed. Snape readjusted her position so that she was sitting in his lap and lying against his chest, her head tucked just under his chin. He closed his eyes. Surprisingly this felt comfortable for him. He also knew they didn't have much time so he let his instincts take over.  
  
Hermione felt safe in arms. Like she never wanted to leave them again. It was the most peculiar thought she'd ever had. And she loved the feel of him beneath her, around her, his arms enveloping her. But all this was.muffled. It was hard to explain. He was right; she was slowly going insane. And yet the promise he was making her, that everything would be all right, she had something to go back to, was so tempting. If not for her career, then for Harry. 'But the moment I go back Harry will die, and I'll have to experience the pain again.' She said as much aloud.  
  
Snape's voice grew harsher. "You are a Gryffindor Miss Granger. Gryffindor's are famous for dealing with catastrophes. Why should you be any different?" His breath now became laboured.  
  
Hermione couldn't explain it. It was such a deep feeling of loss that it was hard to put into words. "I should just go."  
  
"No. You shouldn't." He wrapped his arms around her tighter. His mind was screaming at him to stop this.affection, but his heart and body was urging him on. And even still, the emotions he knew should be here were somewhat, well, muffled was the only word he could think of. Then he had a thought.  
  
'Hermione mentioned the pain was muffled.so all feelings must be subdued here. If this feels.somewhat right now, then what would it be like in the real world?' This thought nagged and wormed its way into his mind, and he was almost looking forward to it. 'No, she's just a child. No, not a child. Just younger.' He heard Hermione whimper and he nuzzled his face into her hair. 'Severus, watch it, you're fighting a losing battle.' but with the feeling of her delicate hand lazily running over his chest, he quickly told his mind to shut up.  
  
What he didn't know was that Hermione had also suddenly gotten this thought as well. 'Maybe.maybe this can be good. Surely he doesn't just act like this to everyone? No. He's just trying to coax me out. Well,' she thought, 'it's certainly working. And maybe he is right. Maybe I can salvage my life. Oh, but what if I can't. What if I lose more.' Hermione trembled.  
  
Snape ran a delicate finger down her cheek and under her chin, lifting her face up to his. He peered into her eyes and held her gaze for the longest of moments. It felt as if time almost seemed to stop. His heart won out over his mind.  
  
"Come," he whispered.  
  
She looked at him uncertainly.  
  
"Trust me," he said again with feeling.  
  
This time as she gazed into his eyes, realization dawned upon her and she paused. Severus held his breath as he awaited her response. He wanted to make her better. Like a fool, he wanted to try to make her happy. Maybe in saving her, he would save himself. It sounded selfish, but didn't he deserve it too? Didn't she? Maybe they had both suffered enough.  
  
Hermione thought about what he was offering her. He was giving her himself. But did she want it. Her heart immediately cried out yes. Her mind was weary, but also hopeful. She had always admired him from afar, but had never made the connection. In here she could feel their bond. And she realized he was perfect for her. Could she go back and try again with him? The answer came easily.  
  
She leaned back and held his gaze. Her hand snaked down and found his. He started, but quickly grasped it in return.  
  
"I trust you." Severus searched her eyes and saw that she was being honest. She wanted to try again with him too. He smiled, and Hermione thought he had never been more attractive. He lowered his head and placed a soft kiss on her cheek.  
  
"Then let us away."  
  
They closed their eyes. Snape was praying they had enough strength to get out and make it back home. He could feel Hermione concentrating on him as well. This was more up to her than him. But the tugging feeling came soon enough and he gave in, hoping she would follow.  
  
*~*~*~  
  
Snape felt himself gain consciousness again and waking up slowly. He honestly was surprised he had made it. Most likely he wouldn't have if he hadn't taken the Fulcio potion that morning but he was still incredibly weak. Once he was able to sit up, he immediately turned to Hermione and gazed intently at her. She hadn't stirred yet.  
  
The room was thick with tension. Albus and Poppy had realized this was it- Hermione either came back, or she was lost forever. Snape felt as if his entire being was focusing on this one moment. He squeezed her hands and held his breath, willing her to wake up. Still, no reply. Dumbledore closed his eyes and sighed while Poppy was nervously twisting her dress around her fingers.  
  
Suddenly Hermione gasped and everyone in the room jumped. Her body tensed and she let the air slowly out of her lungs. Poppy took a step forward but was stayed by the Headmaster's arm. Snape leaned forward close to her face. He didn't know whether she was alive or dying. His stomach was turning somersaults.  
  
Then her eyes fluttered open and she winced. She wasn't used to the light yet. Snape let out the breath he'd been holding, as had the other two occupants of the room. Hermione blinked and noticed the dark figure looming above her face, and he was grinning. The corners of her mouth slightly turned up and she tried to speak. But her throat was dry and sensitive from lack of use and no logical sound came out. At this Poppy ran forward, wand out already diagnosing Hermione's condition. She was incredibly weak, but alive. The medi-witch bustled off and returned momentarily with a dull green liquid. She gently tipped the weaker version of the strengthening potion down her throat. The girl winced at the foul taste and all the while the Headmaster was smiling.  
  
Letting Hermione recuperate, Poppy secretly took Severus' readings, whose hands had never left his former students. She squeaked.  
  
"Severus Snape! You get in bed right this moment!" He was startled and jumped at her yells and glowered at her. She came round the bed, helped him up and ushered him into the next bed to give him equal treatment, plus a sleeping draught.  
  
Once he swallowed the vile liquids he sleepily turned his head and peered at Hermione. She was still. His eyes widened slightly and he started to get up but Dumbledore appeared out of seemingly nowhere and placed a firm hand on his shoulder.  
  
"It's alright my boy. She's just asleep. I suggest you do the same." Snape again winced at the fatherly endearment, but did as he was told and let his body get the restoring it so badly had needed.  
  
*~*~*~  
  
When Snape awoke the next morning having actually slept somewhat peacefully he felt much more refreshed. He lay in bed a few moments and let his mind catch up to the present. He rolled over to look at Hermione; she appeared to be sleeping calmly. He silently watched her chest rise and fall rhythmically. Soon Poppy came bustling in to check on her patients and noticed Severus was awake. She politely coughed alerting Severus to her presence and walked over to him, taking his readings and feeling his forehead. He took it quietly but scowled nonetheless. Satisfied she said she'd return with breakfast and left him his clothes at the end of the bed.  
  
He got up and changed and sat back down on the bed to wait for the food and took in Hermione's sleeping form. She looked so much more peaceful, and he noticed he felt somewhat changed. He remembered the way he had reacted to her last night and wondered if it had just been the stress speaking for them. 'Or maybe she was just so desperate she'd agree to anything at that point.' He smirked.  
  
Having eaten his fill, made sure by Madam Pomfrey herself, she excused him from her care but warned him to take it easy. She had said not to worry about Hermione, and that she would be okay once she was fully relaxed after a few days and Snape departed for the gloomy area he called home. When he entered his rooms he was greeted by an excited Crookshanks who was mewing loudly and rubbed against Snape's legs affectionately. Snape crouched down to scratch the cat's ears.  
  
"Well, your Mistress is home. You'll hardly want to stay here, be glad." He then went to replenish the animal's food and water and take a long shower. As he stood under the hot spray he contemplated his feelings. He thought that maybe they would be more intensified compared to last night and wondered if that was possible. He wondered what it would be like to see her back as her normal self. She certainly had enough wit; she might even be a formidable sparring partner, and she was very intelligent. She could be nice to have around. Maybe she would even teach here. He felt guilty for thinking that. She would most likely choose Charms, so he felt like he was betraying his deceased friend. However, he knew Filius would want it that way. He had also seen how passionate she could be and he wondered what it would feel like to have that kind of passion directed at him, in a non-hateful way that is. He shook his head annoyed with his whimsical musings and stepped out of the shower to dry off.  
  
He changed into a pair of black slacks and a white knit short-sleeved shirt. He wanted to walk around outside today. He'd been cooped up inside for far too long. He went into the living room and opened the curtains to let some sunlight in. 'See, I'm not always a vampire,' he thought ruefully. A knock sounded at the door and he turned to see who could possibly be bothering him now. He sighed when he looked through the invisible peep-hole he'd charmed into the door and opened it a fraction of an inch.  
  
"What."  
  
Minerva McGonagall and Cerelia Sprout stood patiently outside his doorway.  
  
"May we come in Severus?" Minerva asked with her Scottish lilt. Cerelia nodded beside her. He groaned and opened the door allowing them to enter.  
  
"I can't even get rest when I'm ordered too," he said unenthusiastically.  
  
"Nonsense. We've just come to see how you're doing." Minerva eyed him. "Apparently better judging from your cheek," she sniffed.  
  
"We were worried about you Severus and wanted to see how you were now. We've already been to see Hermione, but she wasn't awake yet." Cerelia noticed his apparel. "Are you going somewhere? We didn't mean to keep you."  
  
"I was considering going outside, if that's quite alright with you two harpies." He leaned against the wall, arms crossed. The two women grinned. "Where's your third leg? Hooch decide to skip out on this unplanned and highly bothersome visit?" Snape said in his silkiest voice.  
  
"No," said Minerva. "She's in Hogsmeade. The newest broom model came out on display today. Get the economy rolling and whatnot."  
  
"Hmm, well if you're already in such good spirits Severus, I've some Mandrake seedlings that need to be re-potted," Sprout said, batting her eyelashes. Snape's eyebrow shot up.  
  
He muttered something under his breath. "So this wasn't a casual visit." His voice was cold, but his lips formed a small grin. "At your service as usual Cerelia." He mock bowed causing a giggle from the elated little woman. 'Damn her, she's always so polite.'  
  
"Wonderful, I'll be in the greenhouses in about an hour, if that's alright with you of course?" Snape nodded.  
  
"Well, we'll leave you alone then. I trust we'll see you at dinner," the Transfiguration teacher said skeptically.  
  
"Well if it's a command," he said sourly. The women smiled and said goodbye leaving Snape alone to close and ward his door before heading outside.  
  
He headed out towards the lake. It really was a pleasant day for June, the wind had a slight breeze to it, and just enough clouds to provide the occasional shade. He lifted his face to the sun, soaking in its warmth. Eventually he moved around to the gardens. This was one of his favorite places, especially at night, when all the flowers would be in bloom in the summer, and the smell of roses filled the air. Plus, it was a great place to find unsuspected students snogging.  
  
Suddenly he felt as if someone was staring at him and he turned around. But no one was there. Carefully he turned back to his original direction, but could still not shake the feeling. He looked up at the castle and noticed a person in white looking down at him. It was where the infirmary was, which had to mean Hermione was up. And she was watching him. He thought it rather odd that she should be up and out of bed but nevertheless felt a flash of warmth seep in, and he set off to a hidden side door to go up to check on her. He was almost excited to see her, but he kept his emotions carefully in check as he neared the Hospital wing, he knew Hermione would probably be in a distraught mood.  
  
He calmly opened the door to the infirmary and stepped in. No one else was about and Hermione was still staring out the window so he watched her for a few moments before alerting her to his presence. When he did, she still didn't move and he took a few steps towards her.  
  
"Hermione?" She didn't react. He cleared his throat, "Miss Granger? Are you alright?" This time she turned her head slightly in acknowledgement and continued her gaze out the window.  
  
"I don't know whether I should be thanking you, or trying to kill you," she whispered.  
  
He walked towards her, "Well, I'll leave that up to your discretion." He said it jokingly, but he might as well have been serious. "How are you?"  
  
She was quiet for a few moments before she answered. "I'm tired. And it hurts, but."her voice trailed off. Snape stood there staring out the window as well, his emotions all jumbled up inside. "Where is Harry?"  
  
Snape had almost forgotten about him. He chose his words carefully.  
  
"He's at St. Mungo's. I've just received a letter from his doctor. He hasn't gotten worse if that's what you're worrying about."  
  
"But not any better?"  
  
"No." He paused remembering it was possible to talk to Potter now, but he wondered if it was wise to let her see him yet. "Perhaps you could write a letter to him? I'm sure he'd be glad to get something from you." He was reaching for anything and knew she could tell.  
  
"Would he be able to read it?" She asked. Snape remained silent. "Then what good would it do."  
  
Snape sighed. "Well you must do something. You cannot stay up here and pout; it's time to move on."  
  
"Correct me if I'm wrong Professor, but you've already tried that approach haven't you?" She said tartly.  
  
He glared at her and went to inspect the shelves of ingredients on the walls. "Well then," he asked picking up a bottle of Skel-E-Grow disinterestedly, "what would you like to do?" Hermione was staring at his long fingers wrapped around the bottle.  
  
"I'm not sure.I haven't really thought about it much." With that she turned her attention back to the window. Snape had noticed an almost empty bottle of Mandrake root and remembered his appointment with Cerelia Sprout. He turned to look back at Hermione, she looked so lost.  
  
But still, he couldn't baby her. Now that she was here, it was time she move on and stop this. He wouldn't coddle her. 'Even if holding her again sounds tempting-'he shook his head.  
  
"Well," he stood awkwardly in the room facing her. "I'm afraid I have to leave you, I have a prior engagement to attend to." He paused. "Will you be needing anything?" She didn't answer.  
  
At that moment Madam Pomfrey came in and yelled at him. "Severus! Leave! Miss Granger needs her rest! And speaking of that, you should be resting as well, although I'm sure it would do me no good to tell you that." she muttered.  
  
He spared her a glance telling her he was just leaving as well, turned on his heel and headed down to the greenhouses and Professor Sprout in thought.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: Ok.now the fun really starts. What do you guys think? Plus, stick around for some serious angst, it's gonna be great...I can't wait. *sigh*  
  
THANK YOU to Kel, Gam and Lenea for their wonderful support and beta'ing!!! I couldn't have done it without you. And to the lovely, lovely people who fed my ego. I'm still having fun writing this and I'll definitely keep write more. 


	8. Discoveries and Honeysuckle

~Touchstone~ Chapter Eight  
  
By Gin  
Snape inhaled deeply. Even if he had to withstand the piercing screams from the Mandrake seedlings, (his headache wasn't as bad as he had anticipated) despite the fact that he did get dirt flung all over him from a particularly rowdy Venomous Tentacula plant, he had very much enjoyed his exercise outside today. Now he stood in front of his mirror, still dripping wet with a towel wrapped around his waist, staring at his reflection. He had been thinking all day about her again. 'Damnit.' Even while he was working alongside Cerelia he was thinking of ways to help Hermione. He knew she should visit Harry, but it could turn out to have a worse effect on her than without seeing him if she didn't see him at all. He'd ask Albus his opinion on that.  
  
"Maybe I should see Harry first." He pondered aloud. That way if he looks completely horrible or if it looks like he just won't make it, he would know to not bring her to him.  
  
He looked at his face and raised his eyebrow. 'Don't know why you're so concerned ole boy. Think you'll get brownie points for making her comfortable? What do you care?' He berated himself and straightened.  
  
'I don't care.'  
  
'Well, obviously you do if you keep acting this way. You think she gives a flying fuck about you?'  
  
'No. I didn't say that.'  
  
'Then stop acting so silly. She's a young girl who would never take an interest in you. You're no catch, and you're old enough to be her father.'  
  
His expression fell and he raised his long fingers to his face and ran them along his chin. He knew he was no beauty, but he wasn't that bad. But surely, a girl like Hermione wouldn't find him attractive, even when the Appearance Detracting Charm was gone. Hell, he barely found anything good about himself. His nose was still by far too large, though he had grown somewhat fond of it; it was a Snape inheritance. And he didn't like his chin. However, he did like his voice. His voice always commanded attention and when he turned up the charm that voice could get almost anything he wanted- particularly from the ladies. He smirked, even some of the men.he shuddered remembering that ungraceful event many years ago. Also he did appreciate his eyes. They also seemed to grab interest, they added to his dark demeanour and allure. 'What allure?'  
  
He scowled at his reflection and immature thoughts and left the bathroom to get changed. Snape knew they'd do some sort of ceremony for the Solstice, and he found himself hoping Hermione would be well enough to join them. Tonight everyone would dress simply, so he'd have to tone it down a bit. Plus he'd have to go barefoot, not that he really minded it; there were no students around he supposed. It was a part of the get-in- touch-with-Mother-earth ritual, and he could respect that. He selected a simple pair of black slacks and a loose, breezy, dark brown collared shirt. He unbuttoned the top button, then decided to re-button it. He toyed with it a few times before finally deciding to leave the top one undone. He groaned, frustrated that he was fussing this much over his appearance, quickly applied a drying charm to his hair, and went to brush his teeth and shave. The cat sat on the foot of the bed silently watching his complicated roommate. Snape happened to notice the animal watching him, almost mocking him, and gave him a look- which the cat returned. Snape shook his head and reached for his cologne, which he personally made.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Hermione had been asked if she felt up to coming down for the small feast tonight in celebration of the Summer Solstice. Madam Pomfrey had said she could attend if she didn't stay out too long and went straight back to bed afterwards. Hermione smirked, she almost felt like a little kid again. She hadn't been told to not stay out late since she was a teenager. Not like she ever needed to be told that anyway; she hardly had a life outside of Hogwarts.  
  
Dumbledore, insisting she was welcome as long as she'd like and oddly enough winking, offered her a set of spare rooms in Gryffindor Tower until Poppy had deemed her healthy enough to not only leave the infirmary but the castle as well. So here she sat, with a towel around her head and a silk bath robe clinging to her wet form staring at herself in the mirror. She had been thinking of him all day. She enjoyed watching him that morning as he was strolling through the garden. He looked calm and relaxed and it had taken her mind off her then-present train of thought. He had come to see her just as she had been replaying the images of her parents' deaths. It was all so depressing. She had also been wondering where Crookshanks was. She made a mental note to ask Dumbledore about that later that evening.  
  
Then there was Harry. She didn't think she could stand seeing him barely alive- she was so close to him. They had even dated in their seventh year. She unwrapped the towel from her hair and smiled as she remembered their 'first-time.' It wasn't great, and neither were the following times. She remembered feeling so embarrassed about it. But they soon learned that they could never be anything serious and instead opted for their close platonic relationship again. Luckily they never told Ron as he would have spazzed out on them for sure as they both knew Ron had had a secret crush on her before. Even though he told Harry he was over her, Harry knew it would still upset him to know his best friend was with his other best friend after having liked her for so long. She sighed. She missed them so much.  
  
Harry and Ron had never left her side after her family's attack. She remembered how angry they were for 'allowing' that to happen, as they said. She felt so grateful to have them-or, to have had them. Now all she had was Harry, or of much of him as remained, and this bizarre difficulty that was Severus Snape.  
  
She blinked a tear away, cast a drying spell on her hair, and then rose to select something from the wardrobe. She felt guilty; some of her new clothes were things Minerva and Cerelia had bought for her in Hogsmeade after they collected some of her own personal items from her flat in London.  
  
"New clothes always cheer me up," they had argued. However, they made her promise to think nothing of it, at least around them.  
  
"Well, I suppose tonight is the first step in starting over. So what does one wear to a celebration of a Summer Solstice?" she wondered aloud.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Back in Dumbledore's study, a very proud Headmaster and Mistress sat drinking tea, complimenting the other on the exquisite décor of the Great Hall for the evening.  
  
"So, my dear Minerva. Is our young friend coming this evening?" Albus Dumbledore asked over his cup of tea.  
  
"I believe so," she grinned.  
  
"And the other one?" he smiled in reply.  
  
Minerva set her own cup of tea down and responded with another wicked grin, "Of course." He chuckled mischievously.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The enchanted ceiling glittered with the first stars that evening at dinner. Tonight was the Summer Solstice, and all the remaining faculty was dining together to celebrate. It was the first night they had all been together for dinner since the students had left and they welcomed the break and the chance to be together. Everyone had worn simple, yet oddly elegant attire for the occasion, in earthy colors. Of course Cerelia, being the most "in-tune" with Mother Nature, showed them all up, as she always did. The usually dumpy little witch glowed prettily under the several compliments directed towards that evening. There were only a few more faculty members than usual over the summer, owing to the horrific activities of just under a week ago, but after tonight most had decided they would return home to their lives and families.  
  
Snape entered the Hall quietly, and took in his surroundings. Usually he absolutely could not stand Albus' idea of "colourful decorations," but tonight he mildly approved. There were dark green vines magicked to grow on the walls of the Hall, covering them. Small, round bulbs of light with small flowering vines were hovering in the air, giving the enormous room a soft glowing haze. Small butterflies were fluttering about adding to the outdoor theme, and the floor had been transformed into a rich green carpet of earth and grass. He looked around and swore he heard the sound of trickling water somewhere. The air smelled of the outdoors and he inhaled- it smelled like the woods his father used to take him and his siblings to when they camped out every year. He took a few steps through the door and reveled in the feel of the cool grass against his bare feet. Then he found it. He knew this embellishment would be too good to be true- there a few feet away from him was a pixie. Glowing bright pink and squeaking merrily against the fake backdrop of the room. It fluttered towards him and he narrowed his eyes. 'I'll do it.I swear I will you little bugger..' The pixie, paying no heed to the unpleasant grimace on the dark man's face came closer still until she was just a few inches away.  
  
"Severus! Come in, come in!" the Headmaster had noticed his arrival and was beckoning to him, and looked away continuing his conversation with Minerva. Severus took this opportunity this to casually stretch..and flick the little pink bastard into oblivion, sending her flying into a wall. His lips twitched as he heard the tiny high pitched voice grow fainter and all of a sudden stop with very small thud and an "Ow!" Satisfied he sauntered over to Albus and appreciatively nodded.  
  
"Well, I'm glad to see it passes muster Severus," he prodded. "However, I cannot take all the credit. Minerva also helped, and did most of the work." The Transfiguration teacher blushed and swatted at Albus with her hand demurely. Snape's lips twitched, he had long now thought they would have made the perfect couple, although he would never tell anyone he had actually thought it. Of course, that was to say if they weren't already. He grinned this time, and then stopped thinking of the one disappointment he found in the décor.  
  
"Pixie." he sneered lightly.  
  
"What? Oh yes," Albus grinned brightly. "I'm sorry Severus, I just couldn't help myself. There's only one, so don't worry." Snape inclined his head, his eyes glittering darkly and nodded.  
  
Snape then looked around the room, nonchalantly trying to find a certain someone who had, apparently, not arrived. His shoulders slumped ever-so-slightly before he recovered and turned his attention back to Albus and Minerva. She was explaining everything she had transfigured in order to achieve tonight's ornamentations. It was about this time that Gamula Hooch wandered over to their little group and quietly greeted the Potions master, making sure he saw her give him the official dramatic once-over.  
  
"Snape."  
  
"Hooch." He tried not to smile. He knew she was just dying to get a jab in at him and figured she was told to take it easy on him tonight. 'To hell with that.'  
  
"I thought I saw you outside this afternoon making a spectacle of yourself on that new broom you bought. Shameful really. That a person should be acting so inappropriately at a time like this.tsk tsk," he said shaking his head. Her eyes widened and she smirked. 'Here it comes.'  
  
"Hm. Well, at least I'm outside living life to the fullest, instead of being holed up in my dungeon practicing how to glow in the dark," she leered, her eyes positively laughing. "And I can guarantee that if it was a spectacle I was making, it was an enjoyable one. Besides, when was the last time you had a broomstick between your legs Severus." She added tartly. She bit her tongue to keep from making another rather crude joke. Poppy had just joined them, grinning at Gamula's comment and told her to play nice.  
  
His lips twitched again and he struggled to keep a calm face. One of his favourite pastimes was arguing with the Flying instructor. Well, that and baiting Minerva.  
  
"I'll thank you to kindly keep your thoughts away from anywhere near the area in between my legs Madam Hooch," he said silkily. She couldn't help it this time, she laughed. As did the other staff members around them.  
  
"Well, now that the pleasantries are over, perhaps we can get to the feast?" Albus suggested cheerily. He never grew tired of eating. It was at that moment that the door opened again, and a frail, but much more improved looking Hermione came in through the doors. It was with very strict internal control that Severus managed to keep his face from betraying his immediate reaction. Albus, Minerva and Poppy all smiled secretly.  
  
'Damn she looks good..' He cleared his throat and quickly looked around to see if anyone had noticed his eyes widening and waited for her to join them.  
  
She was wearing a simple pale green dress, with a chiffon layer over the top, the neckline plunging just enough to leave one curious, but not exposing too much. It had rolled straps that led to a mid-back length at her shoulders. The fabric was loose around her chest and the dress freely flowed down from just below her breasts, giving a wavy look to the gown, almost Grecian in appearance. Her hair had been artfully messed up into a golden clasp that ran over the top of her head to hold her curls that had small white flowers intertwined in, with the remaining locks spilling down her back. Snape swallowed.  
  
Minerva was positively gushing; she had picked out that one. "Excellent choice my dear, you look beautiful," she said giving the younger girl a slight kiss on the cheek. Hermione blushed. She had been wondering if she had been overdoing it or not. But, from the looks of the other female staff members, she was appropriately attired.  
  
She then was greeted by the other professors and finally her gaze settled on the dark figure standing off to the side of the crowd. She swallowed. 'Dear gods.' he looked absolutely delicious. She had never seen him so casual, and yet so..sexy! And his feet were bare. Well, naturally everyone's were, and she hadn't ever thought herself a foot person, in her opinion, but his feet were incredible! She then slowly dragged her eyes up. She noticed he had a rather lean body to which his slacks hugged agreeably; it was very nice. It was a crime to have that body hidden behind those huge school robes! When her gaze finally settled on his face he had quirked an eyebrow and was looking rather amused.  
  
"I do hope I have passed your inspection, Miss Granger," he said quietly. Her cheeks flushed another shade of red, realizing how obvious her gaze had just been. She heard him smirk, and she silently berated herself but defiantly brought her eyes to stare in to his. They were gleaming and she realized that they weren't black as she had thought, but the darkest shade of brown she had ever seen. She was also having a hard time looking away from those dark pools. His lips twitched and he spoke.  
  
"Perhaps we should join the others and make our way over to the table for dinner?" He was thoroughly enjoying himself at the moment.  
  
She nodded and hesitatingly took the proffered arm and let him guide her to the High table. They ate a Glazed Corned Beef with Lentils and she noticed there were more breads and fruits than were normally present. Not that she minded; it was a nice change. Professor Sprout was seated on her right and Snape to her left. Hermione was so nervous; he was so close.  
  
Sprout turned her attention to Hermione to exclaim how lovely she looked. "I almost talked Minerva out of it; I didn't realize how nice the colour really suited you. But I'm glad I didn't," she smiled warmly.  
  
"Thank you. I must say, you look wonderful this evening as well. Are those real flowers?" Ceri nodded.  
  
"Grew them myself," the little witch beamed. "I have to admit, I do always look forward to the Summer Solstice. It was a wonderful idea of Albus to do this. We've never really celebrated it like this before. Usually I'm the only one who gets excited about it." Her smile then faded. "We definitely needed it, that's for sure." She added. Hermione smiled slightly.  
  
The rest of the meal was eaten in relative peace for her. Well, a nervous peace; she didn't talk to anyone much more. It was most frustrating. She felt ungrateful for having her guilty feelings of being here, enjoying this night. She wondered what poor Harry was doing, and how the Weasley's were. She sighed and poked at her honey-rum-tart. Snape picked up on her quiet behaviour.  
  
"I'm sure the House-elves would be happy to know you've mutilated their excellent honey tart instead of eating it." He grinned despite himself. She turned giving him a half-hearted smile and stared at him. He turned his head a bit more to look at her questioningly. She blinked and looked away. 'You did it again! Honestly Granger, it's not hard to not stare at someone. For the love of Merlin.' Snape's eyes sparkled.  
  
'She was staring again wasn't she.' he thought and inwardly smiled. He let his gaze linger a bit longer than what should have been necessary for the sole purpose of agitating her.  
  
Once dinner was over Dumbledore stood and glancing around the table, banished it, then looked up towards the Enchanted Ceiling. He slowly brought his gaze down to his friends and smiled kindly.  
  
"Now my friends, if we could all prepare for the ceremony. If you would all please make your way to the circle on the main floor." He clapped his hands twice and a large circle lined with small white stones appeared on the grassy floor. Everyone obediently stood and stepped down from the raised platform and silently entered the stone circle. Professor Snape stood on Hermione's left again, but this time Lenea Vector stood on Hermione's right. She smiled gently at her former student, and was extremely pleased to see her out and about.  
  
Hermione could feel the magic humming through the air and into her, it felt so wonderful. She breathed in deeply; perhaps things will look up, she thought idly. She happened to catch a snip of Snape's cologne as well and she quietly inhaled again. It was wonderful, a musky scent with a trace of some kind of herb or spice. Whatever it was, it was amazing. He absently brushed his arm against hers which sent small shivers through her. 'Get a grip Granger!' She silently commanded. The Headmaster came last, just following Minerva, completing the circle.  
  
"Tonight is a very special night." He began. "We are surrounded by those who love us," he said expertly glancing at Hermione. "We are all very fortunate to be here together, and I think we all know this. These past few years have been very trying and only appeared to get worse, I know. And from the very bottom of my heart, I thank you, each and every one of you." He looked around at every face in the room before he continued, "No one could ask for a finer group of people. Now, however, is a time for celebration, renewal, and happiness. Tonight, we will be performing the Compages expurgo spell. To bind us to the earth, and honour it; and to bind us to each other, so that we may honour each other."  
  
Dumbledore then clapped his hands once more, and the glowing bulbs above their heads slowly dimmed, while thousands upon thousands of dancing, glowing fireflies swirled around them. Severus watched in awe at the beauty surrounding him and glanced at Hermione. The little moving lights were playing on her face and his eyes softened. Dumbledore then held out his hands to the people on both his sides. Minerva and Poppy each took hold and continued the pattern until the circle was fully connected. Snape gently took hold of Hermione's hand, and she marveled at how warm and soft they were. His thumb slowly caressed her knuckles and she suppressed another shiver. Everyone but Albus, Minerva, and Poppy closed their eyes and the three, as one, silently murmured a little spell while keeping their gazes fixed on Snape and Hermione. Albus smiled and nodded and the two witches closed their eyes.  
  
Everyone seemed to know to turn their faces towards the Heavens as Albus began his invocation of magic. Dumbledore began in a surprisingly deep, but commanding tone, his voice reverberating off the ivy-covered walls. It was if he was personally asking all of creation to listen to him and oblige. A warm tingle stretched throughout the congregation and an enormous sense of peace spread all through them as the Earth slowly regarded their presence. Hermione could feel the magic flowing through her veins suddenly come fully alive and respond to the words. His voice became louder then paused as the rest of the people present joined in the chant having known their cue. The very ground beneath their feet seemed to quiver in response to the powerful spell and everyone increased their grips on the people next to them. Earthly scents and fragrances permeated the air as a gentle breeze swept through. The soft tingle increased until it became almost pleasurable as everyone's strength was shared as a whole. Small little puffs of wind continuously swept past Hermione's face and body, and little buzzing sounds hummed in her ear. The spell was getting stronger and Hermione, being in a weakened state, gasped at the sheer power flowing through her, which caused Snape to grip her hand. She felt a pleasant calmness come over her as Snape concentrated beside her. Tears filled her eyes, her knees felt weak, and just when she thought she could take no more, the spell was lifted in a frenzied rush, followed by a deep silence, and yet there wasn't closure.  
  
Hermione opened her eyes and noticed everyone had their faces still pointed upwards. She then noticed that the swirling lights had gathered into a huge, glowing ball in the center above their heads and was almost humming. Snape's eyes were still closed and his grip on her hand tightened once more as a huge surge of energy rushed through her; then the ball of golden light burst into tiny lights again causing gasps from the crowd.  
  
The lights slowly dissipated and the room grew dark. Suddenly the dimmed flowered bulbs above them slowly grew in intensity and everyone let go of their hands and smiled breathing a bit heavily. It had been such a powerful moment. Hermione nor Snape neither noticed that they had not yet let go of each other's hands, as they were trying to get the intense emotions that had just flooded their senses back under control. When they did, however, Snape looked at her, the corners of his lips turned upwards, and slowly let go. Hermione blinked dazedly, 'Is that a smile?' She felt fuzzy and drained as she lazily stared into the deep pools of Snape's penetrating eyes. Their attention was brought back by the Headmaster's peaceful voice.  
  
"Let us never forget this evening or the feelings of love and power it has brought." He finished and glanced at Severus and Hermione.  
  
Snape noticed that look Dumbledore had given him and arched an eyebrow. Then he noticed Hermione was breathing heavily and.to tell the truth she really didn't look all that well. Her body was not ready for the extreme amounts of energy that had surged through her being. He turned to her.  
  
"Are you tired?" he asked carefully. She nodded a bit. "Would you like to go back to the infirmary?"  
  
"No, I'd like to go back to my rooms, actually. I think I can manage, though, thank you," she said weakly. She started to go to the doorway, nodding goodbyes to those around her when she swayed lightly. Snape was there quick as a flash and had his arms around her waist balancing her. Poppy rushed over to them to inspect Hermione.  
  
"Yes dear, you had better go on up to your rooms. Severus, would you see that she makes it there safely? And Hermione dear, you would do well with a Sleeping Draught." She said kindly. Snape nodded, while Hermione looked utterly humiliated.  
  
He quietly led her out of the Great Hall, and placed his hand under her elbow to steady her as they climbed the staircase.  
  
"Where exactly are your rooms Miss Granger?" The fact that she had rooms at the castle suddenly made him feel better.  
  
"Gryffindor Tower," she said quietly concentrating on not tripping on the hem of her dress as they continued to climb the stairs; just what she would need, another embarrassing situation.  
  
He snorted, "Of course." There was a tense silence for a few moments while they walked, so he tried to initiate conversation. "So, did you enjoy yourself this evening? You must feel better being out of the Hospital Wing." His voice was bouncing off the stone walls of the empty corridor.  
  
"It was a nice change of scenery. And that spell was.interesting. I'd never heard of it before tonight. Have you ever done it before?"  
  
"I had heard of it, but no, I've not actually ever participated in that particular spell." She lightly stumbled and he steadied her, catching a whiff of her scent. 'Damn but she smells good too.' Being a Potions master had finely tuned most of his senses, including his sense of smell. Everyone had their own unique scent, which sometimes was a bad thing. Especially when you got a room full of hormonal boys gathered together. But other times it was very nice, most notably when he was around Hermione. Her scent completely drove him crazy- honeysuckle with underlying hints of citrus.  
  
Hermione slowly led them to a portrait of a young Renaissance-style woman in a blue dress leaning over a book, reading by candlelight. Snape thought it oddly appropriate and waited for Hermione to give the password. The young woman in the painting smiled and once the portrait swung open she found herself offering to invite him in, which at the last second he agreed to. It had surprised both of them actually.  
  
He stepped inside and much to Snape's chagrin the entryway and living room was done up in Gryffindor colours, but not to the extreme. She walked over to a large squashy armchair and offered Snape one as well. He politely waited until she had sat down before he sat as well. Despite the fact that she hadn't been in them long, the rooms still had that nice warm, lived in quality to them. They were rather comfortable.  
  
"Would you like some tea?" she asked timidly.  
  
"Certainly." Knowing she was tired he offered to summon up a tray. "May I?" he asked, she nodded. Snape then conjured up a set of tea and scones. He poured them both some tea and offered milk to Hermione. She poured a bit in and quietly sipped at it, unnervingly aware of how terribly quiet the room was.  
  
"So.did you enjoy tonight?" she asked nervously chewing her bottom lip, hoping to break the uncomfortable silence.  
  
He looked at her calmly, his eyes exposing a warm glint. "Yes, for once I did. I otherwise would have been spending it in my rooms poring over some new Potions journals." He lied. He knew damn well he probably would have spent it getting pissed.  
  
"Oh. Which journals do you subscribe to?" Hermione also had a few she regularly read.  
  
"Potions Today, Modern Elixers, and Ars Alchemica. Do you know any of them?" he asked interestedly.  
  
"Yes. I also have subscriptions to Potions Today, and Ars Alchemica."  
  
He looked faintly bemused. "I didn't realize you were still interested in the subject." She nodded.  
  
"I still enjoy working with potions, though I rarely get to. Plus I like to be up-to-date with any new discoveries. I've even seen a few articles written by you. I thought they were rather interesting. Particularly interesting was your article about your stand on the uses of that new invisibility potion. I had never thought about it in that way, it really was intriguing. I had only thought that it would be quite useful if carefully monitored." As she was speaking these words she felt herself calm down, in familiar territory. She also knew he could respond intelligently and that they could carry on very interesting conversations. She felt almost excited to talk to him. Before the war, she had had some very fascinating discussions with him, mostly about literature and science. Still, it was more than what she got out of anyone else and she really enjoyed talking to him.  
  
He inclined his head slightly. "And what did you think about that particular piece? I had wanted to voice my opinion about it for so long. Especially after having listened to inexperienced fools making claims about an area of research, they had no idea about, for months. Do not ask a celebrity their opinions on anything of value."  
  
She softly laughed. "Well, I imagined that if the potion were correctly made it wouldn't have such awful side-effects," she saw his eyes widen about to respond when she hurried on, "of course, any potion can have awful side effects if administered wrong also." He relaxed and steepled his fingers waiting for her to continue. "And then, there was your opinion that it should be an illegal substance. But, Invisibility Cloaks are not illegal, so why should the potion be?"  
  
He met her gaze coolly and explained. "Well, as you mentioned, it can do serious bodily harm if made and/or administered wrong. You could lose sight of a particular area of the body, or even lose it if the dosage is too highly concentrated. If that is the case then vital organs could disappear and people could go blind, deaf, mute or even die from it. Although, those who die would most likely deserve to if they're foolish enough to not measure extreme caution when using such a potentially dangerous substance," he added only half kidding. "And with an Invisibility Cloak there is always the possibility that if they are not careful, they could be exposed. With a potion, they are more likely not to be caught. Plus, the cloaks are so rare and expensive that not many people have them, so trouble is not commonly caused because of them, whereas a potion could be sold in stock and given to almost anyone. And think what could happen if that potion were damaged."  
  
She started to understand now and couldn't believe she hadn't thought about that already. She supposed she was just so excited to have access to such a substance. Trust someone like Severus Snape to find the bad in it.  
  
"Don't get me wrong," he continued, "I think it is an extraordinary finding. I just think it should be dealt with in caution. Potions are very delicate creations." He looked thoughtful for a moment.  
  
"What?" she asked smiling.  
  
He returned his gaze to her. "Oh it's nothing. I was just thinking how true that statement is. You wouldn't believe how many times I came near to poisoning my younger brother trying to create or make potions in my childhood. Well, older childhood. Father didn't like the idea of a nine year old playing with toxins." The thought of a nine year old Severus playing with potions in a lab made her giggle- it sounded so typical.  
  
"I didn't realize you had a brother. How much younger is he?" She smiled, curious as to what sort of family the Potions master came from.  
  
"Two. I had two other brothers. The youngest is Launce. I'm five years older than him. My older brother, Devon, was seven years my senior. However, he passed away when I was eight." His face grew dark and he looked away. She felt sympathy for him. Clearly it was a touchy subject, and she could relate.  
  
"I'm very sorry." She paused then tried to lighten the mood a bit. "I never had any siblings, but I always wanted a sister," she smiled.  
  
He brought his gaze back to her and frowned. "No. You don't, trust me. I have two of those as well. My life has been harder for it I assure you," he said that, but didn't put much feeling into it.  
  
Hermione's eyes widened. "Goodness. Quite a large family you have, then. What are their names?"  
  
He studied her quietly for a moment.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry. It's none of my business," she said chastened.  
  
He grinned- she was so easy to unnerve. "No no, it's quite alright. Not many people know I have such a large family. My oldest sister, Lavinia, is two years younger than me, and the baby of the family, after Launce, is Amerigin. She's the more.shall I say, 'free spirited' of the family?" He chuckled quietly. "She fancies herself a poet and a romantic and goes off on wild expeditions and trips. Father was so proud of that wild spark she had; Mother tended to feel more conservative about her actions, but nonetheless tried not to voice her opinions about them. Oddly enough, Amerigin's name means poet. So did Devon's. He was an intense boy as well. My father urged the arts and literature on us while we grew up. Mother encouraged it, but wasn't as passionate about them as our father. She was more into business affairs. Her family members are very wealthy antique furniture and artifact traders. They deal with the 'high society tycoons' of Europe." He said this rolling his eyes.  
  
"Your sister sounds very interesting. Are you close?" she said tucking her feet under her, soaking up all this wonderful new information about him.  
  
"On a more childish level, or as childish as I'm willing to go, we are close. However, even though I admire my baby sister's passion, I think she needs to settle down and do something constructive."  
  
"Well, maybe she feels it is constructive? As long as she's happy." Hermione couldn't help but sometimes wish she could be that way. "What about your other sister, Lavinia?"  
  
"Vinia or Vinnie as Amerigin calls her, which annoys her to no end," he added grinning, "was the more practical of the two. They did their sisterly thing I suppose, but they aren't very close. Vinia is more like Mother. As soon as she graduated from University she married a French wine connoisseur's son, who is exactly like her. His family owns a large vineyard just outside of Paris. They have two children, a boy and a girl. The little girl was a bit of a surprise, but both of them were born late. I think Merrin is seven now. I haven't seen them in awhile come to think of it. And they're incredibly smart. Her and her older brother Tristan, he's eleven, may well rival their uncle in intellect one day," he said almost smugly. Hermione grinned; it was almost unbelievable to think of Severus as a gloating uncle to someone's children. Her mind started, 'Did I just call him Severus?'  
  
"Does Tristan go to Hogwarts?"  
  
"No, they live in Paris and he attends Beauxbatons, and I suspect Merrin will as well. However, I believe Launce's sons will attend Hogwarts in a couple more years. He has twins, Elyot and Elijah."  
  
"So Launce has twin sons. Does your family generally have twins or is it on their mother's side."  
  
"No, Mother is a twin. Well, I suppose Launce's wife, Morgan, could carry the gene, I don't really know. I also have not seen them in awhile. The war kept me rather busy. Plus, I don't visit them regularly. There are.family differences." He looked almost sad. Hermione's heart hitched painfully for him.  
  
"I hope everything will be alright." she desperately wanted to know if it was about him or his being an ex Death-Eater, and if they knew what a good man he really was, but she didn't want him to feel she was prying.  
  
"Oh, for the most part it is." Feeling the conversation was on shaky ground, he switched back to his family's story. "Anyways, Launce and Amerigin were rather close, being the youngest of the family. I studied quite a bit with Lavinia, she's rather smart herself, but I was fairly close to Launce. Plus, Vinia and I used him as our test subject most of the time," he said with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Hermione laughed.  
  
"I bet you were perfectly evil." His grin widened and he nodded. She wished she could see what kind of little boy he had been. Was he a quiet child? Well, when he wasn't poisoning his brother. And what happened to make him turn out the way he was? It sounded like it was a basically normal family. She was almost certain from the way he had acted when he mentioned his brother that it had something to do with that.  
  
"I admit I had a hand in the pre-mature graying of my parents' hair." He snickered. "No, my siblings and I weren't that bad. As Snape's we were expected to uphold the family name with dignity and all that. Most frustrating for Amerigin I assure you." She laughed and stared down into her now cold tea. There were so many questions running through her mind.  
  
Hermione yawned as the clock struck midnight. Getting up, Snape felt guilty for keeping her up later than he should have. He too felt a little tired, but he didn't care. He thought he could go on talking to her forever without sleeping. Hermione also cursed her body; her mind wasn't ready to go to sleep yet either. She too stood up to walk Snape to the door.  
  
"Oh yes, I'm supposed to see to it that you take that Sleeping Draught," he said turning around grinning coyly. She arched an eyebrow, which he emulated, causing her to smile again. He was quickly learning to love that smile, being the one she was smiling at.  
  
"Actually, I think I used up what little Poppy gave me last night," she said a little sheepishly. He blinked.  
  
"Well. I am a Potions master am I not? What good would I be if I didn't have any on store? I'll bring you some, would you mind waiting for a few minutes while I go get a it?"  
  
"Not at all," she smiled  
  
"It'll be just a moment then." And with that he swept off down the corridor and down the many stairs to the dungeons. He realized how fast he was walking and stopped, straightened then resumed a forced slower pace. Once at his rooms he went into his lab, and shrunk a few bottles of the Sleeping Draught and placed them in his pocket. He turned back to the main door when something caught his eye and he sighed. Turning back, he decided it was time to give something back to Hermione.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Hermione was anxiously walking by the door. It was ridiculous; he'd only been gone a few minutes and he was coming right back. 'But then I have to sleep.' she thought unfairly. She had really enjoyed his company tonight. She had gotten to see past his defenses and saw how very pleasant he could be. If you could describe Severus Snape as pleasant anyhow. She smirked and started to run her fingers through her hair, but remembered it was done up. She walked over to the little mirror on the wall by the door, and removed the golden clasp that had been binding her hair all evening. She ran her fingers through her chocolate curls and shook them loose.  
  
"Hm, not bad Granger. Kind of like a forest nymph." She rolled her eyes and then a knock sounded at the door. She straightened and turned towards it smiling.  
  
"Back so soon-"she stopped, her eyes widening. "Crookshanks!!" The cat leapt excitedly from Severus' arms and mewing furiously at Hermione. She was hugging and kissing him, cuddling him tightly as her familiar purred and nuzzled, obviously very happy to see his Mistress. Snape watched with a mixture of feelings; he was glad she had her cat back, but he almost felt jealous at being dismissed so easily by the animal he had come to enjoy.  
  
'Ridiculus.' he thought. Then he noticed she had done something to her hair. His own eyes widened slightly and his jaw dropped a fraction of an inch; she looked like a goddess straight out of a Greek epic. Her long curls were trailing down her back and falling around her face with a soft messy look to them. He had to take a step back, afraid the urge to grab her and kiss her senseless would become too strong. He licked his lips and closed his mouth.  
  
"I uh, I've been forgetting to return him to you. He's quite an annoying house guest," he lied. Crookshanks looked at him as if to say, 'Oh please.' Hermione quirked her eyebrow again, still smiling.  
  
"You've had him all this time?! Oh, I'm sorry if he was a burden. He's a little high-strung, but all around a good boy- aren't you Crookshanks," she cooed.  
  
"So that's his name. No one at the castle knew it; I've been calling him cat. I've taken good care of him so don't worry about that." At this the cat jumped from Hermione's arms and rubbed up against Snape's legs. Hermione's jaw dropped in shock- he never acted like that around men! Snape gave in and smiling, stooped down to rub Crookshanks' head, the cat's purring increased ten-fold.  
  
"Ok, so you weren't that annoying. But I suppose it isn't your fault with a name like that." the cat playfully nipped his finger and Hermione huffed. He grinned at her mock annoyance- a grin she absolutely melted from- and stood up reaching into his pockets. "Here's the draught, I brought a few extra bottles should you need them. Will that be enough?"  
  
"I'm sure it will, but if not I can brew some more," she said politely looking into his eyes. "Thank you." He met her gaze and nodded.  
  
"Anytime," he said quietly. They stared at each other for a few moments before Crookshanks mewed- he hadn't had dinner yet.  
  
Snape clumsily shook his head and glared down at the cat. "Oh, he might be hungry."  
  
"Oh, yes. Alright. I'm sure I can find him something.even though he is a cat and can very well catch his own meal," she said frowning at her familiar. The cat simply went back to rubbing against Snape's shins.  
  
"Well, I'll leave you alone then. You need your rest. Goodnight Miss Granger."  
  
"Hermione. Goodnight professor." she said quietly.  
  
"Severus. And goodnight..Hermione." She suddenly realized she loved the way he said her name. They stared at each other again, before Snape cleared his throat, nodded, and turned down the hall and to the dungeons once again.  
  
Hermione stood looking at her doorway until he was gone, when she slowly shut it and leaned her forehead against the door sighing loudly. Crookshanks twined himself around her ankles. She peered down at him.  
  
"Oh alright!" and she turned towards the little kitchen in her rooms to find something he could eat, thinking she really had better take that Sleeping Draught- otherwise there was no way in hell she'd be able to shut her mind off tonight.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Yay, that was fun. Tee. My thanks to Kel, Lenea, and Gam for beta'ing. I am lost without them. And THANK YOU SO MUCH! To everyone who reviewed.  
  
And just to clear up for some of those: 1.) Yes, Ron is dead. =( and 2.) Yes, Harry is insane.... 3.) You just have to wait and see if Severus and Hermione hook up. =) Btw, did you all like Snape's family? I'll get deeper into that, and the deal with his brother soon enough, as well as the Weasley's. Btw, Compages- a joining together, connection/ and Expurgo- to cleanse , purify. All in Latin again. And, if Potion's Today, and Modern Elixer's is yours.forgive me. I thought I thought of them all myself, I swear I didn't copy.at least intentionally. However, Ars Alchemica is not my brainchild.that would be the title of KazVL's famously used Potions Journal. Btw, I would like to shamelessly promote her FABULOUS fic, Falling Further In. It's unbelievable, and definitely worth a read. Ok, I'm done bragging. Oh crap, no I fogot. The Appearance Detracting Charm..I'm not sure who's idea that came from.I think its in Falling Further In, but I've seen it in other fics as well. So whoever it belongs too if you find this then tell me and I'll be sure to give you credit. =D 


	9. Getting to Know You

~Touchstone~  
Chapter Nine  
  
By Gin  
  
***A/N: I've redone this chapter.  
  
Hermione awoke the next morning feeling better than she had in ages. She lay in her warm bed with a gentle morning breeze coming through and stretched luxuriously; at her feet Crookshanks purred loudly. She sat up and yawned; slipped her feet into the pair of fuzzy slippers Cerelia had bought for her, and trudged into the bathroom to take a quick shower. As she stepped under the hot jets of water she let the steam melt away any remaining tension. Lazily she remembered her late night chat with.Severus. It still felt bizarre to call him that but it felt good nonetheless. As she worked the shampoo in her hair she thought about how they had kept staring into each other's eyes last night and she closed hers. He had still been in the brown shirt and slacks.the shower felt a lot hotter suddenly.  
  
When she stepped out and finished her morning rituals she decided she would head down to breakfast. She felt much better, and her colouring even looked almost back to normal. Later she thought she might visit with Professor McGonagall if she wasn't busy. She pulled on a pair of white capris, a thin pale blue fitted shirt lined in antique lace, and a pair of white sandals and went to the door to go down to breakfast.  
  
As Hermione walked through the halls and down the stairs she reminisced about her own days at Hogwarts. Her fingers slid lightly over the banister and automatically she stepped over the trick step Neville used to always get caught in. She smiled thinking back to the time Harry told her that he had gotten caught in that same step and was almost caught by Snape after he'd been out trying to discover the secret of that egg for the Triwizard Tournament; then she abruptly frowned remembering Harry. She quietly pushed open the large doors to the Great Hall and walked over to the breakfast table. Minerva, Cerelia, Gamula and Lenea were all sitting at the table chatting amiably. They all looked up and smiled as Hermione took a seat between Minerva and Lenea.  
  
"You look much better this morning, my dear. Did you.get a good night's sleep?" the Transfiguration teacher asked with a wink. Hermione looked at her oddly, wondering why her former professor had winked, and slowly nodded.  
  
"I did.thank you. I think that ceremony really did the trick. I was tired at first, but I have a lot more energy this morning," she replied. After buttering a pancake and grabbing a couple sausages she looked around. "Am I late for breakfast?"  
  
"No," said Lenea. "In the summertime we come and go as we please. Usually we'll all have dinner together but that's about the extent of the 'schedule.'" Hermione nodded.  
  
"Where did you get that dress from last night Hermione? You looked very nice in it," asked Gamula while she buttered a bit of toast.  
  
"Thank you. Professors McGonagall and Sprout found it in Hogsmeade," she answered, blushing.  
  
"Think nothing of it dear. Call me Cerelia, or better yet, Ceri," said Sprout adding another spoonful of sugar to her coffee. "I had fun last night as well. We must do that again. Minerva, do you think you could get the old man to make that a yearly event?" she implored, smiling.  
  
"I'll see what I can do Ceri. By the way, I was thinking of going into Hogsmeade today as well, would anyone care to join me?" asked Minerva.  
  
"Oh! I'm in Minnie!" squeaked Cerelia and she looked at Madam Hooch.  
  
"That depends. How late are we coming back?"  
  
"Not until well after nightfall," McGonagall said dryly.  
  
"Well in that case, I'm in, too."  
  
The Deputy-Headmistress looked at Lenea and Hermione. "And what about you two? You're invited as well."  
  
Vector spoke up first, "You know I'd love to Minerva, but I'm meeting with Jack's lawyers today. We're finalizing everything. About damn time too." She added. She noticed Hermione's confused expression. "We're going through a divorce. I finally decided he was worthless and he could keep his other mistress'." The other women at the table giggled.  
  
"Oh, I'm very sorry Professor."  
  
"Don't be. He is though. But I'm not. Perhaps the next time we can celebrate ladies?"  
  
Gamula laughed. "I'll bring you some of Rosemerta's finest when we get back for a late nightcap, Lenea." The women laughed again. Hermione could not get this image of her former professors out of her mind.  
  
'Drunken and rowdy celebrating divorces..Merlin save us all,' she shook her head smiling.  
  
"And?" replied Minerva looking at Hermione.  
  
"Oh, I may have to pass tonight. I feel better, but Poppy told me not to push my luck." She really wasn't up to getting completely pissed just yet and somehow she didn't think they would just be having a "few drinks" tonight.  
  
The women groaned and Hooch added that Poppy would be right there with them, but Lenea patted Hermione's hand. "Next time then, dear. We'll all go out."  
  
"Deal."  
  
"Alright then. But just this once." Minerva took a sip of her tea. "What do you plan on doing today?"  
  
"I think I'm going to read a bit and relax. I thought about going for a walk later."  
  
"Oh that sounds lovely!" squeaked Cerelia. "You should do it this evening when it's not so hot. The flowers will be in full bloom; that's my favourite time," she chirped.  
  
"Yes we know about your evening rendezvous Ceri," prodded Hooch.  
  
"Oh quiet Gam! I haven't done that in years," she giggled. Hermione barely kept her jaw from flying open, especially when Gam added that she had, as the women laughed. Vector patted her hand comfortingly again and winked.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Severus Snape woke with a start. The sheets were soaking wet, his hair was matted to his forehead and his pulse was racing. He shakily lay back down, ran his fingers through his damp hair and caught his breath. He hadn't had that severe of a nightmare for a couple of weeks now. This one was particularly vivid and it had exposed some of his more horrific memories.and his brother. He felt sick. Weakly he staggered to the bathroom and retched. The porcelain felt cool against his fevered skin while he rested. He hadn't been thinking about any of his past deeds so he didn't exactly know why that dream had visited him. In fact, he had felt calm and relatively peaceful before he went to bed last night. He supposed that it was a taste of his usual luck; the past coming back to remind him that he was and will always be worthless. He groaned, lifting himself to his feet and over to the sink to splash cold water on his face then brush his teeth.  
  
When he was finished he slipped on a pair of black pyjama bottoms and flopped heavily onto the bed. Staring at the ceiling he wondered what time it was and dragged his gaze the clock above his small mantel. With a wave of his hand the faceplate illuminated so he could see the time in the dark. It glowed 5:34 am and, groaning, he rolled over and buried his face in his pillow. Soon the castle's occupants would be stirring and he would have to start another day. His dreams were coming back to him in little snippets and he blinked them away. He could hear random people in his life telling him he wouldn't amount to anything. Then he could hear the praises the Death-Eaters had given him telling him he could be anything he wanted. He had just wanted acceptance. He had never truly felt wanted, at least without some sort of cloud hanging above him.  
  
Sighing he rolled back over and stood up. Walking to his wardrobe he grabbed a breezy black chamber robe and his wand and slipped out his front door into the hallway. The temperature in the halls felt very pleasant to his skin as he let his robes flap open. He didn't bother putting on a shirt underneath; he didn't think anyone would even be awake yet or at least be out in the halls. Silently he walked in shadows through the castle. Even though it was very quiet and solitary, he loved roaming the hallways while everyone was asleep. The castle had always felt like home to him and he was never bothered by it. As he continued on some of the portraits woke up and watched him. He knew they watched him. People took them for granted; the people in the portraits had been around long enough to watch others over the years and they were very good judges of character. They weren't fooled by his seemingly innocent early morning stroll. They had seen him up wandering about during all hours of the night and knew when he was having one of his bad nights. It was actually one of the ways Albus gathered information on Severus. He'd ask the portraits if Severus had been up walking about again and they would always tell him whether it was a serious night or just a casual stroll and Snape was none the wiser.  
  
Tonight his wanderings were taking him up to the Astronomy Tower. He couldn't remember anything he had been thinking when he finally arrived at the top. He opened the wooden door to step out into the outside part of the turret and leaned against the wall folding his arms over his chest. The barest glimpse of light was just peeking over the horizon and the stars were slowly blinking out. Despite his dark mood the change of scenery soothed him. He could stand out on this tower and just stare at the grounds and the world around him for hours; in fact he'd done it several times, but mainly at night. There was a light breeze making the treetops of the Forbidden Forest sway rhythmically back and forth and play with the locks of Snape's hair. He inhaled deeply catching various scents of dew covered trees and grass, jasmine, and peppermint, probably from Albus' garden. His robe flapped open and he closed his eyes leaning his head against the cool stone of the tower. This was how he should live his life. He should stay alone and not drag anyone else into his miserable little pit of hell. Even though the war with Voldemort was over, it didn't mean his own personal war was. And besides, it would be dangerous to try to involve anyone else in his life. There were still Death -Eaters out there who had heard of Severus' return and his hand in the death of their leader. Those people would be out for Snape's blood and damn anyone who got in their way. He would spend the rest of his life looking over his shoulder- again. That was no way to live a life. He gazed back out over the landscape and sighed,  
"Thus let me live, unheard, unknown;   
  
Thus unlamented let me die;   
  
Steal from the world, and not a stone   
  
Tell where I lie."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Thank you very much Madam Pince, that's very kind of you." Hermione smiled at the librarian.  
  
The older woman smiled back. "Not at all. The library is all yours, not many people use it over the summer, except for Severus, but I'm sure you'll have no trouble. Feel free to do whatever you wish while I'm away. Oh, and have a lovely holiday Hermione," Madam Pince had always favoured Hermione over any of her other fellow students and was pleased to know her library would be getting some use while she was away for the summer. She turned and exited the room and left the castle, leaving Hermione alone.  
  
Hermione had come in here after breakfast to look for a few books for some light reading. She inhaled and smiled. She missed the familiar scent of her old sanctuary. The smell of old books, or even new ones always calmed her down no matter what problem she faced.  
  
She made her way over towards the Restricted Section and ran her fingers lovingly along some of the old spines. She glanced at the titles and selected Advanced Potions for Advanced Wizards then went back to her favourite table and began skimming through it. She had read about halfway through the book when a shadow suddenly loomed overhead and a deep voice spoke up.  
  
"Do you know what the phrase 'Get some rest,' means Miss Granger?"  
  
She calmly raised her head and smiled without looking behind her. "Hermione." The figure walked around her left and pulled out a chair.  
  
"Is anyone sitting here?" he asked.  
  
She grinned. "No, please sit down." She gestured to his chair. He sat and peered at the book she was reading.  
  
"Plan on doing a bit of brewing Hermione?" Snape asked sarcastically. She pursed her lips.  
  
"Maybe. I just came down here to do a little reading is all. What's it to you if I wanted to?" she mocked.  
  
He raised his eyebrows in response. "I would have nothing against it. That is, if you're sure you are able to still properly brew. You may need professional supervision after such a long time away from a potions lab."  
  
She straightened, "I am quite capable of brewing almost any potion you put before me Professor. Besides, every once and a while I am able to work with potions at my job. But even if I didn't I would still be able to do just as good, if not better, as I did when-" she stopped. He was grinning maliciously at her as realization dawned on her.  
  
"You set me up." She accused.  
  
He leaned back in his chair and crossed his fingers over his stomach. "Perhaps." She just shook her head.  
  
"What about you Severus? I thought Poppy told you to 'Get some rest' as well. You don't appear to be lounging around your quarters either." She chided.  
  
"I am not a prisoner of this castle. I come and go as I please." He thought for a moment then added, "Unless Albus tells me otherwise." Hermione giggled softly. "I too came in search of a book, although not just for 'light reading.'"  
  
"Well, I'm sorry I held you up." She joked.  
  
He sighed dramatically, "It happens." Then he abruptly stood and walked over to the Restricted Section as she had done earlier. He skimmed over the titles of a couple rows then deftly picked out a rather large and worn leather book then walked back over to Hermione's table. She looked at the book curiously then at him.  
  
"Psychological Curses and How to Cure Them." He said flatly. Hermione stared at him for a moment before looking away.  
  
"Do you think you can find a cure in there for him?" she asked quietly and went back to her own book.  
  
"No. But maybe I can find clues to help me find or make a different cure they haven't tried." She nodded.  
  
"You haven't told me what exactly is wrong with Harry." She said quietly.  
  
"No one really knows. All I remember was Voldemort touching Harry's cheek and him crying out. I had heard that Voldemort was trying to make a new curse that would render a person completely insane without the use of Crucio.but I wasn't privy to any other information as I was already suspected of being disloyal," he said rather dejectedly. Hermione just nodded staring blankly at her book.  
  
He sat studying her profile for a few minutes noticing her chewing her bottom lip and her eyes not moving over the pages before he made to get up when she spoke.  
  
"Why are you trying to help him? He's not your responsibility."  
  
He stayed quiet thinking about that before replying softly. "To repay a debt." Then he quietly got up and walked out of the library leaving Hermione to her thoughts.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Hermione spent the rest of the day wandering around the castle, poking her head in various classrooms she used to sit in. She went up to the Owlery, the Astronomy Tower, and made a point to avoid the North Tower where Professor Trelawny's room had been. She ran into Vector around lunch time and decided to eat with her before the teacher left for London, and listen to some of her classroom tales. After Hermione had left the number of students in her class had actually increased, much to the Arithmancy teacher's enjoyment. Afterwards as she was walking back to her rooms at Gryffindor Tower she noticed a huge shape walking by the lake. She smiled and turned to go back out the great front doors.  
  
The sticky heat was almost unbearable as she made her way across the lawn. Hagrid was carrying two dead pheasants in his huge hand and Fang was playfully bounding at his heels. The dog then looked up, sniffed, and with a rumbling howl set off in Hermione's direction. She smiled and braced herself for the impending weight of the Boarhound. Hagrid's booming voice called out for Fang but the dog was too excited to care and he leapt up on Hermione licking her in the face. She struggled with the dog and turned her head left and right to escape the slobbery kisses until Hagrid came up and pulled the great beast off her.  
  
"Hermione!" he cried pulling her into a bear hug. "Look at ya! Ya look jus' great you do. Bin wonderin' when you were gonna come down ter see me. Fang's happy to, as you can see." He said beaming down at her. She smiled up at the half-giant.  
  
"Thanks Hagrid. Want some company?" The huge groundskeeper almost cried with happiness as he led her to his little hut on the centre of the grounds. It had been years since he'd been able to simply visit with any of "his kids" as he called them.  
  
"Well o' course Hermione. Never too busy for you. How're you feelin' by the way?" and he opened the door to his hut, Fang wiggling happily by, and set out to make tea and some of his infamous "Rock Cakes."  
  
~*~*~  
  
By the time Hermione had left Hagrid's it was three o' clock. She had thoroughly enjoyed visiting with him. He was telling her about a new trio at Hogwarts who almost could have given her, Harry, and Ron a run for their money. The thought was painful but funny too and she had smiled. She noticed Hagrid was careful to keep the conversation to the school and Hermione's job without trying to lead it back to the past and she was very grateful.  
  
As she was walking back up the hill she heard the faint sound of women cackling and she picked up her pace to see who it was. Minerva and company were all heading into Hogsmeade and apparently having fun already. She shook her head smiling and walked up the steps to the entrance. Looking off to the East she noticed dark clouds were gathering and hoped it would cool off soon. When she opened the front doors, she stood in the entrance hall wondering what do to next. It was still a bit too hot to take that walk she had planned on, and she wasn't in the right mood to read.  
  
'That's a first,' she thought. So she turned left and headed down the stairs to the dungeons. It was a bit cooler down in these halls as she made her way to Snape's office. But as she approached his door she heard raised voices and slowed up a bit to listen.  
  
"I can't believe you didn't owl us Severus! That was so inconsiderate. Even for you!" A man's voice. She couldn't tell if he was younger or older.  
  
"What difference does it make? As you can see it is obviously not true then isn't it?" came Snape's harsher voice.  
  
"Difference?! Amerigin was in tears last night when she heard! She burst through my front door asking if I'd heard. Then she went Mother's. You have no idea what state we were all in last night-"  
  
"Well judging from the apparent fact that you're here today instead of last night, obviously it wasn't that big of a deal, Launce." Snape was losing his temper.  
  
"Well, Gin and I wanted to, but the rest of them said Dumbledore probably would have sent word if something had happened to you.but still Severus. You should have told us what was going on. We didn't even know if you were hurt from the war." The other man ended quietly. Hermione edged closer to the doorway of Snape's classroom. She felt a bit childish at hiding and listening to Severus' conversation but she quickly set that thought aside.  
  
"Again, something that could have easily been remedied had you honestly cared. Is there anything else? Or have you just come to yell at me and tell me what a prat I am?"  
  
There was a pause before the other man began again. "For gods' sake Severus. We thought you were dead. We were worried, and before you protest your point of view, yes we were worried. I just wanted to come and see." The area of the other man's voice changed position, as if he was pacing. "And while I'm here, you bloody bat, you do realize Mother's birthday is coming up soon don't you?" There was a pause and he continued. "Lavinia has decided to throw her a little party back at home. You're invited you know." He ended jokingly.  
  
"Oh thank the gods for that. I'm sure she'd be just thrilled to see me. Why on earth would I want to attend?" There was a scuffle sound and Hermione started. "Stop it. I thought you were an adult Launce." the other man laughed at Snape's remark.  
  
"Well, maybe we want you to come? You haven't seen the boys in over a year. You'll be surprised how much they've grown. And Vin's bringing her kids too. It'll be the first time since we've all been together-"  
  
"This is asking for trouble Launce. You know exactly what will happen if we all get together. You'd be better off without me. I'll send a gift." Snape said flatly.  
  
"How thoughtful," echoed the other man, and then sighed. "Well, at least promise me you'll consider it. Amerigin is actually staying with us for a bit and she's excited to see you. She's too embarrassed to come back here after what happened the last time." Hermione thought she heard Snape chuckle.  
  
"And she should be. Serves her right." said Snape. The other man chuckled as well.  
  
"Well, old man. I think I had better get back home or Morgan will have my head. We're supposed to go 'birthday shopping,'" the other man presumably imitating his wife's voice.  
  
"Whipped!" coughed Snape. Hermione almost burst out laughing at Snape's jibe. She had to bite her tongue to stifle the giggles. "And who are you calling old?" he scoffed.  
  
"You. And whatever; she knows who's top dog." Launce said laughingly. "And don't you talk to me about relationships either Potions master," he said darkly. Hermione could just see Snape's raised eyebrow. Then she heard them walking towards the door. She quickly turned around and ran a few steps back the opposite way to appear as if she were just coming down the hall.  
  
Snape and an almost double with short hair came out of the doorway. Hermione stopped wide-eyed. He looked almost exactly like Severus, only his appearance wasn't quite as dark, his skin was much tanner, and his eyes were blue. His hair was stylishly cropped shorter and he was a couple of inches shorter than him. It was definitely apparent that these two men were brothers. The younger sibling wore a white polo shirt and beige Dockers and raised his eyebrows at Hermione. Snape also mimicked his brother's expression and looked at Hermione.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry to bother you Severus. I didn't realize you had company." She nervously turned around as if to leave but he stopped her.  
  
"It's fine. I'd like you to meet someone." She turned back around and politely smiled. "Hermione, this is my younger brother Launce. Launce, this is a friend and former student of mine, Hermione Granger. You remember me telling you about him Hermione?" he asked. She nodded and extended her hand as Launce raised an eyebrow at Snape and extended his in greeting.  
  
"Hello," he said brightly. "Launce Snape. Pleasure to meet you Miss Granger."  
  
"Oh, please call me Hermione."  
  
"Very well," he said in a voice strikingly like his older brother, though not quite as deep. "Granger.not the Granger girl who works at the Ministry in the Magical Innovations Department?" he asked interestedly. Hermione blinked.  
  
"Launce also works at the Ministry. If he's heard of you and he's not angry, then it's probably a good thing," Snape said. Launce grinned and narrowed his eyes at his brother.  
  
"I can't help the fact that the Ministry is infested with idiots." He turned his attention back to Hermione. "But, he is right. I've heard many wonderful compliments about you Hermione. Very impressed I must say." Hermione blushed at the compliment and thanked him.  
  
"I was just walking him to the gates. Would you care to join us?" Severus asked.  
  
"Oh, I wouldn't want to bother you," she thought she might intrude and it looked like they were having a relatively peaceful conversation now. She remembered Severus telling her about their, "family differences," and she wanted them to have their time alone.  
  
"Nonsense Miss Granger, I insist." Replied Launce. "I would be delighted to meet a former student of Severus'." He said as they walked towards the staircase to the main floor. "I've heard he's a real hard-ass." He smirked. Hermione noticed Severus cunningly trip Launce and stifled another giggle.  
  
"So tactful of you Severus," growled Launce.  
  
As they made their way to the oak front doors Albus called from above.  
  
"Is that Launce Snape I see before me?" he called. Launce straightened and turned around smiling.  
  
"It would be the one and only. Surely that's not the great Albus Dumbledore is it?" Severus whispered "Brown-noser," and winked at Hermione. She was really enjoying seeing this side of him.  
  
Dumbledore reached out a hand as he was descending the marble staircase to the younger man. "Indeed it would be." They shook hands vigorously. "It has been a long time Mr. Snape. How is the family?"  
  
"They're just fine Headmaster, thank you for asking."  
  
"When will be seeing the boys then?" Launce's eyes gleamed.  
  
"In about two more years. They're extremely excited. We all are. I've been filling their heads with tales of when I was a school-boy. Morgan is about to kill me," the group chuckled.  
  
"You should send them up for a visit then," said Dumbledore. "I'm sure they'd enjoy seeing their Uncle Severus?" he said beaming at his Potions master. Snape quirked an eyebrow and Launce grinned evilly.  
  
"Well, perhaps that can be arranged," he said turning towards Severus, who made a warning sound low in his throat.  
  
Dumbledore smiled and turned back to Launce. "Well, I'll not keep you; I was just on my way to London." Severus looked at him questioningly.  
  
"Oh, don't worry about it my boy, you enjoy your company." Severus blinked.  
  
"I was just leaving Headmaster. Care to join my parting group?" Launce teased.  
  
"Well, if it's no trouble. By the way, hello Miss Granger. You're looking excellent this afternoon," Albus smiled.  
  
"Thank you Professor."  
  
"I hope you haven't been ill Miss Granger," replied Launce turning to Hermione. Hermione absently wondered what it was with the Snape men that make them always call her 'Miss Granger.'  
  
"It is passing I think. Thank you." Severus and Dumbledore both looked at Hermione and she suddenly studied her feet. Launce, sensing an awkward situation, turned the attention back to him.  
  
"Well then, shall we? I mustn't be late for the wife," he said looking pointedly at the Headmaster.  
  
"Oh, I see. Then let's not tarry. Lead the way Severus."  
  
Snape did so, and the group talked pleasantly until they reached the gates, Snape not forgetting to leave out how insufferable a student Hermione was. She huffed, but Albus came to her rescue saying she was an absolute delight and an extraordinarily brilliant witch. They reached the gate and Albus bade goodbye and Apparated away. Launce again took Hermione's hand and grinning boyishly said it had been a pleasure. He turned back to Severus and offered his hand again.  
  
"I do hope you'll seriously re-consider, Severus. I'll personally threaten the family into behaving," He said with a smile. Severus just looked at him.  
  
"You shouldn't have to." Launce looked at him sadly. "Go on; give my love to Morgan and the children." The younger brother nodded and with a final glance Apparated as well.  
  
They stood in silence for a few moments before Snape spoke up. "And that's Launce." Hermione grinned.  
  
"I thought he was positively charming. A step up I'd say," she said playfully. He narrowed his eyes and gave her a mock-scowl.  
  
"Then you can walk back alone," he said and turned to go back to the castle. She quickly caught up with him.  
  
"I'm sorry, did you need something earlier?" he replied looking at the darkening clouds.  
  
"Hm?" she said looking up also. "Oh, I was just bored killing time until I took a walk and wanted to see what you were doing. Nothing important, really," she replied.  
  
"And now?" he said looking at her.  
  
"Well, those clouds have certainly cooled the temperature. I think I'll take that walk." She said looking at him. "Would you care to join me?" He stopped and looked down at her, considering.  
  
'It's just a harmless walk,' he thought, then "Very well." He offered his arm which she gladly took and they set off towards the edge of the Forbidden Forest. She asked Snape about his memories of his younger brother and laughed at some of them. Apparently, Launce was quite the charmer, which got him into some very sticky situations back in school. She decided she very much liked him so far. Then they talked about the book Hermione had been reading and about some of the potions she hadn't made in years, and she confessed her "accident" in her second year.  
  
"Yes, I know all about that." He said smirking. "Poppy told me. I even snuck in to see you when you were asleep while Poppy was gone. It was very hard not to laugh so I had to leave quickly," he goaded. She slapped him on the arm.  
  
"Then why didn't you take off points?" she asked.  
  
"Well, two reasons. First, I was secretly impressed that a second year would even attempt, let alone be quite as successful as you were in making the Polyjuice Potion. Well, you weren't completely successful were you? And secondly, I think your mistake was punishment enough. And quite comical at that." He got another slap on the arm.  
  
They slowly made their way to the gardens with the smell of roses and honeysuckle filling the air. The storm clouds were getting thicker and soon they would have to go in. They walked in companionable silence and stopped at the fountain. There were small goldfish swimming in the tiny pool and blooming purple blossomed lily pads covering half the small pond. Snape noticed her face was tinged pink from the sun and thought she must have spent more time outside than just now. It was almost cute, if he could have brought himself to think it. And if he admitted it, he had had a very nice time walking with her.  
  
She smiled up at him. "What are you looking at?" she asked curiously. He blinked and looked away from her.  
  
"Nothing."  
  
She raised an eyebrow.  
  
"You have a spot on your nose." She quickly wiped at her nose. After a second his lips quirked and he turned around looking upward smiling and said, "You're so easy to fool, Hermione." She tutted behind him.  
  
"Is that all you do? Try to annoy people?" she asked haughtily.  
  
"Most of the time," he said still gazing at the clouds. "Do you like the rain?"  
  
Hermione blinked, caught off-guard. She looked upwards then at him and replied. "Yes actually. Do you?"  
  
"Mm," he nodded. She studied his profile against the clouds. "When I was younger I used to go outside during thunderstorms and watch the rain. I loved it. My mother would get so angry at me," he chuckled. Whether it was out of his stupidity or worry he never knew. "Sometimes my father would sit on the porch outside with us and listen to the rain. It was very comforting." He then realized how sad that was. That such dreary weather made him happy. He furrowed his brows and looked back down to Hermione. It was starting to sprinkle and she looked around to see if there were rain drops or her imagination.  
  
"We'd better get inside before we get soaked. Minerva will yell at me if I track mud in," he said sarcastically. She smiled at his joke and once again took up his arm. She was thinking about his comment about the rain. They walked back to the front of the castle, instead of taking the side door Severus knew was there, in silence. Once inside Severus rubbed his stomach.  
  
"Are you hungry?" he asked.  
  
"I could eat. Hagrid's cauldron cakes weren't the exact mid-afternoon snack I had hoped for," and Snape winced. He'd had the misfortune of trying some of Hagrid's cooking before at a Staff meeting once.  
  
"Maybe someone will be there," and they turned right and went into the Great Hall. Rain drops were falling from the clouded ceiling stopping just a few feet above their heads as they made their way to the smaller dinner table. Snape pulled out her chair for her, common courtesy, and sat down beside her. No one else was in the Great Hall however, so they ordered their meals and chatted companionably during the rest of dinner.  
  
After dinner they went back down to Snape's office and Hermione began asking him questions about Harry's condition and if he knew anything else about it. She wanted to do some research and try to help. Snape thought it could be the thing to perk her back up completely, but was worried that if it didn't work she'd go right back into depression, and nonetheless began telling her some libraries and people he knew of who could help her if she wanted. An hour later he was pouring them some brandy and sat back in the chairs Hermione had transfigured, (she said the ones he had were much too uncomfortable) and talked. He mentioned there was a new student last year who could have been Neville Longbottom's twin. He kept saying how fortunate his years had been once Hermione had graduated. But now not only was there a new walking Potions-disaster, there were "three more meddlesome young Gryffindor's who could very well have been the Wonder-Trio re-incarnated."  
  
"Yes, Hagrid said something about that," she laughed.  
  
Snape sat in the chair next to her, having chosen that one instead of the chair behind his desk, and thought. Hermione was staring into her glass. He knew he shouldn't be here with her like this. He knew she knew what he had said to her back in her mind when she was gone, but after thinking it over early that morning, it might be better just to help her start her life over- without him. And being here with her tonight was not helping his resolve at all. She kept running into him, and staying near him. It was very frustrating, but he couldn't help it. He enjoyed her company.  
  
Hermione finally looked up from her glass of brandy, which was excellent, and noticed him staring off into space.  
  
"Is everything all right Severus?" she asked worriedly.  
  
He looked back at her and set his glass down. "Yes. I'm just tired." She nodded.  
  
After a few more minutes of silence she decided she should probably leave. Thankfully she made to leave first and he got up to walk her back through the door of his office and through the classroom out to the hall. She stood awkwardly before him thinking of something to say.  
  
"Well, goodnight," Severus said and not wanting to have to look at her any more than what he could take began closing the door.  
  
"Wait," she called. He stopped and slowly looked back into her eyes. There was concern mixed with a little bit of hurt there.  
  
"Yes?" he said dryly.  
  
"I just.wanted to say thank you." He cocked his head to the side. "For spending the day with me. I enjoyed your company." 'Ugh, you're so bad at this Granger.' She thought.  
  
He blinked at her and slowly nodded. "You're welcome." The urge to offer to walk her back to her rooms was almost overpowering, so it took all his willpower to tell her goodnight again and shut the door softly. He leaned back into the heavy wooden door and hung his head. She stood outside in the hall looking after the door for a moment before she turned and walked back up to her rooms.  
  
"Well that was odd." She said once back in her rooms and walked over to the fireplace to call for Crookshanks' dinner. The cat hopped off his place at the seat in the bay window and twined about her ankles purring. She bent over and picked him up, hugging him. The cat jumped out of her arms when his food arrived and Hermione went into the bedroom to slip on her nightgown and slide into bed. The rain was gently pattering on her window and rolls of thunder sounded overhead. Sometime in the night Crookshanks began mewing loudly to get out, and Hermione got up to go to him. She was slightly miffed at his intrusion of her dreams (which had a certain tall, dark, and brooding figure in them) and quickly charmed an invisible cat door into the side of the wall and went back to sleep.  
  
Fifteen minutes later found the ginger feline slipping through another, forgotten, cat door down in the dungeons. The man he had come to see was lying in a cold sweat, breathing irregularly in bed when the cat lightly jumped up and began kneading the man's shoulders with his paws, purring. This action unconsciously seemed to ease the troubled man's dreams and he slept a bit more peacefully that night with her familiar close beside him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: Okay, okay!! I know I said there'd be some action this chapter, and I know I said you'd see a Weasley..=( I'm sorry! I just didn't feel it was time. But!!! But but but, I swear I'm going to get that in next. If I were to have added them this time, it would have been a really long chapter. Enough to put schnoogle's chapter lengths to shame. Heh. Anyways, what did you think? This is a kind of slower chapter, letting them get more time in to get to know each other. And I like Launce, do you guys? Let me know. And I "borrowed" the idea of an invisible cat door (which makes perfect sense, come on) from a wonderful fic entitled "The Fortress Within" by Idamae. It's nice. Yes.  
  
Thank you my pretty betas!: Lenea, Gam and Kel!  
  
Thanks to these beautiful people!!: Slytherin Sweetie(you are such a cool person!), Strawberry Sweetie(thanks girl!), Stellar Snape(always a pleasure to have you review. =D), artymys(stay tuned, I swear the Weasley's are close), Be Cunning(thanks dear), LunaWriter(hello again, glad you changed your mind =P ),OzRatbag2(that was very kind of you to say heh), candledot(thank you for that!! *blush*) I think that's everyone who reviewed for chapter eight.yes. =D Oh yes, Lenea even reviewed for me. Bless her. 333!!  
  
Ode on Solitude  
  
Thus let me live, unheard, unknown;   
  
Thus unlamented let me die;   
  
Steal from the world, and not a stone   
  
Tell where I lie. ~ Alexander Pope (1688-1744) 


	10. Absinthe Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

~Touchstone~  
Chapter Ten  
  
By Gin  
  
The next few days flew by in a flurry. Hermione spent them owling libraries and the people Severus had mentioned she should try to ask for help. They had all owled back with books and information and all of them stating that St. Mungo's had contacted them and they'd given them the same information they had to her. At this, her determination had faltered, but she quickly ignored that initial let down and pressed on in her own way. This was what she did. Improved on things someone else had achieved or made. She gratefully indulged in the pre-project high she always got when taking on a new and particularly difficult challenge that was presented to her. Although her nerves were strung tight- if she didn't find a way for a cure, then it could mean the death of her best friend.  
  
She went through books and notes on psychological disorder's, magical and Muggle, previous cures and treatments for the disorders, brushed up on a little anatomy, mainly the brain, and poured over others' notes while making her own.  
  
Everyone had noticed her absence in the mornings and afternoons, and after Severus, made the well-aimed comment to Poppy, that she was trying to look up a cure for Potter, Poppy went up to her room and demanded she give herself some personal time. After a small "disagreement" Hermione relented and took the rest of the day off.  
  
Cerelia Sprout asked her to help her pot some Bouncing Bulbs, which Hermione agreed to help with, and immediately afterwards had to take a shower as dirt was flung everywhere. The two witches had fun with it however, laughing half the time. Then she went to see Lenea Vector, (the divorce proceedings went well and he got kicked flat out on his arse, as one of the women Jack MacFarlan had philandered around with was the judge's wife) and they chatted for a while before Minerva came to get them for dinner.  
  
The three women walked down together to the Great Hall to be met by the rest of the other faculty members. Sprout was talking animatedly to Professor Dumbledore and Gamula Hooch, while Poppy Pomfrey was talking quietly to Severus. Hagrid was at the table, happily whittling away at a stick while a magical dustpan (provided by Albus) swept away the bits. As soon as they sat down, Minerva cleverly arranging it so Hermione sat next to Severus, Dumbledore motioned for the food to appear.  
  
"Hello ladies, Hagrid. Oh and Severus." He added purposefully, his eyes sparkling in Snape's direction. Snape rolled his eyes as the women all giggled at his annoyance. "I trust you have all had a relaxing day."  
  
"Well Hermione and I potted some bulbs this afternoon, and I got most of the rose bushes pruned around the end of the greenhouses. Very relaxing," chimed in Sprout. Dumbledore nodded appreciatively.  
  
"Yes I imagine it was. Alas, I've never had a talented green thumb. Most of my plants die without the aid of some form of magic," Dumbledore said while Sprout shook her head sadly.  
  
Minerva went on to say she'd completed her list of new students and their Hogwarts invitations and that they would be ready to mail later. Gamula had gone through the Quidditch inventory and ordered more brooms for next year. Hermione asked Albus how his trip to London was and he suddenly grew quiet for a moment then half glanced at Severus before reassuming his smile.  
  
"It went as expected," was all he said. No one spoke for a few moments until Severus asked Cerelia about the mandrake seedlings he had planted a few days ago to break the silence.  
  
"Oh they're doing very well Severus. Unlike Albus," and she nudged him in the ribs, "you do have a very fine green thumb." The women all snickered again. Snape graced them all with a scowl before going back to his pork chops. His elbow kept brushing Hermione's arm and she found it hard to stop fidgeting around. It almost seemed as if he had purposefully been nudging her, and "accidentally" catching her eye the past few nights at dinner. Although, if she were fair, she'd had her part in inadvertently brushing up against him as well. Reaching for the salt and pepper shakers, asking for him to pass the bread and letting her fingers linger over his, pushing her hair behind her ear a little more often than necessary. It really was a spectacle to a few of the fellow diners around the table.  
  
Albus and Minerva actually had a running bet: Who's going to kiss whom first. Minerva was sure Severus would get the move in first, while Dumbledore was positive Hermione was the bolder one this time. And ten Galleons to the winner. Poppy had laughed for a good minute when Minerva asked her to throw in a bid. And though they were discreet, Sprout, Hooch, and Vector all had their secret sneaking suspicions, and not a one protested it. They all secretly hoped they would just give in to their little games and allow themselves to be happy. They were both so desperately in need of each other. So when Severus and Hermione found themselves in positions where they were the only ones alone together with a little project, or sitting next to each other at meal times, it came as no surprise to everyone else.  
  
After everyone had finished their ice-cream sundaes, Albus suggested a night outside with a little drink was in order. All agreed, except Hermione who insisted she had more work to be done.  
  
"Yes Headmaster. Perhaps it is wise to exclude Hermione. I understand she turned down a night out with," Severus paused and raised an eyebrow at the witches in the room, "the 'ladies', as she wasn't ready for alcohol. She is just a child after all." He ended with a slight smirk and a criticizing glance at Hermione. Hagrid stifled a laugh, Minerva and Poppy looked at Hermione expectantly for a rebuttal, Sprout and Dumbledore held their breath, Lenea's eyes had popped open, and Gam let out a low whistle.  
  
***  
  
"Go, go, go, go, go..." Lenea and Gam chanted quietly as Hermione downed her 4th vodka shot and chased it with a swig of orange juice. She slammed the shot glass down and stared at Snape who nodded approvingly. Dumbledore just shook his head.  
  
"What was that about a child.Snape?" she said in a low, and to him completely sexy, voice.  
  
"I've not been completely proven wrong yet Miss Granger. The night is still young." Poppy Pomfrey tutted in her chair and quietly sipped her Pina Colada.  
  
"Severus," she said in a warning tone. "Do not incapacitate my patient."  
  
"But Poppy! Hermione is not a child, therefore she knows her limits and is quite mature enough to know how to behave," he said innocently giving her his rare angel face. She pursed her lips and stirred her drink.  
  
Dumbledore and Minerva chuckled. "That used to work on us when you were in school Severus. It doesn't anymore." She said flatly from her chair beside Albus.  
  
"Really," he smirked. 'I must find a way to prove her wrong on that account,' he thought mischievously and filed that away for a later time.  
  
Gam sat drinking her Malibu Rum next to Cerelia, who was drinking a Bonny Prince Charlie.  
  
"Severus, I must say, I am disappointed in you. You've watched Hermione all evening and not taken a single drink of anything. That's not like you." Gam prodded. He turned his gaze from Hermione, slowly back to Gam.  
  
"Indeed. What shall I start off with Madam?" She grinned and got up walking over to the little bar on Albus' deck. It was a well known fact, that Gamula was their resident bartender, having worked as one straight out of Hogwarts for a few years and she still kept her license up.  
  
"Well, let's see." She reached into a chilled cabinet and pulled out two bottles of Guinness, snapped the tops off and looked at Snape. "Begin." Everyone settled in. It was always fun watching them compete. Snape raised an eyebrow in acceptance of the challenge and sauntered over to the little bar and sat down on a barstool next to Hermione while Gam slid the bottle into Severus' waiting hand. His lips twitched at Hermione's curious gaze as he raised the bottle, clinked it against Gam's, and they began downing the contents in one go.  
  
Poppy sighed and whispered to Minerva, "I should Accio the Anti-Hangover potion right now." and Minerva chuckled.  
  
Hermione's eyes went wide as she watched her former professors swallow the beer rather quickly, each without spilling a single drop.  
  
"Next?" said Snape silkily sliding the bottle back to Gam to throw away. Hermione shivered.  
  
Gam nodded and looked around under the cabinet.  
  
"How about a nice white wine," chirped Cerelia. Gam nodded and grabbed a fresh bottle from the rack. She feigned weakness and asked Severus to open the bottle. He grinned and took it from her. He then slowly ran a delicate finger down the neck of the bottle, the women all inhaled while Hermione was starting to feel the effects of the Vodka, and the cork popped out without any carbonation.  
  
Gam whispered, "Show off," while Hermione struggled to re-gain composure. He professionally poured the wine into the offered glasses and nodded to Cerelia before swirling the glass and tasting the wine.  
  
"Excellent Albus," he offhandedly commented.  
  
"Of course," he responded smiling.  
  
Then he raised the glass to his lips and sipped slowly, never stopping, tilting his head back catching the last drop with his tongue on the rim of the glass. Hermione gasped.  
  
"Jesus Severus." commented Lenea Vector, who was also quite out of breath. He chuckled and replied.  
  
"Next?" Gamula finished her own glass and flashed a smile.  
  
"How about..a Coke and Rum?" Severus nodded and gestured with his hand allowing her to go on. Hermione started.  
  
"Isn't that.a Muggle drink? I didn't even know you knew what Coke was."  
  
"Coke is great with Rum Hermione. It may be Muggle, but we definitely know what it is." Gam said. She said snapping off the tops to the Coke bottles.  
  
"How about the Malibu Rum tonight? I'm feeling festive." He said, vaguely surprised. He actually was feeling festive. She laughed and reached down for the bottle of Malibu Rum and poured about 1/3 of the glass with Rum over the ice, and the rest of the way with the Coke. She handed him his glass.  
  
"Bottoms up Severus." They nodded and threw back the liquid again in one gulp. Severus took a cube of ice in his mouth, crunched it, and slid the glass back to Hooch.  
  
This time Minerva suggested Cognac, and Gam poured the French brandy into two snifters, letting them warm in their palms and swallowed. Minerva got up and poured herself a brandy and went to sit back down next to Albus and Poppy.  
  
"And now I think, we'll have the Scotch Gam."  
  
"Mhmm." And she prepared two glasses.  
  
"Hermione? Would you care for a glass? I'm sure you're about ready for another drink by now." He antagonized and inclined his head waiting for her reply.  
  
She paused thinking then, "Why not. I'm up to it if you are," she said defiantly. He raised his eyebrows and leaned back.  
  
"Indeed." he began but Poppy spoke up.  
  
"Careful Hermione.he'll hold you to it dear." But Hermione didn't care. She had a nice warm buzz going and felt she could handle a few more drinks. She would just go to bed soon, as she imagined everyone else would, lest they embarrass themselves.  
  
He nodded and said, "One more then Gamula. Do we have another player?" he said again looking at Hermione. Hermione contemplated him for a moment.  
  
Minerva laughed and came to Hermione's rescue. "Severus, leave her alone. She's not as 'experienced' as you are. You'll give her alcohol poisoning by the time the night is out," even Sprout laughed.  
  
Hermione straightened. She had been to bars before. She..Harry and Ron..had all gone out. She'd been drunk too. She knew what she was doing; basically. So she steeled herself and met Snape's cool gaze.  
  
"Absolutely." Everyone whistled while the flying instructor considered it. She glanced at Severus. He looked at her too and sealed the deal with his expression.  
  
"All right then." and she grabbed another glass and filled it with ice. Then she splashed a healthy amount of the amber coloured liquid into the three glasses and offered them out.  
  
"One two three," she said quickly and they all threw back their heads and let the warm liquid pour down their throats. Gam inhaled appreciatively, Snape shook his head and Hermione coughed. She'd never had Scotch before. The same process was repeated a few minutes later with glasses of Gin, followed by two more shots each of Absolut Vodka. They all sat around minutes later, after much teasing from the more.sober members of their audience. Severus was feeling just fine and Gam was quite content. Hermione however.was definitely starting to feel the alcohol worm its warmth through her body and lungs. She slumped back against the wall behind her and let the cool night air blow across her flushed face. Severus got up and went back behind the bar and reached way back into the back where he knew Albus kept a special bottle. He applied a simple Cleaning Charm to their discarded glasses and looked at his drinking participants.  
  
"One more." He said with a slight edge.  
  
Gam smiled and looked at Hermione. "I don't know Severus.she looks like she's had enough, and I'm not in the mood to take that blasted Hangover potion tonight."  
  
"Aww, so you lose Gamula?" She smirked and he produced a dark green bottle.  
  
"Oh Severus.I'm going to have to decline tonight." He tutted then Hermione spoke up, not about to lose to him.  
  
"What's next Snape?" and she straightened up in her chair. He almost felt sorry for her. Almost.  
  
"Well, if you're up to trying something new. Most assuredly you've never had this before." Poppy and Cerelia were craning their necks to see what Severus had found when Minerva inhaled.  
  
"Severus Snape, don't you dare," only half joking. Albus widened his eyes a bit, while Lenea bit back a laugh.  
  
"My dear, I think you've done well, perhaps you should call it quits for the evening?" came the Headmaster.  
  
"Nonsense Professor. Its just one more drink," and she drug her gaze back to Severus. "Isn't it." She said with a note of finality.  
  
He briefly admired her courage then smiled devilishly. "Of course."  
  
Gam went and sat down on a lawn chair prepared to watch the show and everyone settled their gazes upon Severus. He grabbed the now clean glasses, and reached into a drawer and pulled out two teaspoons. Then, after locating the sugar cubes, delicately placed one each on the teaspoons and positioned them over the rim of the glasses. Next he opened the dark green bottle and poured the clear, green liquid over the sugar cubes and into the glasses. Reaching his hand over to Hermione's face, he offered her his palm.  
  
"Blow," he said quietly. She leaned forward and gently blew into his palm which abruptly became alight with flame. She inhaled sharply and leaned back. Minerva and Lenea both applauded. Severus was always so dramatic when he did his Wandless Magic demonstrations.  
  
With his finger, he then touched each liqueur soaked cube of sugar and likewise caught them aflame. Once the sweetened cubes had melted down, he tipped their contents into the drink and swirled them both at the same time. Hermione watched as the dark green liquid turned into a milky white. He grabbed both glasses and slowly walked around to the front of the bar to offer her a glass.  
  
She sniffed its contents but he stopped her. "Take it in one go." She nodded suspiciously.  
  
"What is this?" Everyone was biting their lips and holding their breath. This was a very serious drink.  
  
He reached over to her glass taking her hand in his and raised it to just in front of her lips.  
  
"Absinthe. Now." And he tilted the glasses to their lips and quickly swallowed. Hermione almost choked as she tried to swallow the liquid fire and inhaled sharply when she finished. Snape calmly set his glass down as Hermione coughed and struggled to catch her breath. Everyone applauded, but Poppy got up to get ready to give them both a dose of the Anti-Hangover potion.  
  
Snape took a couple steps closer towards Hermione. She could smell the harsh liqueur on his breath- it was almost intoxicating. She suddenly felt very dizzy and she placed her hands on his chest for balance and looked up into his eyes.  
  
He leaned down closer to her face and whispered, "Very good, Hermione." She blinked and immediately passed out into Snape's waiting arms as Vector and Hooch laughed quietly.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Poppy chastised Snape for egging her on like that; he knew full well she wouldn't have backed down from any dare he proposed. After she checked her blood for any sign of poisoning, she had Severus rub her throat while she poured the Hangover Draught into her mouth. He gently rubbed, coaxing her muscles into its natural reflex to swallow. Once done, Poppy spelled a stretcher into the air and he gently picked her up and lay her down. He would have carried her himself, but even he was human- the large amount of liqueur was getting even to him. He blinked a few times. Poppy noticed and slipped him a vial as well, which he declined.  
  
"Nope." He said slowly. "Not tonight." She nodded cautiously and led Hermione's unconscious form out of Dumbledore's quarters and in to her own to bed. Everyone else sat stretched out on chairs staring up into the sky. Each with a smile plastered on their face. Snape reclined in a lawn chair and pointed his gaze up at the clear night sky. The clouds had cleared and the grounds still smelled of wet earth from the earlier rain. It was very quiet except for the noise of crickets and the occasional owl.  
  
"I beat you again." He cracked at Gam.  
  
She flipped him off, and everyone busted up laughing. Even Snape gave in. He was drunk; he didn't care.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The next morning Hermione woke with only a slight headache, which she took a simple potion for. Her mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton and there was sand in her eyes. She slipped out of bed, not even bothering to put on her fuzzy slippers, and trudged to the bathroom. This morning called for a nice long bubble bath. She let the large pool-like bathtub fill up, and she selected a nice rose-scented bath salt and stepped out of her nightgown.  
  
'When did I put on my nightgown?' she thought. Come to think of that, she couldn't remember how she even got back to her rooms. She lightly eased into the hot water and sighed as the bubbles came up to her chin.  
  
"Oh yeah." she sighed closed her eyes and leaned her head against the cool porcelain. She tried to think back to the last thing she remembered. That horrible drink.Absinthe. She shuddered. "God, I must have been plastered last night to have drunk that." 'And...oh. Severus.' She remembered the way he had uncorked that wine bottle and his hands near her face.didn't he whisper in her ear before- she shivered and closed her eyes.  
  
She dipped her hair into the water, getting it wet, and leaned back again, then brought her right hand up to her neck and rubbed her muscles. She wished it were his hands instead of hers. Her hand slid slowly down her body at its own volition as she imagined hearing his deep, milky voice purring in her ear. Maybe his tongue would dart out and- she shook her head cutting off the enticing thought.  
  
'No.'  
  
He had made her feel wanted. At least every now and then. But then there would be times when he seemed to push her away.  
  
'Maybe he never wanted me at all,' her thoughts were betraying her. 'Typical. Just like every other prospective male in the world.' She never could figure it out. Men never seemed to be interested in her. She knew she was no beauty, but she could be attractive. And even if she did catch one's eye, he would never continue to stay caught. Or they never.made her feel like all the books and movies described. She never felt that passion, and incredible sense of love. That spark that everyone else got to feel seemed to be permanently snuffed out for her. She thought maybe she just wasn't normal.  
  
But then, there was Severus. He excited her, intrigued her.hell, he downright turned her on. He was intelligent, extremely sharp-witted and tongued (she smiled at that thought); he was respected, well-read, very well-spoken, and unbelievably attractive. And dear Gods, that voice. She rinsed out the shampoo in her hair and began with the conditioner.  
  
That last moment when she was inside herself he had made her feel so wanted.like she had something to come back to. Maybe even him. She swore she could see it in his eyes. But something seemed to be wrong. He never quite let go and gave in to her. She thought she was being pretty obvious. She sighed frustrated, and this time rinsed the conditioner out of her hair. Idly, she thought it smelled great.  
  
She stood up, after rinsing off, and reached for a huge, fluffy white towel and dried herself off, then wrapped a smaller one around her dripping hair and walked out of the bathroom. She stepped into her bedroom and put on her deep red, silk chamber robe and looked around for Crookshanks. Not seeing him on the bed, she walked into the living room and called for him.  
  
"Kitty kitty? Crookshanks? Come 'ere baby." When he didn't respond she shrugged thinking he must still be out roaming around. So she turned around to get dressed and decided since she took the day off yesterday, she'd go back into the library and work some more. Maybe if she had a handle on Harry's situation she could go to him and be okay. She felt terrible. She hadn't seen him yet, but she honestly wasn't strong enough. She would be ready soon, she hoped.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Snape had awoken at six in the morning to a splitting headache after refusing to take the medicine offered to him last night.  
  
'Why? Why are you so ignorant sometimes Severus,' he chided laying his hands over his eyes to block out the weak sunlight filtering through his curtains. He had slept in his pants last night, so he had to struggle to unwind himself from the bedclothes. It was tiring work, and it did not add to the relief of his throbbing skull. Frustrated he kicked the damn sheets off and was rewarded with a low growl. Startled he rolled over and lifted up the pillow beside him to see a massive, orange blob of fur curled up. And it was obviously pissed off for being woken up so roughly. Snape smiled and reached over to pet the cat.  
  
"Did you get kicked out last night?" The cat went back to purring contentedly and rolled over to have his belly scratched. Snape shook his head but complied. "How did you get in here anyways." then remembered he'd forgotten to take out his own cat door he'd made while he'd kept her pet.  
  
Hermione.  
  
His mind flicked back to her pretty flushed face of last night. He really had to admire her bravery for taking the Absinthe. He'd gotten Gam and Albus to do it once with him, but no one else. He squinted into the room and sloughed off to the bathroom to down a vial of Anti-Hangover Potion and take a hot shower and shave.  
  
~*~*~  
  
When Hermione came into the library after breakfast that morning, Severus Snape was there bent over a book. She smiled and walked straight over to him; he continued to read his book.  
  
"You had quite an interesting night last night. I was surprised; you proved me wrong." He said sarcastically, still not looking up. He knew it was her by her scent alone.  
  
"Oh," and she placed her hand over her heart, "I think I've just died. Severus Snape just complimented me and admitted he was wrong in one sentence."  
  
He looked up and stared blankly at her. "And then you open your mouth." She scowled at him. "How dramatic. Did you forget you passed out right into my arms last night? Don't pride yourself too much Hermione."  
  
'Into your arms?! Damn.I must have forgotten that. What a pity,' she thought dejectedly.  
  
"I did huh?" and she took a few steps closer to Snape getting right in his personal space. Snape stiffened and she bent down, with her hands on the table beside him. She could smell his spiced musky scent, mixed with soap. "If you wanted me in your arms, Severus, all you had to do was ask." she purred. His mouth went dry but he remained calm and stared at her blankly.  
  
"You think too highly of yourself Granger." And he looked back to his book. She scoffed and headed towards the bookshelves to find her own book. Once back, she settled into the chair right beside him and stared. His eyes were quickly roving over the pages and his brows knit in concentration. His thumb then stretched up to his index finger and popped the joints before settling again.  
  
He sighed. "Are you going to stare at me all day? It's rude."  
  
"No. I was just-"somewhere out in the hall someone screamed. His head snapped up and she quickly turned her gaze to the open door of the library. They quickly glanced at each other and were up out of their chairs and racing towards the door. Upon reaching it, Snape paused and held his arm out stopping Hermione. She looked at him and backed away from the door as he drew his wand. He cautiously peered out the doorway, not to be caught off-guard, and then nodded to her.  
  
They slowly stepped into the deserted hallway, before hearing a muffled sound coming from the trophy room. They dashed back down the hall towards the sounds. Hermione was behind him and watched as he quietly ran to the trophy room. His years of spying must have made him very adept at this kind of thing. When they got to the door, again, he paused before going in. He heard Cerelia shouting and immediately bolted towards her voice.  
  
"Cerelia?! Where are you?!" he bellowed.  
  
She called from the end of the room no less. Hermione followed him, drawing out her own wand. His wand was already out pointed towards the area around the Herbology professor.  
  
"PEEVES!! By Merlin, I swear if you drop that it will be the end of you!" the usually calm little witch spat. Her face was flushed red, and her own wand was out pointed at the irritating poltergeist holding some sort of flowering pot.  
  
Hermione and Severus looked up and pointed their wands. Severus closed his eyes and muttered under his breath.  
  
Sprout turned to him desperately. "Do something Severus! You have no idea how rare and expensive that flower is! It took me five whole years to track down the seeds!" Snape looked at her and blinked. Hermione tried to keep a straight face.  
  
"Is that what all that shouting was for?" he screeched. "Christ Ceri! I thought you were being killed!" She shook her head frustratingly.  
  
"Well I might as well be dead if he destroys that damn flower! I was out in the hall about to present it to Albus, when that wretched thing came up and surprised me from behind. He grabbed it from my hands and bounced away down the hall and in to here. Severus please, please get it back!" she pleaded. Hermione smiled sympathetically at the distraught witch and looked at Severus. Above them Peeves was cackling and bouncing maniacally with the flower pot in his hands. Severus sighed and pointed his wand back up into the air.  
  
"Peeves! So help me, I will destroy you if you do not return that flower, CALMLY, back to Sprout! I will see to it that the Bloody Baron has a word with you as well." He said dangerously. Peeves' cackling ceased at the sound of the Bloody Baron's name he stopped and looked down at the Potions master. He had a small amount of respect for Snape, but he would disregard it for a great gag like this.  
  
"You will, eh dark one?" he said. Snape narrowed his eyes and nodded. His rage was very apparent in his face. Peeves faltered a moment and considered the plant in his hands. Sprout held her breath.  
  
"But it's just a silly ickle flower! And it would crunch so nicely from up here."  
  
"Peeves." Snape warned in his baritone voice. Hermione looked between the poltergeist and Snape.  
  
The apparition slowly descended down, above a particularly large trophy cabinet and hovered a bit. "Well, if you want it back that badly." and he slowly dropped the pot so that it fell behind the cabinet.  
  
Snape shot a jet of angry red sparks at Peeves and he was zoomed out of the room. They had listened for the sound of the ceramic pot shattering but it must have gotten wedged in between the cabinet and wall. Sprout had gasped, and let out a string of obscenities that Hermione thought was unimaginable. They all walked over to the heavy cabinet and Snape crawled behind the neighbouring case and squinted through the darkness to try and see it. He muttered Lumos and his wand tip lighted up and illuminated the flower pot. Sure enough it was wedged and he said as much.  
  
"Don't move the cabinet Severus! The pot could fall and break. I can't risk it. Try to reach in there and grab it by hand," Sprout said nervously. He again muttered under his breath and reached in as far as he could. It was just beyond fingertip length.  
  
"I can't quite get it," he grunted. Hermione stepped forward, crawled behind the case Severus had, and offered to try. The space was very cramped and he tried to slide back to let Hermione have a go, as she was smaller than him. She slid past him, her breasts squishing into his chest. He had to stifle a gasp at the contact, as did she, as she continued to try to get by him. Her face was very close to his as they whispered their apologies to each other. Then her feet got tangled up in his and she stumbled and his arms wrapped around her waist to quickly balance her. She smiled coyly, and he looked at her curiously. 'What is she playing at?' he thought. She could feel the heat radiating off him and tried not to blush.  
  
'Damnit, I have to get out of here.' Snape thought wildly. Hermione was loving every second of it* as she peered up into his eyes. Finally he released her and she was able to slip by. But then he had to lean back against her so he could shine his wand light behind the cabinet so she could see. Her bottom was pressing against his hip as she wiggled in to reach the pot and he bit back a groan and closed his eyes.  
  
"Do you almost have it?" he said desperately.  
  
"Almost," she said and stretched her arm out to its full length. With a final push behind into the cabinet space, almost his undoing, she latched on to the edge of the pot and called out. "Got it!" she smiled triumphantly. Then she tried to back out. She couldn't. "Damnit." She whispered.  
  
She had wiggled again against him and this time he had to step back. "What?" he panted.  
  
"Um.I seem to be stuck. A little help please?" she said blushing, though he couldn't see it. She heard him sigh.  
  
He pocketed his wand again and slipped his hands around her waist, his palms flat against her belly. This time Hermione had to bite back a moan. He tugged once, twice, and with a third time she slipped out and tumbled back against him. His arm flew out against the wall and the case to steady them, the other back around her waist as she clutched the pot close against her chest to keep from dropping it. Once she straightened they slowly backed out from the tight space and Cerelia squealed with happiness.  
  
"Splendid!" and she snatched the flower away from Hermione. "Oh thank you so much my dears! You really are a lifesaver Severus," she beamed. She had noticed his frustrated look; she knew exactly what had happened and she laughed on the inside.  
  
Hermione smiled at her, and quickly glanced at Severus. His eyes were averted downwards and said it was no problem.  
  
"Just be more careful next time," he said with a sour face, trying to sound strict and gain some amount of control again.  
  
"Oh I will," and she turned around and left leaving them alone.  
  
They nervously stood there for a moment. He was trying to decide if she had done that on purpose, she was wondering if he had enjoyed it as much as her. She glanced at his lips, which were thinned, and noticed he looked to be in deep concentration, staring at the floor. What she didn't know was that he was chanting a phrase to himself to calm himself back down.  
  
'She was my student, she was my student, she was my student, she was my student!' When their eyes finally met she swore there was the faintest tinge of pink high up on his cheeks and she smiled shyly.  
  
"Sorry," they said at the same time. She grinned and looked away as Severus turned to walk back out the door of the trophy room. She quickly walked to catch up to him.  
  
"What's next?" she said as they turned in to the hall.  
  
~*~*~  
  
They spent the rest of the day together in the library, looking over notes to try to find something the doctors at St. Mungo's had missed while trying to help Harry. Severus admired her perseverance; right when they thought they had found something, anything, that could help, it always turned out to be a dead end. But she never gave up and insisted they keep looking. The work was very frustrating, with no rewards and Snape kept thinking, 'If Potter makes it out of this alive, he owes me one.' But then Hermione's arm would brush against his, or she'd place her hand over his as she pointed out a note on some parchment and he'd start to rethink the idea of their lack of rewards.  
  
Despite his best efforts, he too kept finding ways to touch her. He knew he shouldn't be thinking of her in any other way that would be unprofessional, but damn she was so tempting. What he would have given to run his hands all over her small little body with her creamy-coloured skin and make her moan. He wondered what she would taste like and if her lips were as soft as that skin. As he was thinking this he made a strangled sound as she had returned and bent over his shoulder and whispered that she found another book in his ear, and he quickly had to stand up and back away. If she did something like that again he was going to throw her on the table and have her right there.  
  
Startled, she looked at him with concern. "Are you okay?" He just glared at her. "Severus?"  
  
"What?" he growled. She blinked.  
  
"What's wrong?" she took a step towards him; he was so jumpy today. He held out his hand indicating she should stop, and ran his other hand through his hair. He was trying to think of the words to say, but came up with nothing. Defeated, he let out an exasperating sigh, slumped his shoulders and looked at her with desperation in his eyes. She took another step towards him, worried, when someone came in the door.  
  
"Hermione!" a shrill voice ripped through the air as Molly Weasley came running through the door, her little eyes full of tears and grabbed Hermione hugging her.  
  
"Molly!" she shrieked and hugged back. She was so happy to see her! Mrs. Weasley had been like a second mother to her growing up. That thought brought back tears to her eyes and she hugged tighter. Severus took a step back and looked up at Albus, who had escorted her into the library.  
  
Molly Weasley held her for a few more moments before standing back to look at her and shook her head. She had felt just awful for not having come to see Hermione sooner. But she had had no strength left after the deaths of George and Ron, her heart hitched at the recent memory, and had been trying to comfort Ginny, and look after Harry, and try to keep the family held together while trying to convince herself to keep breathing, that she just couldn't come to Hermione's side. Tears were streaming down the plump little woman's face.  
  
"Oh my dear." Hermione's eyes filled with tears again and she tried to smile. "Oh my dear," her voiced cracked and she hugged Hermione again. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. Hermione was fighting the urge to break down and sob. Having Molly here was bringing all her painful memories back, and Severus just stopped himself from going to her side.  
  
Mrs. Weasley went on. "Forgive me for not being here sooner," she half-heartedly laughed. "I've had things to attend to at home," and more tears spilled down her flushed cheeks. She shook her head and straightened up; now was not the time to lose her self-possession. She came here to comfort Hermione and get her out in to the world again. "You're too thin," she clucked, observing the young girl before her, and turned to Albus grinning. "Are you feeding her Albus?"  
  
He smiled. "Of course. We're all a little strained, but I'm sure some of your famous home-cooking can cure that particular problem," the Headmaster replied with twinkling eyes. Mrs. Weasley waved him off, smiling, and turned back to Hermione.  
  
"How are you dear?" Hermione met her motherly gaze and shrugged. She had been feeling better until now; but she was still very happy to see her.  
  
"How." Hermione trailed off trying to find the right words. "How is everyone? How is Ginny?" She knew Harry and Ginny had been together for a few years now. Ginny had been after him since she was a first year and finally after seducing him, with a little of Hermione's help, she was able to get him to see the light and he had given in and fell completely in love with her. Hermione had imagined that Harry would have been proposing any day until..  
  
Molly shook her head and sighed. "She hardly ever leaves the hospital. No matter what I say. But if I beg, sometimes I can get her to come home and take a bath and eat a hot meal." Hermione nodded sadly. She blinked and looked away; embarrassed that she hadn't seen Harry yet. She felt a kind hand on her shoulder and looked back into Molly Weasley's sympathetic eyes.  
  
"We all understand." She sighed sadly. "We almost lost you too dear." Hermione's bottom lip trembled and she looked at Severus. He started to walk over to her as Molly continued. "Hermione, would you come stay with us for a few days? I want you to be with us. You need to be around friends, and more than that, I need to fuss over you and make sure you're okay," she finished, smiling. She stopped as Severus came up behind her. "Oh! Not that you're not around friends now that is. I'm getting old and not watching my mouth aren't I?" she chuckled. Hermione smiled and Severus' lips quirked. "I just mean, well, I was hoping you and Ginny could help each other." Her eyes became desperate. "I.I've tried everything. She has no light in her eyes anymore Hermione. Come home with us. She needs you. And I think you need her too."  
  
Hermione and Ginny had been best friends all throughout school and their relationship had only intensified once they graduated. They had even lived together for a year before Ginny had found a different university to attend. And really, she did need Ginny. She missed her company, and her perkiness. And she knew what it was to have lost someone. She lost two brothers and was on the verge of losing the love of her life. A visit couldn't hurt. Hermione bit her lip uncertainly and looked at Albus who and nodded, then back to Mrs. Weasley; she was crying again and her voice was wracked with pent-up emotion.  
  
"I've buried two sons, almost lost a girl I hold as my own daughter, and if things keep up I'll bury another son," she said indicating Harry and her voice broke. "I can't lose my baby girl too. Not only me, but Arthur would just.please come Hermione. If only for a little while." Hermione's heart lurched. Mrs. Weasley had been the strongest-willed woman she'd ever known and to see her in this state was almost too much. Her strong, fiery façade had crumbled into a tear-streaked, messy haired ball of struggling despair.  
  
"Of course Molly. I'd love to come. I think I might need it too." Molly smiled and embraced her again. When she let go Severus bent down and whispered in Hermione's ear.  
  
"I'll send the house-elves for your things. You stay with Molly." Hermione half turned and looked into his eyes. They were unreadable.  
  
She whispered back, "Thank you Severus." He nodded tersely to her, then to Mrs. Weasley and walked out of the room while Albus convinced them to have some tea with him and Minerva up in his study and let them catch up.  
  
Once the small tea break was over, Severus briefly spoke with the Headmaster, and they all walked to the entry way to say goodbye. Severus assured Hermione that her things were packed and he, Albus and Minerva walked them to the waiting carriage. They didn't want to Apparate with all of Hermione's luggage and Crookshanks. Minerva hugged Hermione goodbye and said she'd see her soon, then gave Mrs. Weasley a tight embrace and dabbed at her eyes. The Gryffindor head of house had been hurt by the death of the two Weasley boys as well. Albus also gave each of them a squeeze and Severus held open the door for them. Molly waved goodbye and allowed Severus to help her in the horseless carriage, then Hermione turned to him. He nodded his head and offered his hand to her. She gently smiled, took it and stepped into the carriage as well, and was handed Crookshanks' pet taxi. The cat hated being in that thing. Then, to her and Mrs. Weasley's surprise, Severus got in after them. They both looked at him startled as he shut the door and nodded at the other two outside and sat down across from them. At their curious stares he answered their questioning looks.  
  
"I'm to escort you ladies to the Weasley home and see that you arrive there safely." He said calmly. Mrs. Weasley glanced at Hermione and grinned.  
  
"Always the gentleman Severus?" Despite all the horrid tales her children drug home every year about the dreaded Slytherin Potions master, she and Arthur held a deep respect for Snape. They were all on a first name basis especially after the children's fourth year when Molly learned that Severus was a hidden spy for Albus. She knew what kind of life it must be after Arthur had told her tales of some of the spies he'd found working for the Light that had been tortured and killed, and she deeply admired him; as did Arthur. It must have taken so much strength and courage to endure that kind of a life. Not to mention the natural motherly worry she had for him after knowing he had saved her son's life and Harry's too. Well, if you thought about it, he was trying to save numerous people's lives by trying to defeat Voldemort. Arthur had been in contact with Severus in the Ministry during the war and he had also held Snape in high-esteem.  
  
Severus twitched the corner of his lip and nodded. "I try." Mrs. Weasley giggled and patted Hermione's hand as she stared at him.  
  
The carriage set off out of the grounds and with a bang, set off in a manner very much like the Knight Bus, and made its jerky way to Ottery St. Catchpole; the little village the Weasley's lived in. When the carriage reached the village, it slowed down and rolled down the cobblestone path and out into the country where the Weasley's home was.  
Molly looked at Severus as he gazed out the window and the passing fields. "I don't know if we ever thanked you Severus, Arthur and I, but we do. You've done so much, for so many people." Snape looked at her, taken aback. Molly met his startled eyes and replied intensely. "Thank you." He blinked, not quite sure what to say or make of it and nodded jerkily. Molly smiled faintly again and fiddled with her purse as they neared her home.  
  
Hermione turned her head to look out the window as the Burrow came in sight. She smiled fondly thinking back to the first time she'd seen the oddly built house. Ron, with his red hair had come running happily out of the house, being chased by Ginny, and had come to greet her and her parents..Hermione broke off and looked away. Severus looked at her with concern. She gave him a weak smile and nodded that she was okay. He looked skeptical but accepted it. When the carriage slowed to a stop, Snape opened the door to help the two women out then reached around for Hermione's luggage. Hermione stooped down and let Crookshanks out to roam around, as he was already familiar with the Weasley's home. Molly led them to the door and told Severus he could just leave the bags in the entry way. She asked him to stay for dinner, but he said he had some work he needed to get back to, and politely declined. Hermione arched an eyebrow and he shot her a look as if daring her to prove it. Molly looked at them oddly, and then shook her head.  
  
"Arthur! We have company!" she yelled to the living room. Hermione grinned. She heard the sound of a chair squeaking and shuffling footsteps as Mr. Weasley entered the hallway. His face looked drawn and tired, and there were lines around his eyes that were smudged with purple. He had the expression of a mourning father. But when he saw Hermione the frown lines had deepened on his usually cheerful face briefly, before he smiled happily and embraced Hermione.  
  
"Hello my dear." He said into her hair. "How are you?" She stood back to look at him before he added, "Well, you don't have to answer that yet. You just enjoy your time with us. Can I get you anything?" Molly fussed, forgetting to ask first, and offered some tea to Hermione and Severus. Arthur then noticed the other man was there and he smiled again extending his hand. Severus took it and nodded again.  
  
"Arthur."  
  
"Severus, hello. I didn't realize you were coming. I hope you're well. How are things at Hogwarts?" They chatted for a few more seconds before Snape made his cue to leave. Then Bill and Charlie, the eldest brothers, followed by Percy and Fred entered and said their hello's. It was quite a shock to Severus to see the normally, bursting to life-full of laughter and mischief, smiling family look so...sad. It didn't seem right, Snape thought, and it disturbed him. He shook hands with the Weasley children and offered his condolences. Then they all grabbed Hermione, hugging her and passed her around. She laughed a bit, and when she got to Fred, her lips pressed into a line and she hugged him tightly. His lip trembled as he hugged her fiercely. She had been with him when his twin brother George had been killed. He hadn't seen her since that night. But he was glad she was okay. He felt a twinge of guilt as he too hadn't had the energy to leave his room after the death of his brothers. He and George had been particularly close as they were twins. And not seeing him everyday had really been a blow; it was like he had lost a part of himself.  
  
"I'm so sorry Fred," she whispered into his shoulder. She hadn't seen him since that night to give him her condolences.  
  
"Me too," he answered and gazed at her apprehensively.  
  
Snape cleared his throat. "Well, I had best be off." And he turned towards the door. Hermione turned to follow him out as he said goodbye to all the Weasley's. They walked slowly back to the carriage in silence. She didn't really want to leave him, but she needed to be here.  
  
When they got to the coach they turned to look at each other. She took his hand in hers and he squeezed it affectionately. He knew she was struggling with her emotions so he just remained quiet. She looked up into his dark eyes.  
  
"Thank you Severus." He furrowed his brows in question and displeasure. He'd had too many thank-you's today and didn't quite know how to handle them. However, he chose to overlook his annoyance, and instead leaned in close to her cheek.  
  
"If you need me, just flew over. I'll be available any time." He whispered deeply. His warm breath flowed across her skin making it tingle, and his lips connected. She softly inhaled and closed her eyes as he kissed her lightly on the cheek. Her legs felt like putty as he let her hands go to step into the carriage and with a bang, the carriage took off again. She stood motionless for a few moments staring at the place he had stood before she turned and walked back into the Burrow. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had unintentionally caught that last moment of affection and Arthur turned to his wife questioningly.  
  
"What..?" He began but didn't finish. She shrugged and smiled and turned to go in to the kitchen to make dinner and he into the living room.  
  
When Hermione walked into the house she heard Mrs. Weasley call to Fred to take Hermione's bags up to Ginny's room. She smiled grateful that some things never change.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: Ohhh the angst. Now, this next chapter will be a biggie, so you must stick around. I don't know why I haven't begun writing until now. I seriously enjoy it. Okay, so I showed you some Weasley's! Are you happy? There will a ton of Weasley action next chapter too, so don't despair. And we'll see Ginny as well.  
  
Thank you to my endlessly divine betas: Lenea, Gam and Kel!!  
  
And to everyone who reviewed!!!  
  
Okay, I'm going to get started on chapter 11 now. 


	11. The Infamous Chapter Eleven

Touchstone  
  
Chapter Eleven  
  
By Gin  
  
Dinner at the Weasley's wasn't quite the jovial affair Hermione had remembered it to be. That night there wasn't the usual laughter and tricks; it was much more quiet and subdued with only occasional chatter. Mrs. Weasley had quickly flooed to St. Mungo's to tell Ginny that Hermione had come, thus persuading her daughter to come home.  
  
Hermione had been surprised to see her once youthful and lively friend looking so haggard and spent. Ginny had stepped out of the fireplace, not even bothering to brush the soot off, and placed her hand on the mantle to catch her breath. Her long, fiery-red hair had been swept up into a messy ponytail, her clothes hung off her thin body, and there were shadows under her once sparkling eyes. Ginny had taken one look at Hermione before slowly walking silently to her friend; head bent, and embracing her tearfully. Hermione had never seen Ginny so stressed looking, and her heart squeezed painfully in her chest. She hadn't felt the full brunt of the brothers' deaths, particularly Ron's death, until she had come here. Hermione had hugged her defeated friend, and wiped her tears away, then took her by the hand and into the kitchen to have dinner. They all sat quietly, Hermione exclaiming, excessively, how wonderful the food was.  
  
"I haven't eaten this much in weeks, Molly," she replied.  
  
"As I've noticed. It's good to see you eat, as I said, you look much too thin," the mother had fussed and pointedly looked at Ginny; who quickly picked up her fork.  
  
Charlie, being the one to try to add colour back into his family's life, spoke up. "So how are things back at the castle? Are you staying there for the summer?" he asked behind a mouth full of mashed potatoes. Mrs. Weasley glared at him for being impolite and he had the grace to blush.  
  
Hermione looked up from her plate to look at Charlie. "I suppose things are fine there. I'm not accustomed to life at the castle during the summer, but I imagine it is going on much the same as it always has. And as for my staying there, I have no idea. Madam Pomfrey has been the one insisting I continue to stay as her patient. I'm not free to leave until she says so apparently," she smiled ruefully. She figured they just wanted to keep an eye on her, whether she was well or not. Charlie nodded in assent, and Bill took up the questions.  
  
"So, I take it the Ministry has given you a much-needed vacation, eh?" Hermione's smile faded and she visibly paled.  
  
'Oh my God!' she thought frantically as she dropped her dinner fork with a clatter. She had been so engrossed in the quiet solitude and comfort of Hogwarts, that she had completely forgotten about her job! She was probably fired! She opened and closed her mouth, trying to find something to say. No one had heard from her outside of Hogwarts, the Weasley's aside, since the war a couple of weeks back. She quickly looked to Arthur to see if he'd heard anything about her absence from the Ministry.  
  
Arthur noticed her struggling, and for once chuckled; barely a smile had even passed his lips since his sons' deaths. The children glimpsed their father secretly, while Molly smiled in relief. As soon as the war had begun, the current Minister of Magic, Cornelius Fudge, had been dismissed from his job because he hadn't taken Dumbledore's warnings seriously early on, and therefore not preventing the war. Then failed to stop the Death- Eater attacks, and very nearly causing their own defeat against Voldemort in the end. The other higher ranking Ministry officials had all taken over during the last times of war and Arthur Weasley, having known about the impending war and trying to rally help, had become suddenly quite popular and even more respected. As of now, many people had been pulling for him as the new Minister of Magic, and most already considered him as such. He now waved off Hermione's concern and smiled.  
  
"Albus owled me to let me know of your, er, state. I checked in with your boss and he told me to make sure you had all the time off you needed, so everything is okay on that front."  
  
Hermione let out the breath she had been holding, and nodded gratefully to Arthur. For the rest of the night what little conversation that was held was limited to everyone else's jobs and such. Fred mentioned that he and George had just opened a second joke shop, Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, in London before the major part of the war had begun. Despite the struggling economy, the business had done quite well; people were desperate for any form of laughter. The table again fell silent; Hermione awkwardly poking at her chicken breast. She glanced at Ginny and noticed that she hadn't said a word the entire evening, nor eaten much either. She also noticed Percy wasn't much better off than Ginny.  
  
When dessert had been finished, the girls rose to help Mrs. Weasley clear away the table and help with the dishes, while the rest of the Weasley clan went into the living room. Molly went on about a new scouring charm, while Hermione only listened with half an ear, as she had been documenting Ginny's quiet behaviour. When they had the dishes dry, they all made their way into the living room with the men. Hermione couldn't help glancing at the grandfather clock in passing. She had hopefully looked at the tiny golden minute hands labelled, "Ron" and "George". Everyone else's hands all pointed to "Home" with glum expressions on their tiny faces, while Ron's little picture space...was blank and dangling limply, pointed downwards to nothing. Hermione bit her lip in an effort not to cry. But then she furrowed her brow; George's tiny hand was oddly enough pointed to "Travelling," but was blank as well. Startled, she quickly turned her head to look at Fred. He caught her gaze and shrugged helplessly, shaking his head. Charlie then came up silently behind her.  
  
"Dad says the clock has been in Mum's family for years. He says it must just be old and starting to malfunction. It's the only explanation we have." Hermione slowly nodded and gave Charlie a sympathetic smile, as he gazed with sad eyes at his family's grandfather clock, before going over to grab an extra chair and settle near the couch next to Ginny.  
  
Hermione couldn't help but feel a huge wave of guilt wash over her; if she hadn't let her feelings get the better of her that night, she could have thought properly and not have gotten caught by Crabbe and Goyle. Then Ron and Harry wouldn't have come after her, and Ron would still be here with his family and Harry would be by Ginny's side. She sighed and glanced around the room, which had a melancholy air to it that had never been present in all her times at the Burrow.  
  
Arthur Weasley was fiddling with, Hermione blinked, a Muggle television remote control and talking quietly to Bill who was seated in a small, wooden chair next to him. Fred was sitting on the steps that lead to the upper floors of the house, sighing painfully and pointing his wand at a fake Galleon causing it to move wherever he wished, while Percy was staring blankly at the latest issue of the Daily Prophet in a small armchair in one corner. Charlie was dragging a fold-up chair next to Hermione, who was now sitting on one end of the old patched up couch next to Ginny. Mrs. Weasley came in carrying a load of laundry and began half-heartedly folding clothes in the chair on the opposite side of the couch from Arthur.  
  
Ginny was sitting with her arms wrapped around herself, staring blankly at the fireplace. Hermione scooted closer to better get her attention, to no avail. Then Fred spoke up.  
  
"Mum," he said with a lack of his usual playful air, "it's too quiet. Let's turn on the Wireless, shall we?" She nodded and Fred walked over to an old looking version of a Muggle radio and touched his wand to it. It started up, blaring a loud, rock type of music that Bill grinned at, but caused everyone else to wince. Fred shook his head, glancing at Bill and flicked his wand. The station changed to something a bit softer, and more appropriate, just to fill in the quiet spaces, and Fred went back to his perch on the stairs. Abruptly, Percy stood and nudged past Fred and walked silently up to his room. Mrs. Weasley stared up at the stairs worriedly; Arthur sat stony-faced staring at the old carpet rug in front of the hearth. Percy had never quite been the same since he came back home. He had left his family in Hermione's fifth year, causing much sadness to his parents, then returned a year later when Ginny and Ron were almost killed by Death Eaters. He had been ashamed, and had a hard time looking his family in the face. The sadness and pain in the room was like a tangible force, squeezing everyone's chest, stifling their breath.  
  
Hermione laid her hand on Ginny's. The youngest Weasley looked up at Hermione with a closed expression. Hermione tried to give a reinforcing smile, and squeezed her hand. Suddenly a rowdy garden gnome came crashing into the bottom of the door that led to the backyard, startling everyone, and giggling maniacally, scampered off, followed by a hissing Crookshanks. Mrs. Weasley looked up from her clothes and huffed.  
  
"Arthur, they've gotten way out of hand again." Her husband nodded and looked at Hermione sheepishly, who pretended not to notice, and motioned to the boys.  
  
"Boys," he gestured towards the door. Fred quickly got up, followed by Charlie and Bill and went outside to de-gnome the gardens.  
  
"I think I'll help, too," Ginny said suddenly, and also headed for the door; Hermione in tow. Once outside, Fred began viciously zapping little pest after pest over the wall. Bill and Charlie lazily picked them off, while Ginny just walked around. Hermione came up to her side and walked with her.  
  
"I had to get out of there," Ginny said with an exasperated laugh. "I can't stand it in there. That's why I don't come home much anymore." They walked on a bit more and Hermione tried to keep the erupting emotions at bay, being sympathetic to her friend. After a few minutes, Ginny continued. "I was really hoping you'd be okay....I hope you forgive me for not-"  
  
"I know Ginny. Its okay, I had other people there with me. You had other...things to..." Hermione faded off and Ginny just nodded, staring off in front of her. They kept walking.  
  
"I was meaning to ask you...if he, I mean Ron...he wasn't tortured or anything?" Ginny's voice lightly quivered. Hermione's bottom lip trembled as she recalled her best friend's last moments of life. She shook her head and tried to sound stronger than she felt.  
  
"No. It was quick and painless." Hermione's chest was heaving, even though they had not walked for very long. Ginny nodded and closed her eyes.  
  
"That's good." She was silent for five whole minutes before she spoke again. "No one really got to tell us the details...." She gave a soft laugh; "He was probably being bull-headed and plunged right in, didn't he?" she looked kindly at Hermione. Hermione, in return, stifled a strangled sob, smiling and nodded. Ginny's hand reached out to Hermione's and squeezed. Hermione clenched her eyes and squeezed back.  
  
"We don't blame you Hermione. We're all proud of him. Both of them. George and Ron died fighting for what was right; you mustn't blame yourself for Ron. Or Harry," she added quietly. Hermione's mind screamed that she did in fact blame herself, and how could she not, but she had instead said a casual, "I know." There were so many things she was just dying, 'wrong choice of words Granger', to talk to Ginny about, but she opted for silence again.  
  
They continued on walking past the front yard, and onto an old dirt path, heading away from the fading sun. Neither of them spoke as they were lost to their own thoughts. Ginny walked as if in a trance; her eyes unfocused, but her movements sure. Hermione didn't even realize where Ginny was taking her, or that she had even left the Weasley's home, until they reached a little wooded area that another, smaller dirt path curved into. Ginny's brows were furrowed in sadness as she held back the limbs while she walked through a narrow, stone archway and into a little clearing surrounded by enormous oak trees. Hermione followed her in and stopped; her jaw hanging open.  
  
It was a small family cemetery that looked to be very old. There were gravestones covered in moss, some almost overgrown. Hermione glanced around at stones of different sizes, and height lined up in neat little rows, as she felt her hand being tugged to follow Ginny. Hermione's heart was racing; she knew what was coming up and she slightly pulled back, feeling ill. Ginny looked warmly into her eyes and said, "Please." Hermione gave in reluctantly, and followed the woman in front of her to her family's own plot ahead; the grief hanging over them like a thick blanket.  
  
"We don't usually come down here, so it's a bit overgrown. Mum will probably fix that problem this summer." Ginny sighed, still in a daze. "Never thought we'd have to come back so soon after Mum's brother died. Let alone for more than one person," she finished quietly. Hermione was just barely keeping the tears back as she walked up a freshly beaten path; fear gripping her like a vice. The clearing was deadly silent, except for the crunching of leaves underfoot, with faint streaks of light here and there, and the air was thick and humid. Ginny went on, "We wished you could have been here. It didn't seem right without you and Harry." She paused before she went on, "You should have seen it; there were tons of people....heh, George and Ron would have been proud." Hermione stopped walking and tried to go back. She couldn't face this.  
  
"Ginny, I don't know if I can do this right now..." Hermione's voice was shaking with stifled tears. Ginny stopped and looked back at her friend sadly.  
  
"I know....but you have to get it over with. Hermione, you need closure...Ron needs closure....please," she said pleading. "Please..." Hermione stood there shivering, though it was still very warm outside. Shadows were being thrown everywhere as the sun sank further into the horizon, and a strange chill was creeping through her body. She chewed on her bottom lip, as if thinking, and when Ginny pulled her on, she didn't resist.  
  
They rounded a particularly large oak tree and Hermione saw a larger clearing marked off with an old, black wrought-iron fence. There were already a few older headstones and to Hermione's horror, two newer ones had been placed behind two unmistakable, freshly dug mounds of rich, brown earth. The sun was streaking down in weak beams and rested on the two new graves. Hermione let out a soft gasp and leaned against the little fence for support. Tears filled her eyes to the brim, and spilled over onto her cheeks. It was a surreal dream she wanted to desperately wake up from. Her lip was quivering uncontrollably, and she shook her head in denial while Ginny came and wrapped her arms around her friend; her own eyes reddened with tears. A wide array of flowers lined the little area and covered the upper portion of the gravesites. Hermione inhaled and looked away; afraid her emotions would get the better of her. She could hardly breathe.  
  
"No," Ginny whispered softly. "You have to face it Hermione. You can't keep running away. Face it. And let go of it," Ginny's voice cracked as she stared at her older brother's graves and started to softly sob. Hermione turned her gaze back painfully and bit her lip. She couldn't help but see the boy she knew in her mind's eye, laughing and playing happily, his red hair glinting in the sun. Never again would she see his smiling face.  
  
'It's all my fault...oh God, Ron....I'm so sorry... oh God, I'm so sorry...' her knees gave out and she leaned down heavily next to Ron's grave, hot tears streaming down her face. She walked around to in front of the graves,touched the headstone and read the inscription.  
  
Ronald Arthur Weasley  
  
May 11, 1980- June 18, 2004  
  
~Beloved son and brother~  
  
In all its glory death has told,  
  
That of love, that Ronald stole.  
  
The hearts of ours, we have but lost,  
  
In time we have to heal our thoughts.  
  
Better still, the place for him,  
  
He lies so still, his grave within,  
  
This tomb so empty, yet so full,  
  
The life, the love, the man we knew.  
  
~~~  
  
Hermione clenched at her chest and bent over, one hand still on the stone. Her chest heaved with silent sobs, her back shaking, as she struggled to deal with the loss. Her mind flashed back to that night, and how Ron, Harry and she had all hugged briefly before marching out to meet the enemy. Ron had looked at her and promised he wouldn't let anything happen to her. She remembered nodding, but she had been so caught up with vengeance for her family that she had forgotten to say she would protect him too. And she didn't. Her throat hurt from holding back the scream that was trying to force its way out. It was too much, she couldn't be here, she needed to get away...'and oh, Ron....'  
  
She felt a soft hand on her shoulder, as Ginny came and sat down beside her. Hermione leaned into her as Ginny wrapped her arms back around her shoulders, rocking them. Her own face was streaked with salty tears.  
  
"I couldn't save him Ginny," Hermione whispered, choking on her building sobs. "He promised to keep me safe...he did. But...I couldn't....I was just so....forgive me, Ginny," her voice broke and she heaved great sobs into Ginny's shoulder. Ginny nodded and softly cooed to her best friend, stroking her hair.  
  
"Shh....shh, I know...you did your best, and Ron did what he had to," she assured her through her own tears. They held each other, sobbing, beside their fallen brother, until the sun had set and night took its place.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
When the first stars peaked out through the trees, Hermione felt weak and her legs were cramping from remaining in the same position for so long. Ginny was staring off into the dark when Hermione repositioned herself and looked back at Ginny.  
  
Ginny spoke quietly, "You should see Harry, you know. I think he would like that very much," she smiled weakly and looked back at her friend. Hermione's head bowed.  
  
"I would like that Gin. Is he...how is he?" Hermione said sheepishly. Ginny looked away and sighed. Hermione could smell the musky scent of wet earth and the smell of dying flowers that were littered around the headstones; she shivered.  
  
"He's there. The doctors don't really know what to do...they're all stumped." Hermione had to strain her ears to hear Ginny. The silence was pressing all around them. "He just...lies in bed. Sometimes, on his good days, he's able to sit up in bed. And he's stopped his screaming and constant muttering now." She paused considering this. "They thought that was a good sign, but I don't think so."  
  
Ginny reached down and pulled a sprig of grass up and toyed with it in her fingers. Her eyes again roved over the places her brothers were laid to rest and she sighed; scared out of her mind.  
  
"I think he's gone...I don't know. But I've told him he can't go. Hermione he can't." Ginny's lip quivered again and her voice was coated with tears. "I told him he can't...he has a reason to stay, to not give up. I need him here, I have-"she broke off and stared up at the darkened sky through the branches, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. She could just barely see some stars peeking through. Ginny thought she was going to lose her mind at any moment.  
  
Hermione broke the silence trying to sound optimistic, "I've been trying to find a way to help him; something the doctors have missed. Sev- Professor Snape is even helping me." At this Ginny looked back down to her.  
  
"He is?" She asked surprised and paused for a moment trying to gather her thoughts. "That's good. You're both very intelligent....actually that makes me feel a bit better." Ginny wanted to say that Hermione did almost anything she set her mind to. She had always admired Hermione's persistence, but if Hermione wasn't able to find a cure and if Harry were to die, she was afraid of what her friend might do when or if they lost him. 'How is it my life took such a tragic turn...' Ginny thought unfairly.  
  
After a few more minutes of silence, Ginny spoke again, "Sometimes I think he likes the break." She laughed softly; Hermione looked on sadly. She couldn't stand to talk about Harry while she was in this place. Hermione felt it was almost too risky, as if inviting trouble.  
  
"I didn't." Hermione then added looking down. "But it's so much easier. And then again, I went by my own will. And I still had my mind," Ginny nodded. Hermione looked back to her friend and thought she seemed to be struggling with something. Ginny kept opening her lips to speak, but would appear to think better of it and look away again. Hermione waited quietly as another tear slipped down Ginny's cheek and she shut her eyes tightly and whispered forcefully.  
  
"I can't lose him Hermione....I can't...." Hermione reached her hand over but Ginny brushed it off.  
  
Instead, she got up and wrapped her arms back around herself. "It's getting late, we should probably head back." Hermione looked up at her oddly, but nodded as well and stood up. Her knees protested a bit as she stood and looked back down to Ron and George's final resting places.  
  
"We'll rest up for a few days and catch up, hm? I think we need a break first, and then we'll go see Harry." Ginny finished and turned to go back out the way they came.  
  
Hermione nodded and with one final, aching glance left the little plot beneath the large oak trees, and followed Ginny out of the mournfully silent cemetery through the dark, and back to the gloomy atmosphere of the Weasley home.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
That evening, Severus Snape sat down in front of his empty stone fireplace with a snifter of brandy, and picked up his post for the day. He skimmed through letters and potions journals before noticing a small letter with black ink. There was a painfully familiar seal on the back. Severus held his breath as he opened the letter cautiously, and pulled out its folded contents. It was short and very clear:  
  
"We haven't forgotten about you Severus. Your time will come as well."  
  
It wasn't signed, but it didn't have to be. He closed his eyes; he knew a letter like this would have been coming any day now. He crumpled the parchment and tossed it into the hearth. He whispered Incendio and watched as the flames devoured the parchment and took a long gulp of the brandy. Sighing, he leaned his head back against the chair and closed his eyes.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The next morning, the girls woke late to the smells of breakfast and coffee, along with the occasional thumping sound of someone on the stairs. Hermione stretched and rolled over, hugging her pillow in her arms. She winced up at the warm sunlight that was streaming in through the aged white lace curtained windows as Ginny stirred from her own sleep. They both silently stared at each other for a moment before blinking the sleep from their eyes and going downstairs to breakfast.  
  
Hermione was the first of the two down, and had wrapped a robe around her and tied her long, sleep tousled curls into a low ponytail. She was wearing her usual fuzzy slippers and she shuffled into the kitchen, feeling like she had when she was a kid. She took her seat where she normally sat, and took the mug of coffee Bill handed her and looked at the chair Ron would have sat in. It was covered in a very fine layer of dust as it hadn't been used lately. Hermione furrowed her brow and gratefully focused on the hot liquid burning her tongue as she drank the coffee deeply.  
  
The smell of frying sausages filled the air as Molly went about setting the table. Bill laid down the paper and Hermione snatched it; deciding to see what was happening in the wizarding world post-war. After a few more minutes went by, the rest of the Weasley's made their way to the table quietly, pouring coffee and reaching for fluffy pancakes and sausages. No one said a word the entire time during breakfast, and afterwards Arthur rose, kissed his wife and looked her in the eyes. She squeezed his hand and gave him an extra kiss on the cheek and said quietly, "Good luck dear. Come home early." Her tired face was blank as she watched her husband depart, after saying goodbye to his family, and Hermione. It was the first day back at work for Mr. Weasley since the war.  
  
Ginny sat contemplating her coffee cup while the rest of the men fiddled around with their silverware and napkins. Mrs. Weasley twitched her wand and dishes flew up and towards the sink to begin washing themselves; she didn't feel like doing any real cleaning at the moment, and walked towards the cloak-rack to retrieve her cloak.  
  
"Well, I'm off to get some things in Diagon Alley. Anyone is welcome to go," Molly said, trying to sound encouraging. There were half-murmured apologies and excuses and Mrs. Weasley looked at the women hopefully. Ginny continued staring into her cup and after Hermione noticed Ginny had no intention of going with her mother, hesitatingly shook her head. Mrs. Weasley frowned, but nodded and grabbed her bag nonetheless, and Apparated.  
  
Shortly afterwards, the brothers got up and continued going about their daily routine: sitting around staring and trying not to notice things that made them think of George or Ron. Hermione tugged on Ginny's hand, pulling her to her feet, and suggested they do something productive. Ginny nodded and looked around, trying to find ideas for a project. Charlie had heard Hermione, got up and went upstairs. A few moments later he came thundering back down the stairs wearing nothing but a pair of swimming trunks and a sly grin on his already boyish face. Bill looked at him questioningly and Fred gave a weak smile. Percy just sat on the old couch and frowned. Hermione flashed a real smile at him. Charlie walked over to Bill and poked him in the chest.  
  
"Come on. Let's go swim." Bill quirked an eyebrow as if unsure. Charlie sighed exasperatedly and looked around at everyone. "Look. If we don't do something...we're not going to make it." The room was quiet for a few minutes as they let that statement soak in. They weren't sure what to think. It almost felt inappropriate or betraying. But Fred got up from the floor and nodded.  
  
"You're right, Charlie." Fred squared his shoulders and lifted his chin. "George and Ron wouldn't want us sitting around moping. Actually...if George were here, he'd probably kick us and throw us out of the house." Ginny smiled, and Bill shook his head grinning.  
  
"Alright then," said Bill, slapping his knee and standing up. "Let's go swimming." He swallowed before he went on. It had been two weeks of absolute hell and despair. It wasn't the Weasley way. "They would want us out having fun... now that the wizarding world is free." Hermione smiled again and looked at Ginny who seemed to be thinking it over. Charlie looked down to Percy. He was twisting his hands in the hem of his shirt looking absolutely torn.  
  
He wasn't ready for this yet. He wasn't like his brothers, but he couldn't go on like this either...he could feel himself dying inside. Even work wasn't helping. But Charlie was right- they weren't going to make it if something didn't happen; and soon. Percy stood slowly as well and looked at his siblings.  
  
"Okay," he said quietly. Fred slapped Percy on the shoulder, to which Percy scowled at, and he and Bill quickly ran up the stairs. Percy walked calmly. Then Charlie looked at his little sister and Hermione.  
  
"You two have to come as well," he said grinning again. Ginny strode over to her brother and hugged him. He hugged her fiercely back and released her and she went upstairs to find a bathing suit. Hermione followed and gave a proud look to Charlie. He smiled and went to stare out the window while everyone else changed.  
  
When they came back, Fred, in a daring leap, pushed Charlie and ran towards the pond at the edge of the Weasley property. Charlie yelled good-naturedly and tore after Fred. Crookshanks appeared out of seemingly nowhere, and bounded away after them. Bill and Percy shook their heads but remained walking with the girls, while Hermione smiled at her cat. When they got there, Fred and Charlie were already battling and splashing around in the water; Hermione laughed, feeling much better already. Everyone but Ginny got in, and of course all the men went after Hermione. Dunking her, tossing her playfully, and laughing. It was the first time the family had truly felt better. Ginny could hear her father's voice sounding in her head, 'Laughter truly is the best medicine...never forget that, Ginny...' She smiled as Percy got dunked and came up yelling and spluttering.  
  
After about ten more minutes, Bill spoke up and looked at the still dry Ginny. "Oy! When ya comin' in little sister!? Better be quick, or I'll help you in myself!" he laughed.  
  
"Yeah! Water's real fine, Gin!" came Fred before he went back under to grab Percy's leg and pull him back down. Ginny looked at them a little apprehensively but edged towards the shore and stuck a toe in. Fred was right- the water was perfect. She pursed her lips thinking.  
  
"If I do...you guys can't swarm all over me like you're doing to poor Hermione. I'm not in the mood," she tried to say as seriously as she could while smiling. The boys all spoke in tandem, "Ohh okaayyy..." Ginny glared at them accusingly and stepped in, staying away from all the commotion. Hermione finally got out of Charlie's grip, and stuck her tongue out at him playfully and swam over to where Ginny was sitting in the shallow end. She sat up panting. She was having so much fun. It had been a couple years since she had gotten to swim; especially with the Weasley's.  
  
Hermione reached around her back as she came to a halt to fix the top half of her Transfigured bikini. She noticed Ginny wore a one-piece. 'She was always so shy...poor girl,' she thought warily. Ginny's hands were immersed under the cloudy water.  
  
"What's up Ginny? Not feel well?"  
  
"I just don't feel like being thrown about thanks," she giggled as the boys were attempting to drown each other. Hermione shook her head.  
  
"Okay, but are you going to join us?" she asked giving her a light shove. Ginny shoved back.  
  
"Maybe," she grinned. Suddenly it got quiet. They both noticed this and looked up. The boys were gone. They looked around frantically, Ginny calling out.  
  
"What are you doing?! Come back up..." They still didn't appear. "Uh-oh," Ginny began as she started to get out of the water. But then four pairs of hands were grasping at their ankles and dragging them under. Hermione yelped and Ginny screamed, frantically clawing at the muddy shore behind her. They were pulled under-water, by very satisfied Weasley brothers, almost a little too long. Charlie grabbed Ginny around the waist attempting to tickle her underwater- knowing it would get her riled up, until she kicked him in the stomach. Hermione came up trying not to laugh while the rest of the boys laughed at their little stunt. But Charlie came up coughing, rubbing his stomach. Ginny yelled at them all and swore; seeming very upset, and swam back to shore. Once there, she Accio'd a beach towel and stamped her foot angrily while she waited for it to show up. The boys all groaned.  
  
"Come on Gin, we were just playing..." said Bill.  
  
"Really? Well I didn't think it was very funny, Bill!" she yelled. Everyone blinked, but Ginny went on. "You said you wouldn't attack me! That's exactly why I stayed away from you. But you can't even obey a simple wish!" She went on muttering angrily, clutching her abdomen, sure there was a bruise there, and grabbed the flying towel hurtling towards her. They thought they heard her say something like 'thoughtless gits' as she wrapped it around her waist, slipped on her shoes and stalked off back up to the house. Crookshanks, who had been basking in the sun, well away from any stray drops of water, got up and trotted after her. The men looked alarmed at Ginny's sudden behaviour and looked at Hermione. She shrugged and they went back to swimming. Hermione stayed around for a few more minutes before she got out and went to look for Ginny.  
  
Ginny had changed into dry clothes and was applying a drying charm to her hair when Hermione got to her room.  
  
"Ginny? Um, are you okay?" she looked at her still angry friend. Ginny rolled her eyes and began brushing out her long red-gold hair.  
  
"I hate it when they do things like that..." she said. Hermione just looked at her friend questioningly but let it drop.  
  
Later that evening, when Mrs. Weasley came home to her children outside in dry swimming trunks and talking somewhat animatedly, she felt a great weight lift off her shoulders. Ginny was wearing a pair of jean shorts and a checked top that tied in the front, and lounging on a rickety porch swing with Hermione. Fred was zapping slugs and making sure they exploded near Percy who kept swearing frustratingly at him. Bill was smiling, watching Charlie as he kept flirting with Hermione playfully, and teasing Ginny. Ginny had somewhat calmed down since that afternoon, and had even joined in on his teasing. Mrs. Weasley watched them for a few minutes before going to the kitchen get started on dinner. When Mr. Weasley came home, his children and Hermione were just coming in, laughing at something Fred had said, with slight sunburns on their freckly faces. He looked at them curiously, and felt his chest tighten. He smiled, and blinked back tears before turning to his wife, hugging her gratefully.  
  
That night, dinner was much more enjoyable, with a lot more conversation; even sharing a few laughs. Charlie caught Hermione's eye and smiled thankfully at her before going back to listen to his father discuss an incident that had occurred at work today. When dinner was over, and the dishes were done, everyone stayed up late to talk and play a few games. Percy dug out his dust-covered chess set and Fred grabbed a deck of Exploding Snap cards.  
  
The next couple of days went by in much the same fashion. Each day, the family healed a bit more, getting a bit stronger, and tried to move on with their lives. Mrs. Weasley's fussing over the girls' weight got stricter and she baked the most fattening pies and desserts she could think of. However, it appeared to be working, much to Hermione's chagrin. Ginny had continued to stay home more often, popping in to see Harry every night before she went to bed. Hermione had owled Severus, asking him to send her some of her research on Harry's affliction, so she could at least be doing something productive. He had responded the next day, with her notes meticulously separated, with a terse message telling her not to over do it. She had smiled. Despite the slowly cheering mood of the Weasley household, Hermione still missed him. She hadn't seen Severus in four days and was beginning to get lonely for his presence. And Charlie's good-natured flirtations made it worse. She peered out the window of Ginny's room and down at the men as they had just started a small Quidditch match with their father, and looked at Charlie. He really was an attractive man, and he had a great personality. She thought if she hadn't become attached to Severus, she might have taken a go at Charlie. She wondered if it would've worked out in the long-run though. Unbidden, Severus' image floated to the front of her mind and she closed her eyes. She wondered what he would be doing at that moment on a Saturday night. She imagined him at his workbench in his lab cutting up some kind of root, about to scrape it into a softly simmering cauldron. Maybe his forehead would be sweating and he'd reach one his long- fingered hands to wipe at it, and secure a loose lock of raven black hair behind his ear. Hermione smiled softly, suppressing a shiver and reached a hand up to her face, remembering when his hands had held hers and he'd kissed her cheek with his warm lips-  
  
"Ahem?" coughed Ginny. Hermione jumped. Ginny was standing with her arms folded, and a sly glare on her face staring at her from a few feet away. She looked at Hermione expectantly. "Who was the subject of that fantasy missy? I hope to God it's not someone down there?" she smirked playfully and glanced out the window, then back to her friend. "Then again...could it have been my dragon-loving brother who has captured your affections?" she poked Hermione on the arm. Hermione arched an eyebrow and poked back, grinning.  
  
"What makes you so sure I was fantasizing, Virginia?" Ginny pursed her lips knowingly. "Sorry to disappoint you, Miss Weasley." She looked back out the window while Ginny watched her carefully. Then she added, "It wasn't about, Charlie, anyway." Ginny gasped and grabbed Hermione's hands, spinning her around to face her.  
  
"Uh-huh, I knew it! You tell me all about it!" Ginny was grinning from ear to ear, looking mischievous. Hermione was the one to purse her lips this time and fold her arms over her chest.  
  
"It isn't what you're thinking, Ginny."  
  
"Fine. If you're going to be stubborn about it." She calmly let her arms swing at her sides as she pretended to scan a list of possible men Hermione would fantasize about. Sadly, that list was short. She walked around her room, and named off the most unlikely people first.  
  
"Who have you seen lately...hm..."she gasped sarcastically, "Neville Longbottom!" Hermione laughed and looked away.  
  
"Honestly, Ginny...we are adults, not teenagers," she playfully chastised.  
  
"Okay, okay...hm...Seamus?" Hermione stared blankly. "Dean Thomas? What about that one Ravenclaw you had a crush on in your sixth year..." Hermione laughed. Ginny turned away from her and smiled evilly. "Oh, who am I kidding? He's not your type, with his blond hair and pretty blue eyes...no. You're a more serious person...perhaps, your preferences fall into the...tall, dark, and brooding-yet-sexy category?" She turned around smugly to face Hermione. Whose expression became that of blank surprise.  
  
"Bingo," whispered Ginny.  
  
Hermione spluttered and looked at her friend questioningly.  
  
"Okay, I give. When you first arrived here, Mum saw Professor Snape give you a kiss on the cheek before he left, and she told me about it. That, and you almost called him Severus once." Ginny looked faintly proud. Hermione blushed. "Okay though, tell me all the details. When did this happen, for one."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and sat down on the bed. "Nothing has 'happened.' We're....friends." she said dejectedly. Ginny smiled sympathetically.  
  
"Not by your choice though."  
  
"I'm not sure what to make of it. Actually, I still can't believe it myself."  
  
"I can," Ginny said matter-of-factly. "You two are perfect for each other. Especially for you. He's very smart, well-read, powerful...stimulating," on the last adjective she winked and purred suggestively. Hermione blushed again. "Physically and mentally I'm sure." Hermione shook her head disbelieving.  
  
"Has he kissed you yet?"  
  
"Ginny!" Ginny laughed.  
  
"Oh fine. You're no fun anyways. So he is made for you then." Hermione threw a pillow at her. They sat in companionable silence for a bit.  
  
"I am too fun..." said Hermione mock pouting. Ginny smiled.  
  
"Of course you are love." She sighed. Ginny looked at a small picture frame on her windowsill behind Hermione. A young man of about 20, with jet black hair and bright green eyes, was smiling and winking at her. "I think we should see Harry tomorrow. It's time." Hermione looked up at her, startled. Then she looked down at the floral patterned bedspread and traced the stem of a rose with her finger.  
  
"It is. When do you-"Ginny cut her off.  
  
"Tomorrow afternoon." Ginny's voice had a hardened quality to it as she stared at the picture Harry had given her a few years ago. Her eyes looked glazed and her hand strayed to her stomach. She again struggled to say something and opened her mouth a few times before dropping her head in defeat.  
  
"He's still not getting better, Hermione," she whispered. Hermione felt a stab of guilt- she should be gathering more information, or researching, or doing something more to help Harry instead of being here. She fidgeted uneasily at this thought. Ginny, sensing Hermione's distress looked back up into her face.  
  
"It's okay, Hermione. You needed to be here." Ginny looked into her eyes. "I'm glad you're here. I needed you." She paused. "And so did everyone else I think," she smiled at her best friend. Hermione smiled back and looked at the hand on Ginny's tummy.  
  
"Do you feel okay?" She had noticed Ginny seemed a bit ill lately.  
  
Ginny looked at her hand for a second. "Oh, yeah. My stomach has been a bit off lately. Mum gave me an upset stomach potion this morning; it's helped a lot." Hermione nodded.  
  
Ginny got up off the bed and looked at Hermione. "Tomorrow will be hard for you. He's so different...." Hermione nodded again, her chest tight.  
  
"Do you mind...can I bring Severus along? I don't know how to explain it, but, I always feel stronger when he's around." Ginny nodded compassionately.  
  
"Of course." With that she turned and left her bedroom, leaving Hermione to follow after.  
  
~*~*  
  
Later that night, after everyone had retired to bed, Hermione quietly crept down to the living room, lit the fireplace, and grabbed a pinch of floo powder off a jar on the mantle.  
  
"Severus Snape," she announced quietly to the warm green flames. It took a moment for the flames to die down before Hermione poked her head in. Looking around she noticed she was staring into his private living quarters, instead of his office. She thought it was very nicely decorated, and could see he definitely valued comfort despite his harsh personality. The room appeared to be empty of his presence however, so she tried to call out to him as quietly as she could without waking anyone in the Burrow.  
  
"Severus? Hallo?" She paused, waiting for him to answer. When he didn't she tried again a bit louder, "Severus? Are you here...." She trailed off as a door to her right opened up and a pale face peeked out from behind it. Severus relaxed and stepped out, pocketing what appeared to be his wand. Then she noticed he had his shirt off and was wearing a pair of long, black, cotton pyjama bottoms. Her throat tightened, and the familiar pull in her belly made itself known. He looked very lean, even with a nice bit of muscle on his chest and arms. Through the glint of the green firelight she made out a slight dusting of fine black hair on his chest, and a very little bit just above the waistline of his pants....  
  
He quickly walked over to her, looking alarmed.  
  
"Hermione? What is it? Is something wrong?" he asked a bit urgently, his voice groggy. She was still staring at his chest. He looked down, and cleared his throat, amused.  
  
"What? Oh, oh...no. No, you told me to floo if I needed you." She looked up into his eyes, hoping the green of the flames hid her embarrassment. He looked at her and nodded slowly.  
  
"Yes?" he asked encouragingly.  
  
"Well..." she trailed off and he raised his eyebrows. "I need you," she said quietly. He looked taken aback. No one had ever said that to him like that. Dumbledore maybe...but never in a soft, desperate kind of way before. He nodded again.  
  
"I see.... What can I help you with?" He briefly wondered if he should ask her in, but figured she would have already asked to if she was in need. So he instead decided to listen to her as she was.  
  
"Well, I have a favour to ask of you." He looked at her suspiciously but nodded his assent.  
  
"Tomorrow, Ginny and I are going to visit Harry..." she ended looking down. Here she seemed to struggle for the right words. "And, well, I was wondering..." 'Oh, this is ridiculous. You're an adult, Granger. The worst he can do is say no,' she chided herself, then looked up into his eyes. "Would you please come with me tomorrow?"  
  
He calmly met her gaze and considered her for a moment, trying to understand what that meant. Then before he even really thought any further about it, he was nodding and speaking. "Of course. When and where shall I meet you?"  
  
She smiled, relieved, "We're leaving the Weasley's at two o'clock tomorrow afternoon. Could you meet us there?"  
  
He nodded, "That would be fine." Her tousled hair was spilling into her eyes, and she brushed them aside. He would have liked to have done that for her- blinking, he cut that thought off.  
  
She smiled warmly up at him from the hearth while he looked at her face. She seemed to be okay, but there was definite apprehension in her eyes. He knew tomorrow would be hard for her, and it gave him a strangely warm feeling inside to know she wanted him there with her. He cleared his throat, now being satisfied that she was okay.  
  
"Well, two o'clock tomorrow it is." She lifted her chin in assertion.  
  
"Yes. Well....until tomorrow then."  
  
"Tomorrow. Goodnight, Hermione."  
  
"Goodnight, Severus." She lingered for a few more moments before leaning out of the warm flames, and extinguishing the fire. She thought he seemed a bit different tonight, but she shrugged it off and as quietly as she could, tip-toed back up the stairs, past the sleeping Weasley's, and back into Ginny's room. She looked down, and brushed the soot off of her cotton nightgown before slipping under the covers. When she finally closed her eyes, her mind's eye full of a partially clothed Severus, she fell soundly asleep, grinning. Ginny closed her eyes as well, smiling.  
  
Back at Hogwarts, Severus had stood standing, staring into the once again empty hearth, where her face had been just moments before. The circles under her eyes had appeared to be gone, and her face looked fuller. He was glad to see her looking better now. Snape inhaled deeply, and turned around to go back to his bed. He flopped down on the mattress, the satin having cooled from the night air, and looked out of his window again. It was open, and the sheer, green curtains were lightly floating in the slight breeze. The sound of crickets filled the air, and the smell of dew covered grass wafted in. His emotions again raged in his chest as he thought about Hermione.  
  
"Tomorrow," he said quietly and raised his arms up over his head and closed his eyes. He opened one eye, twitched his hand, deadening the softly glowing candles in the sconces, and tried to once again fall asleep.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Hermione awoke, feeling refreshed from a good night's sleep the next morning. She looked over at the little travel alarm clock on her bedside table; eleven o'clock; 'Wow, I really slept in,' she thought hastily. She looked up as Ginny came into the room, still in her robe; she, however, looked a bit tired. Hermione wondered if she had gotten much sleep last night. She looked at Ginny questioningly, but Ginny gave her a weak smile, and then quickly left the room. Hermione stared at the closed door for a moment before rising to get out of bed and take a shower. Once done with that, she shuffled back into Ginny's room and over to the closet where she had hung some of her own clothes, and selected a light pink, floral chiffon dress. It was very simple, but pretty nonetheless. She preferred Muggle clothing, when she could. Once that was on, she slipped on a pair of sandals, and twisted her hair up out of her face, pulling a few curly strands at the side and back out. Then, she applied a very small amount of makeup since she was actually leaving the house. Though it didn't matter, she wanted to look decent for Harry. So he would see she was okay, and maybe encourage him. She sighed. She didn't know what to expect; from him or herself. And the more she kept thinking about it, the more she worried, and the more upset she got. She kept seeing her father's lifeless body, and couldn't help but see Harry in the same position. She closed her eyes, and walked out of the tiny bedroom to go downstairs for a late breakfast.  
  
Upon entering the kitchen, Bill and Charlie started whistling, complete with catcalls. She flashed them a flirtatious smile, desperate to feel as calm as she looked right then. Bill sidled up to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and speaking into her ear.  
  
"Hermione...my goodness, you are a sight for sore eyes this afternoon."  
  
"Morning," she corrected him tartly.  
  
"Oh yes, my apologies," he drawled sarcastically. She smiled up at him and flicked his earring playfully, which he had replaced the dragon's fang for a small bloodstone.  
  
Charlie, not to be outdone, calmly walked over to his oldest brother, removed his hand, unceremoniously, and wrapped his own arm around her waist, and looked over her head to his brother's amused one.  
  
"Hermione can get up whenever she so chooses, Bill." He grinned down at her; she couldn't help but grin back. "Isn't that right?" Bill, sensing a chance for playful banter, untucked Charlie's arm, from around her waist and pulled her back to him. She laughed.  
  
"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to offend you, Hermione. Forgive me," using his free arm, he reached around and brought her hand up to his lips, kissing it. Hermione quirked an eyebrow at Bill, then looked expectantly at Charlie for his response. She was actually enjoying this attention.  
  
"Hm." He walked around behind her, bumped Bill out of the way, and wrapped both of his arms around Hermione's waist, pulling her to his chest. She was giggling as he said, "I don't know why you bother with him. You should stick with me kid. I'm the legendary Charlie Weasley, or didn't you know that?" he purred.  
  
'Hello!' Hermione thought shamelessly. Fred, having heard their mock-fight, had bent down and picked up a ball of yarn, and threw it directly at Charlie's head. He blinked a few times, and smiling broadly looked into the living room at Fred, who was looking at him innocently. Everyone laughed.  
  
Charlie released her and joined Bill back at the table, and she sat down for some coffee and toast. Her nerves were still on edge, and she didn't want to tempt fate by eating too much. Crookshanks began mewing outside the back door. She grabbed a couple of cold sausages from a plate, and went to the door to toss them to her pet. He purred, then mewed a 'hello' and savagely tore in to the sausages.  
  
Finally Ginny emerged from downstairs, dressed in a pair of jeans, and loose grey sweatshirt, with the letters, UML, (University of Magical London) across the front. Hermione frowned.  
  
"Don't you think you'll get hot in that sweatshirt, Ginny?" Ginny shook her head as she plopped down into her chair and reached for the marmalade. Bill, Charlie and Hermione all gave her a worried look. Ginny slammed her spoon down on the table, and sighed loudly at them. Bill and Charlie looked at each other then away. Hermione gave them both another look and went to sit back down at her spot with her cooling mug of coffee. The two brothers got up and silently left the kitchen. Ginny dribbled marmalade onto her piece of toast with a shaking hand, which Hermione noticed.  
  
"Okay. Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"  
  
"I told you, Hermione. I just don't feel well is all. That and I didn't get much sleep last night." She took a bite of her toast. Hermione watched her, as if trying to read her mind. "Are you going to stare at me the entire time?" Ginny gave her a half-smile around another bite of toast.  
  
Hermione waited a second, and then poured herself some more coffee, adding a bit of milk and sugar. "I suppose not." She took a sip and leaned back in her chair, drumming her fingers on the mug. "Severus is coming with us. You don't mind do you?" At this Ginny looked up. She wiped at her mouth with a napkin and smiled slyly.  
  
"Of course not." Then her smile faded. "You'll need him," she added quietly. Hermione looked away out the window while Ginny ate the rest of her toast.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The rest of the afternoon, Hermione spent looking back over the notes Severus had sent to her earlier. Mrs. Weasley had decided to come for Ginny, and said she hadn't seen Harry in a couple of days anyways. Ginny spent it looking over Hermione's shoulder, and when she noticed Hermione kept making frustrated noises because she wasn't getting anywhere, she had slumped over, depressingly, on the couch, and stared off into space. The guys had all gone outside to do some yard work for their mother.  
  
When two o'clock finally rolled around, Hermione had been so immersed in her reading that she missed the sound of the knock at the door and Ginny answering it. It wasn't until a shadow fell across the parchments that she even registered that Severus was even there.  
  
"I thought I told you to take it easy," he drawled. She smiled and stood up, holding on to her parchments. She wanted to hug him, but opted for standing closely to him.  
  
"Hello," she said quietly.  
  
"Hello." They stood staring at each other for a moment until Percy came in from the garden.  
  
"Professor Snape?" he asked surprised. Severus turned and looked into the face of his former student and Hogwarts Head Boy. He stretched out his hand to Percy in greeting.  
  
"Mr. Weasley. I trust you are doing well." Percy shook his hand and nodded.  
  
"Better sir, thank you." He looked around, confused as to why his former Potions professor was in his home, when his mother came in clutching a large bag. He noticed his sister casually leaning against the doorway.  
  
"Severus, welcome back," Molly exclaimed. Snape turned and briefly smiled at the woman and shook her hand as well.  
  
"Thank you for having me, Molly," he said politely.  
  
"Not at all. We're happy to have you with us." She looked around and noticed her son's bewildered expression. "Professor Snape is coming with us to St. Mungo's, Percy." Percy nodded slowly and looked curiously at his old professor, then noticed Hermione staring at the older man.  
  
"Ah. Well, have a safe trip then," and he headed towards the kitchen.  
  
Shortly afterwards, Snape, Hermione, Ginny and Mrs. Weasley went out the front door and Apparated to St. Mungo's. They arrived in a dark alley just to the side of the entrance to the old warehouse that was St. Mungo's. Ginny stared at it in sadness, while Mrs. Weasley put her arm around her shoulders and led her through the entrance. Hermione paused, staring up at the decrepit old building. She had only been here a time or two. The last time she had was to sign off on the medical examiners report, verifying her parent's mangled bodies. She sharply inhaled at the memory, and presently felt Snape's firm hand on the small of her back. Strong, yet reassuring. She bit back the tears, and looked up at him gratefully; he nodded and gave her a slight smile, and gestured them on. As they walked, Snape's hand stayed on her back.  
  
They arrived at the front desk, Ginny signing in for them, and a short witch in lime-green medical robes led them through the double doors of the reception room and up a steep stairway, made a right, and then took them down a long corridor on the Fourth floor. Hermione saw through various doors' windows some of the patients in this ward. Some of them were completely neurotic in behaviour; Hermione felt a sharp stab of pain. Harry was among these people. She shook her head and wiped at a tear. Snape gently rubbed a small circle on her back, and he noticed as they walked, she had leaned closer into him. Halfway down the corridor, the medi-witch turned right, and brought out a large ring of old-fashioned keys. She said a small incantation and whispered something to Ginny. Ginny nodded and stepped through the open door, followed by Molly. Snape looked down to Hermione, ready whenever she was, but not pushing. However, after a few moments, Hermione still had not moved.  
  
***  
  
"Harry Potter! You come to finally meet your death..." The high-pitched raspy voice rang out in the room.  
  
"Crucio!" The curse was directed at Hermione and she screamed and convulsed under it while Voldemort laughed. Harry fought against the chains that held him to the wall.  
  
"Leave her alone you bastard!"....  
  
***  
  
The memory faded, and Hermione twitched under Snape's hand. He stopped his hand's movement, and removed it from her back. He took a breath and stepped in front of Hermione's line of vision to Harry's hospital room door.  
  
Severus looked down patiently at her, with an encouraging expression, "It's just a visit." She blinked as if just noticing he was there. He added quietly taking her hands and rubbing her knuckles with his thumb, "You can't hide from him forever, Hermione. Come." She let him lead her forward, and his hand resumed its place on the small of her back and they stepped in through the doorway.  
  
Hermione's whole body was tense, as she hesitantly looked around the room. The walls were covered with padding, as was the floor. There were no windows, and she speculated why this was. The colour of the room was a light, dull grey. Finally, she turned her gaze towards the centre of the room to the bed by the wall. There were some kind of magical monitoring devices spinning and glowing beside the bed, and a catheter tube poked out under the covers. Ginny was seated in a chair by the bedside, holding Harry's hands; Mrs. Weasley standing behind her, dabbing at her eyes. Hermione let her eyes fall on Harry. She gasped and leaned back into Severus. He stilled, supporting her, his free hand grasping her elbow.  
  
"This isn't Harry..." she mouthed quietly, her voice filled with heart clenching sorrow. Snape swallowed as he looked at the young man who was barely recognizable, and shook his head sadly. He had avoided seeing the outcome of the Death-Eater's "play things" as much as he could in his life. It made him sick to his stomach.  
  
Hermione's breath hitched in her throat. "His eyes...." She took a small step forward, shaking her head, unbelieving. His skin was pale, whereas it had been tan. His hair was longer, and uncut, Ginny had to brush it to the side to keep it out of his face. His cheeks were hollowed, collarbones poking out through his flesh, as he sat propped up on a pillow, his mouth slack- jawed. And his eyes....his once bright, lively eyes....were glazed, and un- seeing. A pale grey line marked one side of his face- where Voldemort had touched him.  
  
Hermione's eyes felt hot with tears, and her throat tightened as she took another step towards her best friend. She continued shaking her head, her sight blurred with salty tears.  
  
"Harry." His glazed eyes continued staring at nothing. "Harry," she said more desperate. Ginny looked away, while Molly was trying to decide whether to go to Hermione, or stay holding her daughter. "Harry, no," she cried incredibly. She had fully expected him to pull through; to show some semblance of hope. He always did. He survived. He had his whole life, so why should it be different now? The very real fact that he didn't show that faint glimmer of hope rocked her entire being. Hermione's knees felt weak, and Snape noticed her sway and quickly pulled up a chair for her to slump into. She did and leaned over Harry, grabbing a hold of his right hand. Her eyes ran over Harry's pathetic face, and her tears dripped onto his cheeks. She bowed her head, laying her cheek on Harry's cold hand and squeezed her eyes shut.  
  
"If...I only... would... have thought-"she forced out but couldn't speak anymore as a sob began pushing its way out of her very being. She kept his hand pressed to her face as she let the tears come and the painful sounds of heartache ripped through her throat. And she cried. It was at that moment, looking at Harry, her best friend, her first lover, partner-in-crime, Boy- Who-Fucking-Lived, that she felt the full force of all the pain, all the suffering, all the loss she had undergone throughout the past few months. Her parents, their rape and deaths. Her own rape and the death of her innocence. She cried for Ron, and Fred. And how she couldn't save Ron, or prevent the tragedy that had befallen Harry. She cried for the lives of the many other friends and teachers that had been lost. She cried for the Weasley's, and the sons that had been taken from them, and the pain they were forced to endure for the rest of their lives. She would never see Ron again. Never hear George and Fred speak the same words at the same time ever again. The pain in her heart was tangible, Hermione couldn't take it. Why couldn't she find a cure for Harry? What was she missing! "Why..." she moaned loudly.  
  
Ginny grasped Hermione's hand and silently sobbed on the other side of the bed watching her. Hermione's chest continued to shake with fury, and right as Molly couldn't stand to leave Hermione alone another second, Severus moved in and bent down on his knees to hold her as she cried. Had it not been such a heart-rending moment, Molly might have been surprised. Instead she gripped her only daughter's shoulders tighter and closed her eyes. Her heart was breaking for everyone in the room.  
  
Snape held Hermione for an interminable amount of time until she wore herself out. And even still she cried, though there were no more tears. There was only empty, hollow, pain. Keeping hold of Harry's hand, she leaned into the warm embrace Severus offered to her. She barely even registered what it had taken for him to do this for her. She sat, rubbing Harry's hand, praying to every deity, to God, to help her. To help Harry.  
  
Snape smoothed the hair that had clung to her tear-streaked face, out of the way, and pressed her cheek into his chest. She gratefully accepted the comfort; even if she was half-numb from shock. He had never seen anyone suffer so much heartache in his entire life. His whole being shook to the core when her muffled sobs echoed in his chest. Her hurt for her. He didn't want her to suffer. He didn't know what it was inside of him that automatically kicked in, and made him go to her, and to have this incredible urge to not want her to hurt anymore. So he held her, until she stopped all movement in his arms. He didn't even notice Molly Weasley come up behind him and bend down to his ear, and he jumped at her soft words.  
  
"Take her home, Severus." He nodded, not needing another word to gather her up in his arms and take her away. He looked despondently back to Ginny who nodded and went to stare back at Harry. He turned and quickly strode out the door with Hermione still in his arms. When he reached the end of the corridor, he stepped onto the revolving staircase to get back to the main floor, and out the front doors. She was still quietly shaking and had wrapped her arms around his neck, her face buried just under his chin.  
  
Once outside, he whispered into her hair, "Please hold on..." and he closed his eyes, leaning his cheek against hers, and slipped a hand, carefully, into the folds of his robes to latch onto a portkey each of the staff had for emergencies, and held on while they were taken back to their home.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
When they had reached the gates of Hogwarts he immediately went through them, not bothering to see if Hermione could walk. Snape was worried about her. Her movements in his arms were becoming less and less, and her breathing seemed shallow. As soon as they got in the castle he was going to take her to Madam Pomfrey.  
  
The sun was just starting to settle in the West, and the castle threw large shadows over the grounds. When they approached the front steps, he shifted her in his arms a bit, and then continued on up to the great oak front doors. No one was in the entry hall. He carried her up the main staircase and down the hall to the Hospital Wing, bursting through the doors. He just hoped Poppy would have something to ease her mind, lest she start to go back into the coma she had used before.  
  
"Poppy!" he called as he lay her gently down on the nearest bed. Hermione clutched at his robes, not wanting him to leave her. He continued softly, "I'm just going to get Poppy. I'll be right back."  
  
"Don't leave me..." she said weakly, still holding onto the front of his robes. He was leaning over her at an awkward angle while he looked around the room, then back to her.  
  
"Very well." He placed a hand on one side of her body, his other stroking her cheek; she snuggled up to his arm, another tear slipping out of her lashes. "Poppy?!" he called again. 'Why isn't she answering?' he thought angrily. He tried to think about where she could be....and then realized the women had said something that morning about going into Hogsmeade.  
  
"Damnit," he whispered fiercely. Hermione winced and continued to shake. Snape reached down to feel her pulse; weak but steady. "You will not go back there, Hermione," he stated rather harshly.  
  
He went to the fireplace at one end of the room, grabbed a pinch of floo powder from the nondescript box on the mantle, and threw it in. He quietly announced his room, then went back to scoop Hermione back up into his arms. She whimpered and placed her face back into the crook of his neck. He tucked them into the fireplace and was immediately taken into his private quarters.  
  
Through the haze, Hermione was vaguely aware as to where she was. She felt slick, cool sheets under her suddenly instead of Severus' warm, strong arms. She shivered and huddled into her self. She just wanted to give in again.  
  
"Too much..." she whispered. Harry's ruined appearance floated back to her. She twisted her face side to side, "no no nonononono..." A hand stopped her head from thrashing about and she looked up.  
  
"I want you to drink this. But you have to promise me, you will not use this to hurt yourself." Snape had a small vial of a weaker version of the Fulcio potion to give her some strength. Hermione looked at him blankly, but drank the potion anyways. He set the empty vial aside, and watched as some colour came back into her face. He sat on the edge of his bed, where he had laid Hermione and took hold of her hands.  
  
"How do you feel?" he asked. She looked miserable; he wanted to take that away from her. His thumbs automatically started soothing her hands in large circles. She didn't respond for a bit.  
  
"I wish I didn't. I don't." she said quietly. Then she sat up and scooted away from him to the other side of the bed. "I can't take this!! Did you see him? Harry!" She wiped angrily at her tears, starting to feel the warmth from the potion beginning kick in. Snape sat where he was, watching her quietly.  
  
"I did." He answered, and she shook her head. "Hermione...I don't know what you're thinking...but whatever you do think...you have to realize it's not you fault. Harry knew what he was doing. There was nothing you could do for him."  
  
She hung her head and whispered softly, "Why does everyone I love die?" Tears fell from her lashes again and she didn't stop them. Her chest was tightening, and she inhaled. "Why did I lose everything? Why!" She got up with a pained scream and stalked to the fireplace. He stared at her sadly.  
  
"I hate this! All of this! I want out!" This time Severus got up, frightened by her words, and went to her.  
  
"So you would rather just quit? Give up? Not very Gryffindor of you is it?" He sneered.  
  
"Who cares?! Why do you care? Just one more defeat for me. Not living up to my expectations. Well damn! Maybe I can banish any shred of hope anyone has left in me, and be properly miserable!"  
  
A thousand different scathing words to say, ticked on his tongue, but he wouldn't say any of them. She was letting go again. Something, deep in his chest registered that fact; and it actually scared him. It stirred up his insides; because he knew this time they wouldn't be able to get her back. And he felt a profound loss, deep inside and had to act. Every fibre of him wanted to reach out to her, make her feel something other than pain. Hell, he wanted to feel that. He said the only words that seemed fitting now.  
  
"I care," and he was shocked when he realized those words were true. He cared enough to not want her to leave. Whether it be him, or this world. A light went off in his mind. He wanted her here. With him preferably. He really wanted her there! He wanted to give in and feel, really feel. Feel love, feel joy! And his heart screamed out that she could be the one to give him that. And here she was, wanting to throw everything away. That couldn't happen. He wouldn't let it happen. He quickly closed the space between them, and grabbed her shoulders, looking deep into her eyes. Her mouth was slightly open, staring back at him.  
  
"I care, Hermione," he repeated. She closed her lips and glared at him.  
  
"Really! One would never tell, Severus! I certainly couldn't, what with how you ignore me! See a damaged figure, eh?" She yelled at him. She closed her eyes to escape those piercing orbs of his and said softly. "I do."  
  
His hands slid down, to firmly grasp her upper arms and he moved his face closely to in front of hers, "You are not damaged. Look at me." Reluctantly she did. "You can have so much...you can have more." She shook her head, and turned to move; afraid the feel of him would keep her there. She just wanted out. However, his grip tightened on her arms again.  
  
"Don't leave," he almost pleaded. Hermione stopped; something in his voice touched her.  
  
Her voice trembled as she spoke, "Why Severus? Why? You'll just leave me too. Everyone does." Her voice cracked and she closed her eyes; his heart wrenched again. "They always do," she sniffed and opened her eyes again shaking her head. Her curls had escaped their confinement and softly fell about her face. "Then what will I have? There is nothing....you would be taken from me too. There is nothing in me anymore." She wriggled an arm free and turned to leave him, but he kept her other hand and pulled back.  
  
'Now or never, Severus...'  
  
"No," he said darkly, and then jerked her back to him. She gasped and was flung into his chest, her back moulding into his stomach. The hand that held hers pressed into her torso, holding her there, while his other hand came up and rested on her belly. Hermione inhaled when he pressed into her soft flesh. He leaned his face next to ear, tilting her head. Hermione's heart rate quickened, what was going on....  
  
"You don't understand." He breathed her scent in deeply and nuzzled her hair. Her own breath caught. "You can't leave. You don't get it, Hermione." His voice rumbled in her chest, and his right hand that held hers captive began moving up to her wrist, then back down to capture her fingers in his, blazing fire on her skin.  
  
Hermione's mouth worked silently, her brain having thoroughly been confused. He smiled against her bewilderment, and nuzzled just behind her ear. "You belong here, Hermione. With me," his tongue darted out to lick the outer curve of her ear. She gasped; her legs starting to melt right there, but she was still frozen in place. He chuckled, darkly. "You see?" His mouth barely skimmed down the side of her throat until it got to the hollow. His lips brushed her neck as he spoke, "You know it. That's why you're still here. Isn't it, my dear?" and he softly kissed her throat. Hermione swore his lips were made of flame.  
  
She made a soft, inarticulate sound, which made him chuckle again. "What was that?" he said against her neck, still kissing.  
  
Hermione tried to clear her throat, and began again. "I don't know..." but Severus continued as though he hadn't heard her. The hand that was pressed into her belly, made its way down to her hip, pressing her bottom into his groin, Hermione inhaled again.  
  
He went on. "But, what I don't understand....is why you keep trying to run away. It's most confusing, Hermione. You pursue me," at this she tried to make a sound of protest, "then you hide...and then you try to get to me again...and now you're trying to run away." He kissed just behind her ear, and she whimpered. He smiled. She was doing exactly what he wanted her to. "You're such a confusing girl. Perhaps, I can figure you out, hm?" The hand at her hip moved lower still, running over the top of her thigh, and she twitched under it. He brought it slowly, roughly, back up to her stomach and pressed her back into him. Hermione could definitely feel his passion pressing into her from behind; it made her head spin. This wasn't at all what she had imagined would happen. She had fully intended to end her life, that night; and then he had to go and do something like this. His tongue again darted out to taste her flesh once more.  
  
She blinked, "No..." and Hermione tried, weakly, to push away. Severus growled and pressed her roughly back into him. His hands capturing hers, holding her and he roughly whispered into her ear.  
  
"Don't you feel it!" he said, his breath hot on her skin.  
  
She was whimpering again, "..what..."  
  
"Life...life, Hermione!" he bit down on the soft lobe of her ear and she cried out. He soothed the hurt with his tongue, and continued softly. "Don't you feel alive? Here? Now?" His hands had brought hers up above her head, and he grazed the gentle curve of her breasts.  
  
She was feeling something all right... "...yes..." she said faintly. He ran his hands back down her arms and trailed them down over her breasts, feeling the hardened nipples under his palms. She squirmed beneath them.  
  
"Again," he said harshly. Hermione arched her back into those glorious hands.  
  
"Yes..." she said louder, quickly losing her self-control.  
  
His palms then closed around her breasts, softly kneading them. Her backside began rubbing rhythmically into his throbbing groin...he didn't know how much more he could take.  
  
"Again," he panted, giving her another squeeze.  
  
"YES!" she cried out and turned to him. He bent his head and roughly seized her lips with his. Her hands came up quickly to wrap around his neck and she immediately opened up to him, wanting his tongue in her mouth. He hungrily obliged and began exploring her lips, her tongue and teeth. She tasted unbelievable and he deepened the kiss, wrapping her arms around her back tightly. Hermione moaned against him and pressed harder into him, snaking one leg around his, furthering their closeness. He growled deeply and continued the kiss. They were furiously battling, each trying to gain the upper hand, which excited him. He had never felt this kind of passion for another woman in his entire life. She was burning him up from the inside out.  
  
His hands slid up her back, roaming everywhere. He couldn't feel her fast enough. And her little pink dress, while very appealing, was soon becoming a burden to him. Hermione's own hands had slithered their way up into his soft hair and was grasping. He loved the feel of her hands in his hair all of a sudden. Their mouths continued their desperate explorations, when her hands came down to the front of his robes, fumbling with the buttons. In her mind she couldn't help but complain, 'Of course today he would wear his black robes...ugh!' She groaned in frustration, and he smiled against her lips. He softly whispered something Hermione had never heard before...and suddenly his bare skin was connecting with her hands. She gasped, and removed her lips from his in shock and looked down. His shirt and robes were completely gone. Her eyes widened curiously and she blinked. He smiled coyly and began pushing against her.  
  
Later, while she lay panting beside him he gathered her in his arms, basking in the afterglow. His hands rubbed lazy patterns on her arms, and she nuzzled her face just under his chin; they both noticed how perfectly she fit against him, but neither said anything. She curled up into him, her hand lightly resting on his chest, and gave in to sleep, before she could think about anything else. He reached down and pulled a black satin sheet, up over them, and listened to the steady sound of her breathing. If he could have died, he would have actually have died a happy man at that moment. Her brown curls spilled out on the pillow behind her, and his lids drooped eventually after watching her sleep. He snuggled into her one last time, before himself giving in to his exhaustion, and slept with her in his arms that night.  
  
~*~*~*~* 


	12. Water plants

Disclaimer: Snape: "I love you." Hermione: "I know." Snape: *rolls eyes* JK: *smokes a fag*  
  
~Touchstone~  
Chapter Twelve  
  
By Gin  
  
A soft purr was heard in Snape's ear, and he rolled over; his arm automatically rising to drape over the body he knew to be there. However, it kept going lower and lower; until it hit the bed. No warm body under it. He laid, eyes closed, while his foggy mind tried to process why it was feeling so upset about this. His arm softly felt around, trying to feel the sleeping form, but again found nothing. Finally, this realisation hit him, and he calmly opened his eyes. There was a definite indentation in his neighbouring pillow, but the place where she lay was also quite cool.  
  
He blinked the sleep from his eyes, and sat up, momentarily disoriented and looked around. There was her cat. But she was nowhere to be found. So he gently folded back the covers, and slid out of bed looking for something to put on. There were his clothes; strewn haphazardly over the floor...hers were gone, except for her travelling cloak which was partially hidden behind a chair. He reached over to the small chair in front of the cold hearth, and slipped on the pair of rumpled sleeping bottoms, (leaving the cloak where it lay) and padded over plush, white carpet and cool stone into his living room. The sunlight made his eyes squint as he looked around...and still no Hermione.  
  
He walked over to the hall table near the door leading out of his quarters. 'Perhaps she left a note.' He thought. Once there, he looked down to find no such letter. He looked up at the door, confused.  
  
"Well..." His brows furrowed a moment, and he slowly turned around to walk back into his bedroom. He wondered why she didn't even leave a note. "Talk about ungrateful..." he murmured, slipping out of pyjama bottoms, and stepping into his bathroom.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Later at breakfast that morning, Severus beat Hermione to the Great Hall. He was already seated between Cerelia and an empty chair to Dumbledore's left, when she came in last. Snape remained completely impassive as she settled into her chair, directly not looking at him. Hermione grabbed a slice of toast and started adding strawberry jam to it and then just...sat there holding it. Snape calmly took a sip of his coffee, and then reached over for the sugar jar, purposefully brushing against her arm.  
  
"Oh, forgive me, Miss Granger," he said in a harsh undertone. The hairs on the back of her neck stood out on end, and she nodded jerkily. He glared at her for half a second before sprinkling a bit of not-really- wanted sugar in his coffee.  
  
Sprout was primly sitting next to Snape, buttering a croissant, and watching them with one eye, pretending to look at the Daily Prophet with the other. This was turning out to be an interesting morning so far....  
  
"Hermione? How are you my dear? Molly wrote me a letter telling me about yesterday evening. I know...it must have been very hard for you. However, you do look wonderful this morning, so I assume you had a pleasant night's rest?" Dumbledore began opening a lemon drop and smiled kindly at her. Hermione about dropped her knife and Snape sat still, with a slight smirk on his face.  
  
"Oh, I'm sure she did, Headmaster. I saw to that..." he added quietly. Albus nodded, thankfully, and patted Hermione's hand before continuing his conversation with Minerva. Hermione continued to sit, rigid as stone, and she half turned to glare back at Snape, throwing him a "watch it..." look in his direction. He narrowed his eyes slightly and went back to his breakfast.  
  
Later that afternoon, Hermione sat down and wrote a letter to Molly and Ginny, thanking them for the wonderful stay and how sorry she was to have left the way she did. They had already sent her things back to the castle including Crookshanks, and Molly had packed a picnic basket full of meat pies and chocolates. She promised she would return and she'd get started immediately on Harry's cure, and not to give up. She sighed as Crookshanks purred and began pawing at the door. Hermione stood and walked over to the entryway to let him out and he immediately bounded away down the corridor, and flipped around to bat at a pebble on the ground before resuming his trip down the hall. She smiled at his energy, she felt as if she had none. And she was a little sore- but best not to think about that for the moment.  
  
She decided she should occupy her mind with something else, so she turned back into her rooms to grab her notes and more parchment and went off to the library for more research.  
  
Five hours later, she sat mentally exhausted, amid precarious towers of books, crumples of parchment, ink-stained fingers and hair a frizz. However, she might have stumbled onto something. Despite her aching back from leaning over reading, she perked up and continued with these last bits of note. It was a type of aquatic weed, and its uses fit perfectly for her latest theory. Hermione now thought she had enough information for a trial run, but the article stated that the Bogbean weed must be freshly picked, and almost immediately soaked.  
  
A small surge of energy re-asserted itself inside her, and she grabbed up the description of the plant and immediately headed for Professor Sprout's greenhouses.  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry dear, we just ran out this last term," Cerelia set down a pot beside some quivering plants and looked apologetically at Hermione. Her shoulders slumped.  
  
"Well, do you know where I can at least find some? Or if it's sold nearby?" she asked hopefully.  
  
The older witch was grabbing for some pruning sheers and looked up thoughtfully, thinking. "You know, I used to grow the Moonflower, that's another name for it dear, in a little pond I used to have out back. But the children kept getting into it, and some of my plants would grab them, well, needless to say I don't have the pond anymore." Hermione's face fell, but the Herbology witch went on. "But, there is a trail that leads near the Forbidden Forest, and winds back into a much nicer wooded area. It's just on the outskirts of Hogwarts' grounds, near a Muggle village actually. And there is a rather large lake there. I know Severus goes out there from time to time, and finds the most wondrous plants for me. I believe he harvests Bogbean, and if my memory serves correct it might still be available to pick. Though, I have no idea of exactly where it is, but I can give you a rough idea. Severus has said you take that trail and it will wind about, but lead you to the lake. And somewhere near there, there is a clearing that leads to some shallows and I think he picks it there. I remember this because he got lost once, and came back with all these scratches and gashes," the little witch giggled. "It's so funny to watch Poppy clean him up, he complains worse than a child." Both women laughed.  
  
Hermione thanked her, and borrowed a basket to collect the Moonflower with and set off before it got too late. Ceri watched her leave for a moment before going back to work.  
  
Hermione set off in a brisk walk. The fresh would do her some good, and a walk might be just the thing she needed. Sure enough she found the trail, though she hadn't really noticed it when she was actually in school. Odd, she thought. If she, Harry and Ron had known about it when they were students, she wondered if they would have taken it to see where it had led to. It was also strange that there should be a Muggle village near so much magic. But she remembered someone once telling her if any Muggle was to see Hogwarts it would just appear as some rubble from a once majestic castle.  
  
"Makes sense," she thought aloud and continued on through the scenic trail.  
  
Not twenty minutes after Hermione had left; Severus came trailing down to Sprout's little area of Hogwarts. She was fussing with a particularly irritable Mandrake seedling when he knocked on her doorway.  
  
"Hello! Yes, come on in then, Severus," the dirty little witch again looked up from her work and smiled at Severus. He bowed his head in greeting and smirked.  
  
"Cerelia," he eyed the wiggling plant beside her. "I was just on my way to Diagon Alley to pick up more supplies and thought I would offer to pick something up for you?" He kicked away a slithering vine near his foot and calmly waited for her reply.  
  
She screwed up her eyes in thought. "Yes actually. I need more murtlap seeds. I've completely exhausted my supply, and that's all I need as of now. I'll be working with some Venomous Tentacula next month, and I like to have the murtlap fully gown by then if you know what I mean."  
  
"Yes. Well then, if you're sure there is nothing else," he nodded politely and made to leave when she spoke up suddenly.  
  
"OH! Hermione was just asking about some Bogbean, which reminds me, I need some as well. I'm not sure how much she plans to harvest, or how much will be left, so if you could just grab a few bundles for me that would be excellent."  
  
Snape had half turned to look at her after she said this and his curiosity got the better of him.  
  
"...Why was Miss Granger asking about that?"  
  
Cerelia went back to her Mandrake potting, "She needed some for some experiment. I do believe she's intending to use it to try to find a cure for Mr. Potter. Rather a different approach really, I would have never thought of using it. So I told her where you usually gather some, and that I hadn't asked you in awhile and didn't know how good the plants would be for sure."  
  
The fussy Mandrake threw some dirt out of his pot and Professor Sprout rolled her eyes at it and covered it up with more mulch.  
  
Snape watched her for a moment. "Oh," and he started to leave again, but then calmly turned back around.  
  
"But, she hasn't gone to get some now has she?"  
  
Cerelia looked up and dusted off her hands and replied, "I think that was her intention." Severus sighed and shook his head.  
  
"That's not good. This is Clabber breeding season and they're particularly violent at their heightened state. There's a large pack that lives near that area...." Sprout's face became worried.  
  
"Oh dear...I hadn't realised. I saw her heading that direction when she left...should I send for Hagrid?"  
  
"No, he's not in his hut." At her questioning look he explained. "He asked me to check on something about badgers at the Magical Menagerie while I was in Diagon Alley today, but I've forgotten what it was and when I stopped by he wasn't at home."  
  
"Badgers?!" Sprout looked positively gleeful and Snape shook his head and turned towards the door.  
  
"I suppose I will go and check on her," he called. Cerelia just smiled and went back to her pruning.  
  
As he strode down the lawn towards the familiar path, he pocketed his orders and hurried along. It really was a beautiful day. The forest was calm, the wind was just so, it wasn't brutally hot...it smelled nice...Hermione smells nice....  
  
~*~*~*  
  
It really is a beautiful day, thought Hermione, as she wound her way along the little dirt path. She had stopped to admire some really beautiful flowers and even picked some before continuing. At last she reached what appeared to be a clearing on the right side of the path and turned off it and picked her way through the brush towards the muddy shore and sat her basket down. It was breathtaking. The mountains surrounding Hogwarts loomed overhead and were reflected in the calm surface of the lake. She inhaled and closed her eyes. The distant sounds of birds chirping mixed with the gently sounds of the water lapping against the shore calmed her even more. She would have to remember this place most definitely.  
  
She walked over to the edge of the water to peer out, and could definitely see the bottom for quite a ways out, so surely these were the shallow's Cerelia had mentioned. She turned around and lay her basket down and took off the outer layer of her robes and laid them carefully in the grass. She half turned and looked back at the water wondering how deep she would have to wade in, and supposed she could just Transfigure her clothes into a swimsuit. The birds continued to chirp merrily and a fish shattered the glass-like surface of the calm lake.  
  
Or...she could just go nude. Hermione looked down and grinned devilishly. She was in the middle of nowhere after all...people really weren't around. And she had never gone swimming nude, though she had always wanted to. And the sun was shining, the scent of the woods and trees and the water made her giddy and she just didn't care. How could she get caught!? Why not? So, she timidly shrugged out of her clothes and laid them in a pile next to her robes and straightened up. She cautiously looked around, still fighting her sense of paranoia, but shrugged and determinedly made her way to the water's edge; delighting in the feel of rich mud squishing between her toes. She laughed to herself and continued on in. She felt around cautiously for sharp rocks and debris and luckily found none. The water felt so pleasant around her, and was just the right temperature too, and when she got to waist high water she stretched languidly- the tips of her hair grazing the water. Again she smiled and laughed aloud at the tingling feeling of the hot sun kissing her bared breasts. This was absolutely divine!! Why hadn't she done this before, she wondered.  
  
Despite the fact that he completely felt like a voyeur, he licked his lips- 'Yes, those were particularly nice...' he remembered. Snape had happened upon Hermione as she was laying her robes on the grass. And then she was taking off her clothes...and of course it was only the gentlemanly thing to do to not interrupt someone in a...private moment...also it would cause them discomfort.... No, he would patiently wait until the naked vixen before him put her clothes back on. The scratching of the rough bark of the tree he was hiding behind on his cheek brought him back to his senses. And unfortunately that all too familiar tingling in his groin proved annoying, but he ignored it- she was wetting her hair. And at the moment he found that quite fascinating.  
  
After stretching again she swam out a little further; Severus thought she swam rather gracefully...especially nude. When she stopped about twenty feet out, she took a massive gulp of air and quickly disappeared under the rippling waves. Severus unconsciously groaned and leaned his side against the tree, folding his arms, watching, and waiting.  
  
'God, she's great to look at,' He thought. 'The damn wench,' he growled at no one in particular. As he watched the occasional ripple from her under the water he remembered his reasoning for coming out here in the first place. And sure enough when he poked his head out of his hiding place he spied a few of the curious Clabbers sniffing around Hermione's discarded clothes. They really were repulsive creatures, he thought. They had mottled green skin and resembled both a frog and a monkey. Did they honestly have a purpose in this world? It was at this time that one of the Clabber's noticed Severus' presence and the bright red pustule in the middle of its forehead flashed alerting its fellows. Severus casually zapped a few sparks in their direction, grinning as they hissed and scampered off. His duty fulfilled, he turned back to the lake.  
  
He had honestly thought she'd gone out a bit further than she should have. Then he wondered if she'd remembered to use some sort of breathing charm. Surely she would have if she'd been under this long. He shifted around; it didn't take this long to gather a few reeds and she should be coming up for air by now.  
  
He hissed and stepped out from the shelter of the trees and walked over to the water's edge. He tapped his foot annoyed, and craned his neck to attempt to look out further and saw a few bubbles break the surface. He carefully set himself in his imposing stance and crossed arms, ready to give her a disapproving glare. He was so evil and barely suppressed a conceited smirk.  
  
Her head broke through the surface and she gasped for air. She appeared to be struggling to keep her head above the water and kept bobbing up and down without the use of her arms. Severus cleared his throat and tried to look as menacing as he could.  
  
"Are you in need of assistance?" he asked superciliously. She gasped in surprise and simultaneously swallowed some lake water. She choked and clumsily poked her head back above the surface. He grinned maliciously.  
  
"What are you doing here?!" she croaked, still coughing.  
  
"Cerelia told me you had foolishly gone out here alone to gather Moonflower. Apparently you had no idea of the dangerous animals in this area or you'd have taken a companion with you." Hermione blinked; what dangerous animals?  
  
"She said this area was much friendlier than the Forbidden Forest. Exactly what kind of animal are you talking about?" She sank slightly further into the water, uncomfortably aware of just how naked she was below the surface. Perfect.  
  
He paused for just a moment, "Never mind that, just hurry and gather those reeds up and get out of there, I'm sure you have enough, and I have more important things to be doing with my time." She blinked again.  
  
"Excuse me," she spit out more lake water, "but I do not remember asking you to protect me from the terrible creatures of the forest, Snape. I am a grown woman and can take care of myself, thank you." She barely suppressed a giggle as a fish swam by and tickled the bottom of her foot and Severus rolled his eyes. She held her head up...or as high as she could while staying buoyant.  
  
"Of course, how could I forget; although it is quite easy to do so around you." She glared at him and he glared right back.  
  
"I'm fine thank you. You can leave. I'll just be a moment more," she insisted. He wasn't going to get a peep show.  
  
"Miss Granger, I did not come out here to waste my time. I fully intend to see you safely back to the castle, now hurry up. I would like to be in Diagon Alley before the sun sets." He smirked at her.  
  
Hermione thought quickly. "Well," she began. "Maybe I'd like to swim a bit longer." She mentally smacked her forehead. Honestly, Hermione...  
  
"Indeed..." He sighed. "Miss Granger, I grow tired of these childish games," he warned, though secretly delighted. She was outright fidgeting. "And I hope if you were planning on swimming you would do it at a later time, as those leaves need to be soaked in a Guar solution as quickly as possible once they are harvested."  
  
She swallowed; there was no winning today. Just submit and get the hell out of here Hermione, she thought dejectedly.  
  
"Oh fine!" She got a firmer hold on her bundle of Bogbean weed and looked back up to him.  
  
"Well?" he said impatiently.  
  
"Oh...turn around!" she yelled. He cocked an eyebrow.  
  
"Really Miss Granger...we are adults, and it's not as if-"  
  
"I said turn around!" her cheeks were flushed.  
  
"Miss Granger, I don't see the problem if you are adequately attired-"  
  
"Well maybe I'm not, just bloody turn around!" she yelled again. Pride simply would not allow her to plainly say she was swimming mother-naked, in a lake in the middle of nowhere.  
  
He raised his eyebrows in mock-astonishment and revelled in her embarrassed expression, but stood firm.  
  
Hermione glared at him when he didn't turn around. He gave her a last, short questioning glance, then smirked while shaking his head, and calmly turned around so she could get out of the lake "unseen". He heard the sounds of the water splashing and gurgling as she tried to get out and dressed as quickly as possible. His lips twitched at the frustrated little grunts she made as she tried to pull her clothes on over her wet skin hurriedly.  
  
"I'm sure those would slip on better if you were dry...." he added monotonously. The rustling sound stopped, followed by a very quiet incantation, and quickly followed again by the sounds of clothes returning back to their place on her body. When he turned back around, her cheeks were pink and her hair still dripping.  
  
"Forget something," he added noticing the water droplets glinting in her hair. She stiffened, glaring at him yet again.  
  
"Maybe I want it wet." At this she grabbed up her basket now filled with sopping weeds, and stomped off away from the lake, and the thicket of trees; but most of all from him. He sighed, and with glittering eyes followed after her; dodging the violently flipping branches she purposefully flicked in his direction.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Much later that evening, Hermione found herself preparing the Guam tincture in the Hospital wing, drinking tea with Poppy and Minerva. Her former Head of House had been inquiring after the Weasley's, whom she was still all very fond of. Hermione noticed she hadn't asked about Harry, but said nothing. Which was just as well. She wasn't exactly keen on revisiting that particular memory just yet.  
  
So there she was, re-soaking, cracking, and stripping the long, fleshy stems. She deposited the white and pink fuzzy flower parts to the side, wondering if she could use them later. A tiny surge of energy sparked within her. Small step though it might be, she was physically headed in the direction of finding a cure for Harry. Her latest theory proved to be very promising, and she had shared it with the two women present. Using the Bogbean, she could possibly stimulate Harry's internal system, then combine an energizing excitant, possibly a Guarana extract, hopefully she could get Harry to respond. If he had just enough energy to produce a normal response they could use other medicinal means through St. Mungo's to keep him stable. Minerva, not really having much knowledge about Potions, or antidotes, stood there listening intently and offered to help, while Poppy had bustled about finding whatever ingredients Hermione might need for the future.  
  
"I don't have everything, dear, but I'm sure Severus can supply you with what I'm lacking," the little witch replied, brushing off her hands on her once pristine, white apron.  
  
Hermione nodded without looking up, and continued stripping the last stalk, careful not to waste any of the juices near the roots. Poppy quickly glanced at Minerva, before re-adjusting a jar on her counter needlessly.  
  
"Speaking of...where is our Potions master today? I haven't seen him about."  
  
Neither of the older women spoke. Cerelia had told them about Severus' curiosity of Hermione's whereabouts earlier, and they waited for Hermione to answer; ready to trap and pester her when she told them. Hermione carefully dropped the last, peeled stalk into the Guar solution Poppy had made and feigned cleaning up. She knew exactly where they were heading with this topic, and wasn't about to give in. Besides, it wasn't like she had made it a point to know where he was anyways. He told her. After he saw her naked in the water earlier...she blushed and looked away. She just knew he had seen her naked in the water.  
  
"I haven't the slightest." Hermione quickly cast a temporary heating Charm on the mixture of plants and alcohol solution. "I think I'll leave these to soak for a few hours before I attempt to purify the infusion. Afternoon ladies," and she curtly nodded before hastily exiting the ward. Minerva snapped her fingers, and Poppy stomped her foot.  
  
"Tsk. You wait, Poppy. I'll catch them. Whether they like it or not." Poppy chuckled. "It really just isn't fair that they keep all this from us." Minerva picked at imaginary lint, grinning. Poppy just shook her head and set the bowl of soaking Bogbean leaves further back on the counter.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Nightfall found Hermione hard at work, poring over parchments and books, potions and pestles. She had finally tied her messy hair back, after blowing it out of her face at least a dozen times, and stuck a quill in to secure it, and was now chewing the side of her thumb, brows creased in concentration. There was something she was missing, she was sure. She hissed in frustration, and threw down her notes. Her eyes stung. She'd been in this room for at least five hours now, working non-stop. Luckily Poppy had let her use the small laboratory in her office so Hermione wouldn't have to enlarge her rooms to make her own lab. She could of course always go down into the dungeons and borrow one of Severus', but that would mean speaking to him. She wasn't quite ready to do that just yet.  
  
When she'd woken up that morning beside him, she's almost panicked. She still couldn't believe what had happened. Pity sex. She sighed. That's all it was. It was great, yes.... actually, really great. But he hadn't meant what he'd said. Who would in the face of a raving lunatic? Come on, she had thought. She had been so angry at herself, even at him. So when she'd woken up, lulled into a false sense of contentment, she remembered how they had gotten there in the first place. She had smiled in the beginning, thinking he had been trying to help. Free her. But the more she began thinking...the more it just didn't add up. He'd been with her while she had been crying; he knew she had been weak. Hell, she had been talking about her own death! Who wouldn't take pity on someone that pathetic...even if it was sex?  
  
Her eyes now stung with something other than fatigue, and she growled and went back to her writings.  
  
Her cauldron was still simmering, when Snape emerged from the hallway and into Madam Pomfrey's office, still in his travelling cloak. He was going to drop off Poppy's monthly supplies, but found her working in there instead. He watched her as she had looked up and stared into space, before determinedly going back to work. He glanced around her. Her work area was a disaster; how on earth could someone work like that? He shook his head and proceeded to Pomfrey's little storeroom.  
  
"You do realise it's dangerous to work with Potions in a cluttered area. I hope you're not making any kind of medicinal mixtures." He enlarged the medi-witch's packages and closed the door behind him. She stood with her hands on her hips...the famous glare in place.  
  
"I'm accustomed to my workspaces, thank you, and as previously stated, I believe I can handle myself. Did you have a purpose? Or are you here to bother me," she snapped, and turned back to her work.  
  
"Temper, temper," he said smoothly. Curiosity again winning over, he approached her desk and peered at her notes, and in the cauldron.  
  
He inhaled slightly, and looked up, as if thinking. "Is that a variation of a Infensus Draught?" She nodded stiffly and continued to pretend to otherwise ignore him.  
  
He gave her an appraising look. "You're missing Ginseng," and he turned to leave. Hermione stopped dead. That's what she had been missing...but-  
  
"Isn't that...more of a Muggle drug?"  
  
Snape slowed, and half turned towards her. "Technically. But they haven't quite figured out its proper usage, which is why it never works," he smirked. "Simpletons. They do that to a lot of helpful medicines. Laziness, really." Hermione mentally slapped her forehead for the second time that day. She now remembered him once lecturing them on common Muggle remedies, and why they didn't work, back in her seventh year.  
  
"I remember now...thanks." He shrugged, and continued to watch her. She turned back to her cutting board and looked around for some Ginseng extract.  
  
"She doesn't have any, and she didn't request it, so I didn't buy her some. However, I do," he paused, waiting for her reaction, and delighted in her torn expression.  
  
She broke. "May I use some." It was really more of a statement.  
  
He folded his arms, and cocked his head. "That wasn't exactly courteous. And I'm almost out anyways, now that I think of it-"  
  
She sighed, "Please?" He twitched his lips.  
  
"Just a moment," and he swept away, returning about ten minutes later.  
  
"It took you long enough," she murmured when he returned, and then bit her lip when he produced bottles with more than just Ginseng extracts.  
  
He frowned, "I was searching for other ingredients you might need if you are attempting the particular Potion I was thinking," he bit out. "Some people are truly ungrateful."  
  
She didn't reply. It had been rude of her...he was doing her a favour. Or was he also using that last statement as a double meaning....  
  
She reached for the bottle wondering how much she should add, and then scanned the page of the book she had been looking at.  
  
"Try four millilitres," he suggested and studied his long fingers. She closed her eyes in frustration, but obediently measured out four millilitres. She then examined each of the extra bottles he'd brought.  
  
"I wouldn't trust her grated heartstring...it might be a touch too old," he explained when she picked up his last jar.  
  
"Thank you," she said quietly again. All right, the man was fairly genius if he knew this ingredients list by heart, she thought. Or very lucky, as this was still a debatable concoction. She chewed her lip thoughtfully, and went back to her own list. Next she was to stir seven times clockwise, then add Essence of Wormwood, wait seven seconds, and then added in the Guarana extract to reverse the sleeping effect in the drinker. Snape watched her carefully, silently approving the exactness of her movements. She always had done well in Potions.  
  
When the liquid turned a livid green, she removed the flame, and set the cauldron aside, sealing it. Tomorrow she would add in the last steps required, and hopefully be able to test it on Harry. She reached up and rubbed her neck.  
  
"How are you able to hold that...bending position over the cauldrons for so long?"  
  
"Practice, I suppose." He watched her silently for a few moments. "I have an excellent muscle relaxing ointment back in my office. If you're interested, I could let you borrow some." He really didn't know why he was being nice to her. Her very presence was agitating. And yet....  
  
She nodded, and then began to quickly clean up. A few flicks of her wand and she was done. She turned towards him, not exactly expectant, but not foreboding either. He stood up and exited the workroom, followed by Hermione. They turned to walk down the corridor in silence and down the staircases that led to his dark offices.  
  
"Wait here," he spoke quietly and exited through a door on his right, once in his office. She again looked around at the curious objects floating in jars, half of which still didn't look real. He returned in a few minutes with a small jar in hand and presented it to her.  
  
"It doesn't have to be washed off, you can just work it into the skin near the affected muscles and it should start to work next to instantly."  
  
Hermione unscrewed the top and raised the jar to her nose. "Roses?" she looked up surprised.  
  
"Yes. Well, Minerva was tired of my customary Sandalwood and even Peppermint gets old." Hermione grinned slightly and looked around again. She could feel the tension in the air around them and spoke the first thing she could think of.  
  
"I've always wondered; you don't actually use any of the specimens in these jars do you?" Snape looked around appreciatively at his gruesome collection.  
  
"Of course. You have no idea how rare these objects are in my field of work." He said no more for a moment, then looked sideways at her.  
  
She caught it and shook her head. "You should just throw them out and get more convincing samples if you just want to scare them. These look like something out of a bad Muggle science fiction film."  
  
"You've seen those too?" he said mock-surprised.  
  
"Two jokes in the space of one minute; impressive."  
  
"Always," he sighed. She shook her head again and turned to leave.  
  
"You're welcome, by the way," he said dryly.  
  
She stopped at the doorway and slowly turned around to face him.  
  
"For?" she said quietly.  
  
He watched her for a moment before answering. "Whatever you want."  
  
She stood silently for a moment before nodding and slowly making her way back to Gryffindor Tower. He walked out of his office a few minutes later and locked it, turning around to see if she had gone before purposefully banging his head against the solid oak door, and trudging back to his empty, quiet rooms. As she ascended the main staircase she fingered the little jar of ointment and whispered a sad thank you. ~*~*~*~*  
  
~*~*~*~* A/N: *is now dead from many readers' spearing me from lack of ATTENTION!!!! * I know. Anyways, it's not as long, but I worked on the next chapter to come...so we'll see what happens. And to those who were wondering, no, it's only about halfway finished. To sum up: Hate me, because I do. And I'm sorry. ( p.s. a little over a year ago I started this little project!! omgiknow! 


	13. A Bit of Lemonade

Disclaimer:  
  
Hermione: "Are you sure you'll be okay without me?"  
  
Snape: snort "Yes."  
  
Hermione: arches an eyebrow like all the other good fics have her do leaves  
  
Snape: waits...gets up....goes outside...  
  
Snape: frolicsinthegrassss!!!  
  
Touchstone  
  
Chapter Thirteen  
  
By Gin  
  
Tiny glass cylinders fumed peacefully beside Hermione in a rack while she searched around for cork stoppers. The first batch was finally finished. She let them cool before sealing them, and gathered up a cloth to wrap them in for travel. She didn't expect immediate results as the dosages she would be giving him were extreme and little by little dosages would be needed for healthy results. That is, if it worked, and only then if it didn't kill him first. There was that risk for an experimental potion usage; however, they had no other alternative. Hermione exhaled and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear then bundled up the miniature bottles of optimism. Dumbledore and McGonagall had met her in Madam Pomfrey's office to give her encouragement. Snape had also come along as he'd been helping her the past few days with the concoction and had agreed to go with Hermione to help administer the potion to Harry. He was also bringing along some counter- affecting potions to try and reverse the effects should something go wrong. However, he'd told Hermione he doubted there would be much he could do if the Gryffindor reacted badly to it.  
  
"Good luck, my dear." Dumbledore put his hand on Hermione's shoulder for encouragement. Minerva was standing crisply next to him and nodded to her as well, while Poppy began storing the left over phials in a large wooden cabinet.  
  
Hermione voiced her thank yous and together she and Severus left the Hospital Wing to make their way down to the great front doors of the castle. Severus didn't say much to her during their walk to the gates; it was an all around awkward situation. What if the boy died during the administration? What if they'd made a mistake? What if nothing happened? He felt confident in almost everything he did, but in the tiniest recesses of his mind he always held some reserves. He always had. And to top it all off, the last time he and Hermione had been there...well, he knew what had happened afterwards. Nevertheless he kept his game face on—blank stare with a slight frown and stiff upper lip.  
  
Hermione, too, was quiet. She'd been preparing herself to not break down again and to remain hopeful. She couldn't do anything productive if her mind was tormented. When they reached the gate, Severus' hand momentarily twitched towards hers but was immediately stilled when they faced each other.  
  
"Well then, see you on the other side."  
  
Snape nodded and half an instant later they were standing, yet again, outside the entrance to St. Mungo's looking in.  
  
Once they'd registered with the medi-witch at the front desk they made the same all-to-familiar journey up to Harry's room. Hermione clenched her fists in an effort to wring the nervousness from her soul while they walked in silence. Once they'd reached the entrance of the dull grey door that led to Harry's room, Hermione inhaled and turned to look at her companion.  
  
"Now or never. Right?" Snape noticed the unconsciously asked permission and simply nodded. They opened the door, to find Ginny sitting quietly beside Harry.  
  
She immediately stood up and looked back and forth between Hermione and her former Potions professor—rather like a guilty schoolgirl. Ginny stumbled trying to find the right words to say.  
  
"Hermione, Professor Snape, um, hello." Ginny tried to feign a slight grin and began smoothing her rumpled jeans with her hands. She looked tired, but her spirits seemed to have improved since Hermione had last left her with the Weasley's at the Burrow.  
  
Hermione, not realising they would have company during the trial, stopped short of the door before awkwardly stepping in. Severus stood just as rigid as always behind her and examined the monotonous walls.  
  
"Ginny? I'm sorry, I didn't know you were going to be here..." she faded off. What else would she have said? 'During the experiment?' She then walked fully into the room to stand beside the bed and looked at her friend curiously.  
  
Ginny spoke before Hermione could, "I know what you're thinking, and the answer is no. I honestly just got here." Hermione continued to gage her friend reluctantly. "I swear. I've been home...ask Mum." Ginny continued to fidget with her clothes and sat back down on the chair beside Harry's bed.  
  
Hermione didn't know what to say. "Ginny, I know you want to be here for him, but, well...this is, well—"she couldn't bring herself to say, let alone admit what she was trying not to think. Luckily she didn't have to.  
  
"Miss Weasley, what Miss Granger is trying to say, is that being as you are very close to Mr. Potter it is unadvisable for you to be here at the moment. As much as I regret to inform you, this potion is highly unstable and not medically approved as yet, thus the effects resulting after we have administered the potion could be drastic if not tragic." His "professor voice" had taken over the uneasiness, leaving the implications quite clear for Ginny to understand should she have any hopes.  
  
Ginny blinked and focused her attention to the dark figure now beside Hermione. "Yes, Professor. Hermione made that clear when she wrote us the other day. But, I still wanted to be here." She cast her gaze down. Severus stared hard at her for a moment more before turning his gaze back to Hermione and nodded. Ginny was obviously willing to suffer, so be it.  
  
Hermione still felt unsure about letting Ginny watch, but was in no mood for an argument at the moment. She removed the bundle of cloth from inside her robes and unfolded it on a nearby table as carefully as she could. Snape likewise spelled his supposed antidotes back to regular size and laid them on another table from the corner and positioned it nearby. After checking to see that the tonics were all the correct temperature (due to some nicely performed Heating Charms by Poppy), he turned towards Hermione indicating he was ready whenever she was. Hermione straightened beside him and inhaled.  
  
She brushed a hand on Harry's cheek and looked into his pale, lifeless eyes.  
  
"I hope this works, Harry, please forgive me if otherwise?" she said under her breath. Ginny scooted forward in her chair to the edge and grasped his hands once before letting go and biting her lip, blinking back the threatening tears.  
  
Hermione lifted Harry's head slightly and opened his slacked jaw. Then she reached behind her and carefully picked up a warmed phial from the table and removed the stop. Snape picked up Harry's wrist, placing his slightly cold fingers on the veins, and nodded for Hermione to continue. She inhaled again and bent over to his lips and with one hand slowly poured the vicious liquid down his throat, while the other methodically massaged his neck muscles into the swallowing reflex. When the phial was drained, Hermione and Ginny held their breath while Snape began counting Harry's pulse and checking for any apparent differences in his face. The soft whirrs and tinks of tiny bells continued their rhythmic patterns around them but didn't change pace or tone. Harry's eyes continued to stare dully into nothing, his pupils hadn't changed size, skin colour was still pallid and clammy, pulse weak but also unchanged. Hermione exhaled and stood up looking down on him; nothing was happening.  
  
Ginny's intent stare left Harry and focused instead on Hermione. "Is...?" she began, looking back at him again, her brows knit.  
  
Hermione frowned in confusion and looked at the phials on the table, and over to Snape. His eyes were concentrating on Harry and his fingers still gripping his wrist. But after another minute he released Harry's arm, straightened and looked apologetically to Ginny before sparing Hermione a slight glance. He exhaled calmly and began Shrinking his antidotes and pocketing them.  
  
Hermione looked back at Harry. "Well? What, there was no change at all?" she asked to Severus.  
  
He turned to her shaking his head giving her a slightly sympathetic look. She sighed and raked her fingers through her hair, disbelieving. Ginny sat back in her chair and blinked away another tear.  
  
"Maybe next time?" Ginny asked rhetorically. Hermione looked back down at the creature claiming Harry's persona and frowned.  
  
"Well that was a complete waste." Hermione kicked angrily at the gravel as she and Severus walked up the pathway to the castle.  
  
"No need for histrionics; we did the best we could do. We shall just try again." Snape was walking, hands in the pockets of his black slacks, beside her. "It may just need to be stronger."  
  
"But you said if it were any stronger it could kill him," she argued.  
  
"Yes, however that was before we knew this particular strength was ineffective."  
  
She sighed and crossed her arms as well. The hot sun was blaring down on them and only added to her frustration. Snape reached up to wipe a bead of sweat from his brow and looked up to the sky. Not a cloud to be seen. They kept walking and Hermione tossed more ideas to him about different ways to alter the potion. Snape was listening to her, but just barely. He was more interested in the huge hawk that was circling the skies above the castle just ahead. He nodded and mumbled a few sounds at her comments before the bird swooped down towards an area that looked to be relatively close to Dumbledore's office. Hermione followed his gaze and watched as the bird hovered by a turret in mid-air before flying into the apparently opened window.  
  
When they arrived at Snape's office in the much cooler dungeons, Albus was comfortably waiting inside as a large, stately Peregrine falcon waited patiently, head held high, on his desk. It straightened when Severus walked in; Albus simply smiled.  
  
"Ah, my little alchemists have arrived; unfortunately they seem to be here much earlier than I would have hoped." His voice sounded as if it were in a pleasantly strained tone. Under the false cheer lurked the obvious disappointment.  
  
"Indeed," replied Severus regarding the bird standing in the centre of the desk.  
  
"Yes, well, in due time I'm sure. However, at the present moment you have a visitor," Dumbledore said indicating the bird.  
  
Snape inclined his head and calmly walked over to the proud creature. The falcon seemed to size Severus up and clicked its sharp beak impatiently while scratching at his paper-strewn desktop. Snape frowned and snatched the scroll harshly from its grasp. Hermione looked at the bird curiously then to Dumbledore who seemed to be on the edge of his seat.  
  
Snape calmly untied the deep blue satin ribbon holding the scroll together and let it fall to the floor before unrolling it. His face was completely unreadable at first, but then an arched eyebrow followed, which was finished up nicely with an intense frown. He crumpled up the parchment with an angry sigh and tossed the letter into the rubbish bin. To complete the entire ordeal, he folded his arms like an upset child and stared straight ahead.  
  
Dumbledore broke the silence with, "Well for God's sake man, what did she say?"  
  
This time the sigh was frustrated. "Nothing sincere I'm sure. No doubt Launce had to completely twist her arm to get her to even acknowledge my presence." Dumbledore raised his eyebrows, and Accio'd the crumpled letter into his wrinkled hands and opened it up. Snape gawked at him.  
  
"I'm fairly certain that's illegal," his frown deepened.  
  
Dumbledore squinted at the writing and said faintly, "Well then come take it from me," and continued to read without looking up. Snape grumbled something rude and went to sit behind his desk contemplating whether or not to knock the pompous Peregrine off. It preened its glossy black feathers while waiting for the disrespectful humans to send a reply.  
  
Meanwhile, Hermione had been standing silently to the side, curiosity eating away at her before she quietly walked up behind Albus to read over his shoulder. Severus noted it and irritably explained.  
  
"It's just a formal invitation to Mother's birthday celebration." Though it was clipped, she could definitely sense some emotion behind the words.  
  
"Really? But that's wonderful isn't it?" she said.  
  
Dumbledore piped up, "Oh, it's from Lavinia I see! When was the last time she wrote you, it's been quite awhile hasn't it? It says your mother's birthday celebration is this weekend...rather short notice, but lovely just the same." Dumbledore finished the letter and looked up at Severus with beaming blue eyes. He was very happy for him and knew what this secretly meant to Severus.  
  
"To answer your question, yes it has been. So many years in fact that I can't remember."  
  
"But you'll go won't you?" Dumbledore was now sipping a steaming cup of tea and waiting expectantly for him to say 'yes.' Snape looked at him doubtfully and looked back at the bird.  
  
"As fake as the sentiments to include me in the family affairs are, I will have to respectfully decline." The falcon looked at Severus as if it were the only answer he would have accepted anyway. Snape glared at him.  
  
Hermione argued, "But Severus, you have to go. Remember Launce was very excited to have you come, and he came all this way to see you. They are making an effort, so you should as well." She glared right back at his answering scowl.  
  
"Hermione, Lavinia wouldn't honestly have me come, nor might I add would my mother, had Launce not pestered her. And I'm sure a few whining declarations from the child sealed it if only to shut her up. I'll send a card; I'm not up for histrionics at the moment." The bird clicked indignantly and Severus flicked it on the beak. It screeched and flew around the room, showering them in feathers.  
  
"Severus," Hermione berated. He shrugged.  
  
Dumbledore reached his arm up, which the bird gratefully accepted, and stroked its feathered head. "Why don't you go, my boy. Take the plunge, you are family after all." Snape snickered. "It's true. People dwell far too much on such ignorant goings-on from the past. It's ridiculous and I for one think its high time your entire family moved on." Snape rolled his eyes. Hermione glared at him, still unclear as to what they were talking about.  
  
"Albus, I really don't think it's a good idea, as it is my family," he almost stuttered on the word family, "and my decision. And I am deciding not to go."  
  
Ten minutes later, Severus was writing a terse response that he would be in attendance but that he could not stay for long as he had "important matters to attend to and cannot be bothered with trivialities. Severus signed his name with a slight growl, rolled up the parchment and held it out for the black bird to take. It happened to nick his thumb and Snape just restrained himself from harming the creature. He didn't think Lavinia would forgive him, again, for killing her personal falcon.  
  
Albus slipped the animal a treat and replied, "Well, I'm glad you saw reason. I'm quite sure you will have a wonderful time." He then smiled at Severus, winked at Hermione, and departed with a little bounce in his step. On his way out he called, "Oh! Be a good lad and tell Moira, Happy Birthday for me! And tell Launce and Lavinia to bring the children for a visit!"  
  
Snape led the offensive fowl to his window and watched it fly off into the glaring heat of the afternoon. "I hope you burn," he said quietly.  
  
"What was that?" Hermione asked coming up behind him.  
  
"Nothing."  
  
She stood there, slightly smirking, looking out at the bird.  
  
"It was ultimately my decision," he said poutily. She pursed her lips in an effort not to full out smile and nodded saying innocently, "Of course it was."  
  
Much later in the afternoon, McGonagall sat in a white lawn chair sipping a cold glass of lemonade with the other female faculty members, and Hermione, who were still at Hogwarts for the summer. The garden was abuzz with bees and butterflies and the flowers were in full bloom. The smell of honeysuckle permeated the hot air. Poppy spelled up a large umbrella to shield her pale face from the sun.  
  
"I thought you were getting a little pink in the cheeks," replied Madam Hooch upon observation.  
  
"I told her she should have brought a hat," said McGonagall taking another sip of lemonade.  
  
"It is a lovely day, if only the sun would let up a bit.  
  
"Nonsense. It's good for the body, sweat out those toxins," chirped Sprout. Hermione smiled at them at looked around. Minerva was wearing a breezy, light green plaid sundress, Sprout was wearing a yellow floral print sun cloak, Hooch was wearing a sleeveless sundress with little Quidditch players flying around, and Madam Pomfrey was wearing a red skirt and blouse sitting under her umbrella, fanning herself. Lenea Vector had also joined them and was stretched out on a lounge chair wearing a pale pink number and sunning herself. Hermione looked at Vector's tanned skin and then at her own. It seemed even whiter when compared to the clothes she was wearing. She had picked a white flowy dress that came to the middle of her shins. The sleeves were loose and just covered the tops of her shoulders, and the waist was fastened with a simple black belt. She held her arms out in front of her and noticed they were getting a little pink.  
  
"Do you need some lotion, Hermione?" asked Poppy. "We fair-skinned gals must be prepared," and she tossed Hermione a little tube of cream. Hermione spread some of the jasmine-scented sun block out into her palms and rubbed it on her arms and face, before tossing it back to the medi-witch.  
  
"Well Minerva, what is Albus up to this afternoon?" asked Lenea drowsily.  
  
The older witch had been twirling circles of multi-coloured sparks and smokes in the air and looked up. "Oh, I'm not quite sure to be honest." The other women looked at her. McGonagall pursed her lips and now began swirling lewd images in the air. "He's gone to London for something." The women all giggled.  
  
"London...oh that sounds lovely. When was the last time we went shopping?"  
  
Minerva looked at Cerelia, "At least a month. We're due." Sprout giggled while filling up her glass.  
  
"Well, then. We should schedule a trip into the city sometime soon. I need a couple of spare lab robes besides. I ruined a pair last week."  
  
"I saw an adorable new evening cloak on sale in Hippolyta's monthly paper just this morning," exclaimed Poppy.  
  
"Where would you wear something from Hippolyta's to? I have an evening gown from Hippolyta's I've had for two years now, and not once have I gotten to use it," said McGonagall dejectedly and dropped her wand in her lap sulkily.  
  
"Well," said Lenea from her lounger. "I know Hogsmeade is opening a new pub soon. I believe it would require attire from such a place as Hippolyta's Minerva."  
  
"Really? How soon?"  
  
"This week. On Friday."  
  
"Ooh," said the women.  
  
"How is it you've heard of it and the rest of us haven't?" Hermione was smiling at her professors' banter and covered her eyes from the sun, watching Lenea.  
  
"Well, it might be that I have a special invitation." Lenea lowered her stylish black sunglasses and looked at the women over the tops.  
  
"Liars go into the Ministry, Lenea," quipped Gamula.  
  
They all laughed, but continued to look on eagerly. Vector raised herself up on one elbow and smiled. "Have any of you heard of Jeffrey Welsley?" replied Lenea coyly.  
  
"The mayor of Hogsmeade's son? That Jeffrey Welsley?!" exclaimed Gamula.  
  
"He was student before he was the mayor's son, you know," said Sprout.  
  
Gam let out a low whistle. "What did you do to attract that kind of attention Ms. Vector?" Vector mock-glared at her while the other women laughed.  
  
"Well he was just a couple of years ahead of you if memory serves me right, wasn't he Lenea?"  
  
"Yes," said Lenea, sitting up properly now. "And a Ravenclaw," she winked. The women chuckled.  
  
"Gamula, how was your...er...evening, the other night?"  
  
The flying instructor sat back in her chair with a large grin on her face, "Eventful. Blissfully ignorant and eventful." Even Hermione burst out laughing, partly with shock though.  
  
"Well," replied Cerelia calmly, "I  
  
"I bet you are."  
  
"Pft."  
  
"I'd be too..."  
  
"Mm-hmm," came the responses all at once. Minerva's "situation" was never clear and people could only guess, but despite her status she was happy. Which is all they could ask for.  
  
There was a moment of contemplating silence when all sat back in their chairs and recliners.  
  
Then, "And yet, I wonder...." Lenea's soft voice broke through the quiet, and every head turned to Hermione.  
  
She had been sitting quietly; hands neatly folded in her lap, eyes staring but not focused on anything in particular. Her mind vaguely registered the odd sensation of being watched and she blinked looking around. They were all staring at her with various expressions of curiosity.  
  
"What?" she said anxiously.  
  
The women all stared a bit harder. Hermione sat up straighter.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Nevermind then," said Poppy sweetly, easing back in her chair. Hermione's brows were knit and she swallowed. The silence hung for maybe four or five more seconds before Gamula stated the obvious.  
  
"How's Severus?" The professor's snickered and waited for Hermione's flustered response.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Her face, she just knew, was bright red. "I haven't a clue, I've...been here." She averted her gaze downwards.  
  
"Oh come on, deary. It really is quite obvious." Hermione jerked her gaze back upwards to the Herbology Professor.  
  
"I'm sorry?"  
  
"You fancy each other!" blurted Gam. "Everybody knows it. So just say so. We're all in approval, there's nothing to hide." Minerva was calmly smiling at her former student.  
  
Hermione was squirming and fidgeting in her seat like a first year in detention.  
  
"She's right Hermione," said Lenea. Hermione's eyes widened and her mouth worked silently. She looked around her and saw there was absolutely nothing she could see that needed her attention, thus nowhere to hide.  
  
"Um," she swallowed again, "I think you're all— really just, confused. I mean, there's nothing...we're not.... We're both just trying to save Harry is all." Once again they all sat back in their chairs, smiling, while Hermione tried not to choke on the massive gulp of lemonade she just swallowed.  
  
A/N: I haven't given up on the fic I swear!! I won't either...it may just take me awhile to get through it. But I promise I'm not giving on up it (mainly for Innogen :). I had actually posted this chapter earlier on aff.net but I simply forgot out posting it here, which is completely terrible, I know, but that's what happened. Forgive me. And as always, thank you soo much for reviews, which are still wholly welcome; and thanks mucho to Lenea for her wonderful words of wisdom. 


	14. The Ebony God

**Disclaimer:**

Snape: "Darling, where are my trousers?"

Hermione: "We burned them last night."

Snape: "…Oh yes."

JK: looks up from newspaper, and stares

Snape: "Was that before or after the Hippogriff ride?"

Hermione: "After. Remember we had to let the poor beast rest-"

Snape: "-because we rode the bollocks off of him."

Hermione: "Yes."

Snape: Yes."

JK: glares viciously

Hermione: bites lip

Snape: "And they were burned because I-"

JK: "No!"

Snape: "Because I was-"

JK: "I said NO!"

Snape: "….I spent myself in them."

JK: blows up "I fcking said NO!"

Hermione: cracks up

Snape: smirk

Touchstone

Chapter fourteen

ByGin

The day after Snape had received the invitation to his mother's birthday celebration he had been feeling ill. His stomach felt weak and no amount of medicine seemed to help. He'd found all sorts of odd jobs to entertain his mind with including re-arranging his entire stock of potions and ingredients, casting Spells to clean all the utensils, and even hand washing and polishing his personal cauldrons. He'd gone over his Herbal planner to remind himself when certain plants needed to be harvested and which ones needed to be boiled or jarred or set outside to soak in the Moon's silver light. He was doing anything to keep his mind from the eminent meeting. It had been years since he'd seen his parents, let alone be in the same room with the entire family together at the same time. He was dreading it. There was no other word for it. This was one of the reasons why he sat in his huge leather chair one night, staring into the cold grate of the fireplace, listening to Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata."

The fingers of his right hand mimicked the keys of the piano notes to the Sonata, while his left hand firmly held onto a glass of Ogden's Old Firewhiskey. He bobbed his head in time with his right hand as if he were sitting at a piano playing the melody.

"I don't want to go," he said to the empty fireplace and took another healthy swig of the whiskey. The alcohol had won the battle that night.

"Then don't," he answered for the fireplace.

"But if I don't, they'll complain, and once s'again I'll be the bad guy," Snape slurred. The fireplace remained silent.

"You're weak." Snape straightened in his seat, spilling a little of the amber liquid out of the glass and glared.

"Say that again," his deep voice purred dangerously.

"I said you're weak."

Snape stood up drunkenly. "You know, I'm relatively good at keeping my temperr, but I'mapt to leddit go tonight."

He took a menacing step towards the inanimate fireplace. "You're all talk, Snape."

"Talk! You think so? I've done things that would probally make yer…stones curl!" Now he was waving his arms around sloshing all the whiskey out of the glass and onto the stone floor. He took more heavy steps towards the hearth. "I've done things that any right person would, _should_, kill th'mselves over. All talk…" and he downed the remaining drops before throwing the glass at the fireplace. It shattered satisfyingly in the grate and Snape smirked.

"Oh bollocks, you're just a fireplace anyway…"

He clumsily returned to his chair and the Ogden's bottle when the sonata ended. Snape dropped to his chair and flicked his hand, starting the song over. He really loved that song. He began wondering about past lives and that if he were anyone it would have been Beethoven, when a timid knock sounded at his front door.

"No v'sitors," he slurred in the doorway's general direction. The knock sounded again, a bit more forcefully.

Snape growled and repeated, "No. _Visitors_." This time the knocking became louder and Snape winced and hauled his drunken arse out of the chair to walk as gracefully to the front entrance as he could.

When he repaired the broken vase on the polished wood entry table he fiercely unlocked the doors and glared at whoever was standing there.

"What the bloody hell do you want!" he said without really looking. "I thought I sai-"

"Nice to see you too, Severus." Hermione stood with her arms folded in front of him. He blinked and scowled at her before mimicking her stance, but leaning more against the doorjamb.

"Yes?" his honeyed voice replied.

Hermione noticed the definite smell of liquor and took a step back. "I couldn't sleep."

Indeed, Severus noticed she was wearing pyjamas beneath that red robe. His poor intoxicated mind was working furiously, trying to figure out exactly what that meant and he knit his brows, confused.

"I'm sorry?" He was desperately trying to sober himself.

"I said I couldn't sleep."

He stood there for a moment, then licked his lips cautiously. "And?"

Hermione fidgeted with her foot against a prominent stone on the floor to release some of her nervous energy. "I was just wondering if you'd come up with another way to try that solution we made for Harry. I've been thinking about it all day, and since I hadn't seen much of you today I was wondering if you'd had any other thoughts on how we should approach it." She shifted her stance and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

Snape stared at it, confused again. "No."

Hermione suddenly felt very inadequate standing out in the darkened corridor. She inhaled and waited for him to finish his sentence. But when it was apparent that was all he was going to say she opened her mouth to respond.

"No," began Snape instead. "I have not, Miss Granger." He stared at her parted lips. "I do have other things to take care of you realise."

She watched him for a moment and shifted hips, nervously. "Oh. Well I know that, I'm sorry. I just thought we would- but never mind. I'm sorry, I'll let you go back to…doing whatever you were doing."

"Yes." Snape cocked his head slightly.

"Excuse me?" she asked, confused.

"Yes, thank you." He flashed a forced grin and straightened up. Hermione looked confused but shook her head, when the music in his rooms changed from the "Moonlight" to "Piano Concerto No. 5."

"Is that, Beethoven playing in your rooms?" Hermione leaned forward to see behind him into his chambers. Snape swallowed the lump in his throat as a tantalising peek of flesh from her chest appeared behind the robe when she leant forwards.

"Yes. I was doing some thinking, and he's good for that." He pressed his dry tongue to the roof of his mouth, trying to dampen it.

"Really? 'Emperor' is one of my favourites by him. When I was a child, Mum," she swallowed at the memory, "enrolled me in piano lessons. And I would go upstairs to my room and play it on my stereo, thinking I could one day play as good as that." She smiled sadly. Snape just watched her quietly. "I've given piano up. I suppose it's been a good few years' now. I do miss it though. Do you play?"

Snape's head snapped up at the question and he regarded her thoughtfully. "A little. I barely have time for such things anymore. What with lesson planning, meetings…the many detentions…more meetings…." He sighed at his obviously un-interesting life.

The music went silent for a moment before starting up again with a quiet piano. Hermione smiled at him. "Are you sure you're alright tonight?" Snape had been staring peacefully at the gape in her robe again, before shaking his head at yet another question.

"What? Yes." He scowled. "Is there anything else you wanted?" His voice became harsher and she folded her arms again. Snape knew it to be an unconscious result of her defending herself. Learning to read body language had been crucial to him during his days as an active Death Eater. He backed off a bit. She looked at him a little hurt. "It's been a long day," he said for an excuse.

"Yes," she sighed. "The past week has been a little trying." The piano went silent again for a moment after the furious keying, and Hermione looked at the floor. "Well, I suppose I'll leave you alone. We can continue tomorrow if you'd like." She looked up into his dark eyes, which were beginning to look sleepy, and she privately noted how almost "cute" he looked when he was drowsy.

The music started up loud and hurried with an orchestra accompanying the Coda, and Snape cleared his throat and looked back to her face.

"Very well. Goodnight, Miss Granger." She smiled, shaking her head, and turned to go back up to her rooms, when Snape stopped and called out to her.

"Hermione?"

She stopped and turned around to look at him. "Yes?"

"I was wondering…say if this is a bad- obviously you don't have to, but if it-" he growled, and she cocked her head a little to the side. "Oh, never mind. Goodnight," and he hastily shut his door.

She stood out in the chilly dungeons perplexed, before shrugging and, grinning to herself, walked up the stairs to her rooms in Gryffindor Tower.

Snape stalked back to his chair, the whiskey and the silent fireplace. He glared at it while the "Ode to Joy" began with its deep, powerful cellos.

"What do you know," he smirked at the fireplace and placed the cork back in the Ogden's bottle and stopped the music. He turned towards his bedroom chambers before saying, "I'll ask her tomorrow then." He extinguished the sconces on the wall and flopped onto his bed. In the dark the sounds of sheets ruffling, him grunting and a final, "Damnit!" and Severus spelled his clothes off and eventually fell into another uneasy sleep.

After breakfast the next morning, Hermione was back in Severus' labs researching his books for any potions that might be used to strengthen the batch they had made for Harry. She really was making quite a mess in his lab, but it was nothing a few simple Cleaning Spells couldn't fix in a jiffy. She had just stumbled upon an intensifying tonic, which involved Camphor, and looked as if it would be compatible, when his heavy lab door burst open.

He stopped dead in his tracks and glared at her. She stood up straight and looked at him surprised. "Something wrong?" she asked.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded.

"Well, I was working on the potion," she said watching him carefully.

"Well, if you wouldn't mind, I need this space, _alone_, today. So if you could just leave, that would very be helpful." He strode fully into his lab and looked around. "What the bloody hell did you do to my lab?"

Hermione inhaled angrily. She dog-eared the Camphor essence page and slammed the book shut. "A simple 'hello' would have sufficed. And there's no reason to yell at me," she said in a clipped tone.

"I worked all day putting this lab to rights yesterday and it took you all of, what, ten minutes to destroy it today?" he fired back.

"It's not like it can't be fixed!" She impatiently waved her wand and set the Cleaning Spells to work.

"No, no. Never mind now!" He strode over to his workbench. "It's just, I need to get to work." He bent over, avoiding her angry glare, and spread out a piece of parchment in front of him. He was breathing very heavily and Hermione noticed his usually steady hands were shaking. Despite her swelling anger at being so rudely accosted, she steeled herself and watched him for a moment.

"What's wrong?" she asked not too politely.

"It's none of your concern—please leave."

Hermione looked at the parchment before him; it was written in an acid green ink and for some reason this raised alarms in her mind."What is that?"

He whirled on her. "It's nothing! Why are you still here? Surely there is someone else in this bloody castle you can bother?" And with that he flicked his wrist at the parchment causing it to promptly erupt into flame.

Hermione groaned and threw up her arms yelling, "You're impossible!" She stormed out of his lab and made for the library. Severus winced at the slammed door and raked his trembling hands through his damp hair. His conscience really bothered him for doing that to her, but he didn't have much time to waste. Feelings couldn't be spared at the moment. His moral excuse resolved, he turned back to his countertop and set to work.

Hermione spent half the day either pacing in the library muttering angrily, which drew attention from the House ghosts (who came in frequently to see what all the fuss was about), researching the traits of Camphor essences, writing letters to the Weasley's and eating chocolate. Minerva had come in looking for a book on Ancient Transfiguration Rites and tried to calm Hermione by saying, "He sometimes does that." This of course, didn't help. Eventually she got basically over it, and chalked it up to something that was on that parchment Severus had burned. She even began wondering if she should see if he was okay. Even though she was mad at him, she was also worried.

When she finally left the library, just before evening, and went out into the hall to go up to her rooms to change for dinner, she met him coming up from the dungeons. He stared straight ahead while she waited for him to pass by. When he got to the great front doors he hesitated for a moment, then opened them and went on to wherever he was going. She groaned again and stalked up to her rooms.

He was late for dinner that night, and most people had almost finished eating when he finally sat down. Hermione chewed the last bit of her Bangers and Mash and watched him out of the corner of her eye. He had sat down with a sigh, and poured himself a glass of pumpkin juice. Poppy nudged Minerva worriedly—he never drank pumpkin juice unless he was really upset. He had done that ever since he was a child.

Dumbledore noted the tension that was slowly gathering and decided to make friendly conversation directed towards a completely safe topic—such as the new pub opening that weekend in Hogsmeade. Of course the women all gushed and gossiped, and Hagrid began telling everyone how grand it was going to be because he had been in to watch the construction. Hermione politely listened and watched Snape secretly as he ate meagrely. He did not add to the dialogue.

Hermione turned from the chatting professors to look at Severus. She noticed his hands had some red patches on them, which appeared to be covered in a light salve. He was pushing his mashed potatoes around on his plate and ground his teeth, annoyed, and looked up at her blankly. She kept her face vacant as well and waited him out. He frowned and looked away. She sighed and slightly shook her head before going back to the rest of the conversation that was further down the table.

Once everyone had finished with dessert and coffee and began clearing out, Severus rose and walked out of the Great Hall. Hermione hurried to quietly catch up with him and caught him just before he headed back down to the dungeons. She had gotten over her initial anger and was just plain worried about him now. She called out his name and he stopped as if irritated, but waited for her. She came up beside him and looked into his eyes. He averted them and began walking down the stone steps into the darkness of the lower levels of the castle, leaving her to follow.

"Are you still working down there?" she asked a little out of breath.

"I've done all I can for the moment," he said further up ahead.

"Oh." She walked quickly behind him to keep up with his fast pace and couldn't help feeling that she must be completely annoying to follow him around like this all the time. He stopped at his lab door and abruptly turned to her. She gasped in surprise at the quick movement.

"Do you still need the lab?" he asked monotonously.

"I would like to. If it's okay with you, of course. I'm sorry if I've been a bother to you. I'm sure you're not used to having someone invade your privacy like this." She hoped this relent would help ease his temper a bit, but she was being sincere as well.

He didn't say anything, just contemplated her for a moment and unlocked the wards to his lab. He walked in, her right behind him, and then stopped. She ran into his back. She cursed herself when she got slightly turned on from the contact.

"These," he said indicating the three cauldrons each with a green haze around them, "are off limits, please."

"Are those-"

"Potion protectants, yes."

She nodded, intrigued. "Aright," she walked over to the book she had been looking in earlier that afternoon before he had yelled at her, and opened it up to the page she had been looking at. "I've been researching this ingredient all afternoon, and I wanted to consult you about it's usage in amping up our potion. What do you think?"

Snape walked over to the book and took it from her, looking over the page. "The idea is catching, but Camphor can be very unstable, and there are different strengths. You'd have to have a-"

"Stabilizer, yes. And lots of water, but if you could stabilize it, couldn't it be possible to create a stronger potion with the Camphor that has the Moonflower herb in it?" Snape studied her face for a moment before focusing his attention on the page. Hermione went to his supply closet and grabbed some of the necessary ingredients and laid them out on the workspace in front of her. She then went to the cooling box to retrieve some of the failed potion they had saved for future use. She ladled some of the liquid into a separate cauldron and began heating it slowly for experimentation, after she put the rest back in the cooler. Snape had watched her cautiously after having read the page. His mind was trying to work out any flaws or problems they could have.

"Hermione, I'm not sure if this will work."

She stopped stirring the thick liquid in the cauldron. "Why not?" She had been thinking about it all day. "I really think we could have a shot at this."

"Well for one, I'm not sure how the Camphor will react with the grated Dragon heartstring. I'm sure you know how delicate that is when mixing it with other spirits." His voice was becoming stern again, just like his classroom voice.

Hermione stiffened. "But if we do it with the proper dosages, it shouldn't react badly." She set her tone as well.

"I really think we should test this before we put it into the entire cauldron-full." He was getting testy. Hermione lay out a few varying strengths of Camphor oil, and added some water to the concoction.

"I think we should go with the medium strength," not listening to him. "It will produce something more powerful, but shouldn't be too extreme."

"Hermione, I'm serious-" he took a step towards the counter.

She slammed a stir stick down on the counter. "Is it a trust issue?" she yelled.

He stopped midstep. "….Excuse me?" he asked completely surprised.

"Yes! Can you not, for once, just let someone else lead or trust them to know what they're talking about? I'm not stupid, you know."

He stood there completely silent, eyes wide.

Finally, "Of all the ridiculous, impertinent…_womanly_ things to say! I take my work very seriously, particularly those working under me and their health. Not to mention my own! Forgive me if I have my doubts as to the stability of what you are about to do. There is a reason why I am a Potions _Master_." He pressed his lips together into a tight line and struggled to say no more. Hermione just shook her head, unbelievably, and reached over for the bottle of Camphor oil.

Snape looked cautiously at the bottle in her hands, and took a hesitant step forward, forgetting his anger.

"I wouldn't if-"

"Oh? Well I would! You know, I _am_ capable of doing something without your help!" she yelled. Hermione absent-mindedly thought it felt good to yell. Specifically at him.

She pulled out the stop and got ready to drip it into the now viciously bubbling cauldron under her hand.

Snape took another quick step towards her and made to grab her wrist.

"Hermione, really, don't-" She did.

She dripped three small drops into the cauldron, when she saw his eyes widen before he dove at her.

She squeaked as he rammed into her side, and the cauldron spat out its searing hot contents into the air directly where she had been standing. They fell harshly into a heap on the hard stone floor and felt shards of glass that had been containing the Camphor essence after it had shattered noisily on the ground next to their heads, sprinkle softly over their skin. Hot droplets of ruined potion rained on them until they were coated in the thick green liquid.

Hermione's heart froze while her face reddened. Snape was breathing heavily beside her and she could almost feel his anger radiating out of him onto her. The exhaled air from his mouth in her ear for once wasn't pleasant.

"I told you not to do that." His calm, slow voice was dripping with venom…and something akin to fear. "Why-"

Hermione shoved him off of her and stood up, slipping in the thick liquid beneath her feet. She grabbed onto the slippery work table to steady herself. Out of the corner of her eye saw the cauldron was smoking and simmering angrily next to her.

He quickly spun around on his knees on the floor and glared up at her, covered in goo. He noticed she was fighting back tears.

"You know, your temper really is a hazard to people's health, you should watch that!" he yelled at her.

She barely flinched, and straightened; some of the goo dripped off of her chin and plopped onto the floor. "Well you should watch yours! You don't help to make the most hospitable of working conditions, which, consequently, can be dangerous too! If you hadn't have been yelling at me-"

"Me! Oh, I don't think I was the only culprit in this, and if you would grow up and _think_ before you act-" he started to stand up, but also slipped in the gooey liquid that coated the floor.

"Grow up? _Me _grow up" she narrowed her eyes. "_You_ should talk about maturity, Severus Snape!" she spat and turned on her heels blinking the salted tears out of her eyes and strode awkwardly towards the door. She cursed any and everything she could think of when she stumbled in the muck again before reaching the clean stone hallway out of the lab and slammed the door shut behind her.

Snape winced when the door slammed, and stood up. He slipped again and slammed his fist into the worktable. He was still breathing hard from a mixture of anger, panic and frustration.

Looking around his lab and back at the door, he thanked Heaven that at least his cauldrons hadn't been ruined. He started to run his fingers through his goo-matted hair, stopped and sighed, immediately pulling them out of his thoroughly drenched black strands.

"_Damnit_!" he bellowed, and picked up a ladle. It slipped out of his slimy grip and he yelled as loud as he could before sending the cauldron hurtling into the nearest wall.

Crookshanks hissed and bolted under the chair he had been occupying in the next room.

Hermione cried while she was taking her shower immediately after getting to her rooms. And she continued crying whilst lying in bed afterwards. She was so angry at him, and at herself and how childish she had been. She could have potentially harmed them, but she was so eager to prove him wrong that she had acted before thinking. Something she just did not do.

Her emotions were a complete wreck. She thought he simply pitied her, but now she wasn't sure. She couldn't stop thinking about him, yet she was tired of thinking about him at the same time. And to top it all off, her own pet spent most of his time down there with him instead of her.

Tears leaked out of her eyes again, and she hugged her pillow tightly. "Even my cat likes him better than me!" she wailed. Hermione buried her face into her pillow and sobbed until she had cried herself to sleep hoping that when she woke up the next morning it would be in Heaven instead of in bed.

Snape finished showering and wrapped his waist with a plush, deep green towel and padded out of the bathroom. Crookshanks sat contentedly in the wingback next to the hearth in his room, watching him through half-closed eyes. Snape sank wearily onto his bed and looked at the cat.

"Your mistress is completely impossible." The animal blinked calmly. "She nearly got us killed today." The familiar stretched. Snape sighed. "Regardless…I can't stop thinking about her." Snape swore the cat smiled. "And I forgot to ask her today." The cat jumped down off the chair and clawed up onto the bed to settle on a pillow.

"Bloody nuisance," he threw the towel onto the floor. "Knox!"

Hermione woke up around mid-afternoon the next day. She felt a little ill, but nonetheless got dressed and went down for a late lunch. Knowing everyone had already eaten; she skipped the Great Hall and instead went down to the kitchens. She wondered if Dobby and Winky were still working at Hogwarts. Hermione brightened a little at the thought of seeing them. Besides, it would keep her mind occupied on something other than the terrible incidence that occurred last night.

As she made her way, quickly, down the steps that also led to the dungeons, she hung a sharp left and wound her way down the hall that the Hufflepuffs walked to their dorms. She grinned as she remembered coming down here with Harry and Ron to the kitchens for late night snacks. She'd come down here several times, alone, to talk to the elves about liberation as well. Only Dobby seemed to be excited at first. She'd hoped Dobby had finally gotten Winky to embrace freedom like he had. She knew they had fallen in love their seventh year, and had even had a couple of elvin children.

After tickling the pear on the huge painting of fruit that stood blocking the entrance to the kitchens, she stepped inside and smiled remembering the first time she'd been in there. Almost immediately she was greeted by dozens of House elves who doted on her and ran to fetch her tea, biscuits and anything else they could lay their tiny little hands on. Despite wanting to help the House elves, she had made her peace with trying to liberate them, knowing they would rather die serving than live being free, so she had stopped pestering them.

"MISS!" came a high pitched and very happy voice from somewhere near the floor. "Miss has come to see Dobby and his family! I was telling Winky, I was saying, 'Winky! Little Miss will come, she will.' And what has she done? She has come to see Dobby!" and the little House elf ran delightedly to her and hugged Hermione around the knees, crying tears of joy. Hermione laughed and bent down to give Dobby a kiss on the top of his knobbly little head. Dobby blushed and bowed deeply, before jumping up and down again.

"Oh Miss, I is so glad to see you. We was so worried about you, we was. Dobby and Winky came in every night to see that Professor Snapes was taking good care of you. He did too."

"Dobby! Stops pestering Miss Hermione." A very pregnant Winky emerged from around a corner, near the great pantry, followed by three little elf children tagging along behind. Hermione smiled even brighter. Elf children were so rare to see, and they were so adorable she could hardly stand it.

"Oh, Dobby!" she exclaimed. "Is this your family? I didn't realise you had so many children. And another on the way! Congratulations!" Again Dobby deeply blushed, and kicked the ground. Winky hobbled her way over, and tried as hard as she could to curtsy, not doing a very good job of it. Hermione had to try very hard not to laugh.

"We is very happy to be seeing you, Miss Hermione. Dobby is being right. We was very worried for Miss. But now you is better. Would Miss like Winky to introduce her childrens?" Hermione smiled and nodded. "This is the oldest; he is being the one you saw when he was just born." The tallest of the three boldly stepped forward, and took off his knit hat. It looked very familiar with its bobble on the head, and Hermione was sure she had given that to Dobby so many years before. Hermione curtsied to the boy elf.

"I is happy to see Miss Hermione again," said the elf child.

"Me too, Shasta." The little elf bowed and stepped back behind his mother.

"Miss, this is our next son, Corby." The middle elf child stepped nervously forward. His clothes was just as ridiculous as his father's, meaning absolutely nothing matched, whereas the other two were wearing clothes that matched, like their mother. He looked just like his father, only with his mother's squashed tomato nose, and his voice was very high pitched and squeaky.

This elf bowed the lowest, his squashed little nose touching the ground. "I is very pleased to meet you, Miss."

Hermione laughed. "As am I, Corby. You look very much like your father." Dobby's little chest swelled with pride.

"Much thanks to you Miss," said Corby. "Father has told us of Miss's great bravery." Hermione smiled. The little elf looked as if he wanted to ask her a question, but thought better of it, and then decided to ask anyways. "Begging your pardon, Miss, but Corby was wondering if the legend is true about Miss."

Hermione's eyes widened a bit in surprise. "Legend?"

"Corby! It is impolite to speak to Miss Hermione about such things," Winky scolded.

"Corby is wondering about Miss's attempt at," Dobby looked at his wife apologetically, then whispered, "About the _Liberation_," he said faintly. Winky shifted uneasily and looked around. The youngest of the elf children looked away too.

"Dobby," warned Winky. His ears drooped a bit. Hermione burst out laughing.

"Not at all, Corby. I hope your mother won't mind me saying this to you," and she glanced at Winky, who smoothed her little skirt out. "But yes, I did do…what your father said." And she winked at Corby. The little elf's already too big eyes bulged even more and he smiled, before running back to join his brother and sister.

Winky was getting tired, and placed her small hands on her back, the weight of her unborn baby making her legs ache. "This, Miss Hermione, is our youngest and so far only daughter. She is being named Hermy." At this Winky blushed. Hermione's eyes widened again. "Please Miss; we wanted, er, Dobby was wanting to name his daughter after the bravest, kindest witch Dobby is knowing."

Hermione opened her mouth in astonishment. "Oh! Dobby! Winky! That is so…that is such a compliment, thank you so very much." This time Hermione was the one to blush.

Winky urged a very shy, but proud little girl elf out from behind her. The little elf had big brown eyes, and looked very much like her mother, but even cuter. She wore a tiny little Hogwarts skirt and blouse, with a very tiny Gryffindor emblem sewn onto the chest.

"Hermy is a favourite of Master Dumbledore, and he is giving Hermy these clothes for Hermy's birthday this year," replied an ecstatic Dobby. Hermy curtsied as best she could and batted her large eyelashes and Hermione, to which Hermione curtsied back.

"It is an honour to meet you as well, Hermy." The little elf blushed and giggled. She didn't look much older than maybe three years of age.

Finally, Winky could wait no longer. She went over to a nearby stool and sat down on it carefully, with a sigh. Dobby went to stand beside his wife.

"Are you okay, my Winky?"

"Dobby, I is fine. See to Miss Hermione," she said tiredly. At this the three elf children ran up to Hermione.

"Can we gets you anything, Miss? We have all kinds of puddings!" Hermione felt odd about having the children get her something, but she knew they'd go with whomever she asked. So she asked for a chicken salad, sandwich and some pumpkin juice, and the three went bounding away, laughing and tackling each other.

Winky winced. "They still has lots to learn, but they are smart." Dobby nodded and his ears flapped around his face, but he was beaming at his children.

After lunch Hermione said her goodbyes to Dobby's wonderful family (the children promising to visit as often as they could get away from their mother). When she reached the top of the stairs and out into the main entrance, Hermione decided a walk outside in the fresh air would do her some good. She used to run everyday, but had been either sick, or too busy to start up again.

She was wearing some khaki shorts, and a simple t-shirt already, so she thought she might see if she was still in any kind of shape. She went out onto the steps that lead up the front doors of the castle, and stretched before starting out. She took off down the path towards the gates at a light pace, enjoying the workout. She hoped she could maybe even run off some of last night's embarrassment.

The hot sun felt good on her skin and her calves felt great at being used properly again. When she reached the gates, she took a short breather before taking back off up the gravel path towards the front doors again. As she approached the entrance, Vector came out and waved to her. When she got nearer, she called out to her.

"I thought that was you I saw running," Lenea smiled down at Hermione. She was panting heavily and only nodded, smiling.

"Yes," she breathed, "I'm a bit…out of…shape..."

Vector laughed. "Well, if that's what being out of shape is, I hope I am too," she smiled at the Gryffindor. "I was hoping you still had enough in you to accompany me for a walk? I've been cooped up in my office all day, redoing my syllabi and so forth. I could use a little sun."

Hermione nodded, having finally caught her breath, replied, "I'd love to." They set off to the west of the castle talking lightly and trying to make the best of the heat, each enjoying the other's company.

Snape had woken up in a foul mood that morning and was still angry with Hermione. He was also angry with himself and hadn't slept well at all. When he'd gone up for lunch, having skipped breakfast, he'd gotten sly glances from the women present. Snape stared at everyone curiously, before scowling and taking a water cress sandwich from the pewter tray in front of him. However, once Hermione hadn't shown up, (this being the initial reason for the queer looks from faculty, Snape surmised) everyone left him alone. Everyone except Madam Hooch.

"Sleep in late, eh Snape?" she taunted.

"Madam, I am in no mood for your games today." He almost said he'd had a "rough night," but then he would have screwed himself over, so he left it at that. Instead he settled for eating his lunch quietly.

The Flying Instructor of course didn't stop. "Well, that's too bad. I needed some help this afternoon, and a good opinion, as you are the only other person here qualified to have a sort of opinion about the state of our Quidditch gear."

At this Snape relaxed a bit and barely turned to acknowledge the woman. "Go on," his deep voice inquired.

"Well, obviously, the uniforms are in a terrible state, and the school-issued brooms, well, technically should be burnt." Snape smirked. "Albus says that we've been receiving some extra donations now that the war is over, and people have been unafraid to help Hogwarts." She took a sip of her lemonade. "So I was wondering if you'd like to exorcise your demons and help me clean out the locker rooms." She sat back in her chair and waited for Severus to finish his last bite. He wiped his mouth and sat back in his own chair. He hadn't been down to the pitch in awhile, and it would take his mind off of…well, everything. Hopefully.

"Very well, Gamula. When would you like-"

"As soon as you're finished, if you please." She stood up, said her goodbye's to the rest of the faculty and left the High Table. On her way past she called out saucily, "See you on field, Snape!" He shook his head and poured himself another glass of water. When he'd eaten all he wanted, he left the Hall again, and went back down to his rooms to change clothes. His current attire wasn't conducive to being out in the hot locker rooms in the middle of summer. He switched into a pair of breezy, black trousers, and a simple black, cotton short sleeved shirt. In the back of his wardrobe he noticed his flying robes out of the corner of his eye, and he began toying with the idea of taking them along, just in case. Hooch was always fun to race, and he couldn't think of a moment when he'd been at the pitch with her during similar occurrences and she hadn't taken him on. The robes were very expensive, but tough. They were of course black, but had white referee stripes on the inside lining, as well as a few on the outside back. They weren't made for speed, as there were several pieces that were not sewn together, but when viewed from below, the wind racing through and flapping the fabric loosely behind, it made quite an appearance.

Finally he decided it would be a little too hot, and wouldn't do for racing in. He stayed, instead, in his shirt and trousers. He next went to another, smaller, wardrobe near the back wall of his room. The cabinet was made of ebony and had been highly polished. He ran his hands along the smooth, silver handles and opened them up. Snape knew he wasn't a terribly athletic person, he never really had been. But he wasn't dreadful either. If he'd been given a chance when he was younger, he felt sure he could have excelled at Quidditch. But, he had instead been pressured, mainly by himself if he were being honest, to choose books over frivolity as a child. Thus, he merely flew when it was the only other option left for leisure.

However, this did not stop him from buying a Quidditch rack and having the most expensive broom money could buy. This being the new Quicksilver. Not to mention owning a rather attractive set of flying robes, which almost nobody knew about.

Today, he only brought the broom. When he stepped outside and the bright sunshine hit his face, Snape deeply inhaled the summer air. He slung his broom, carefully, over his shoulder and started off with a brisk pace down to the Quidditch pitch. He was rather excited to have the feel of the broom in his hands, the power under him. It had been such a long time since he'd flown; it was like opening a new present. When he was a child, that is. He didn't get so excited about such things now, his mind at least tried to insist.

As he got closer to the locker rooms Hooch heard him and called out from inside, "It's about time Snape! You didn't put on that hot little-" she looked up. "Oh. You didn't, pity." But upon closer examination she said, "However, that will definitely work." Snape grinned and shook his head. "A grin? For me?" she batted her eyelashes. She could be coy, she was a rather tougher woman, but she could be bashful. Or at least pretend to be.

"Were you ever called a harlot, in school, Gam?" he tossed out.

She burst out into a throaty cackle and threw a battered Cleansweep in his direction. "Oh, Severus. You're such a tease."

"Do watch the Quicksilver, please."

Gam turned back around. "So, you did bring the old Ebony god. Excellent," she said eyeing the black streamlined broom. "Because I am going to thoroughly stomp you into the ground, potion boy."

"You can try, Madam." He gently laid his broom on the bench nearest him, and began going through old equipment, and uniforms with his fellow Slytherin.

After about 30 minutes of consolidation, they shrunk and boxed the old equipment to be sent back to the manufacturers. They stepped out into the fresh air and stretched a bit.

"Thank goodness that's over with. I hate throwing away old brooms almost as much as I love buying new ones," sighed the Flying Instructor.

"Yes, did you bring along that new broom of yours?"

The Slytherin flashed a happy grin. "Of course. You know, my favourite line was the Silver Arrows, back when I was a kid. Well, the old company produced a new version and I had to get it. Allow me to introduce," she went in to go get the broom and came back out, "the newest addition to the Silver Arrow family. The Silver Arrow….5000!" They both laughed.

"Is _that_ what they're calling it? How original," Snape smirked and lightly took it from her hands, looking it over. "Well, it nice, it's much thinner than the old," he observed.

"Look at the tail, though. Same streamlined twigs, just longer. They always had such balance, even for their time."

"Mm, well now that that is settled. I challenge you to a race." Snape went in for his own broom and met her on the pitch.

"What's the course?" asked Gamula with delight.

Snape looked about. "One lap around the lake, the part that is on the grounds, then come back to the stadium, two around, vertical figure eight, touch both middle goal posts, and back to the centre."

"I accept your challenge Professor Snape! May the best win to taunt the loser afterwards."

He smiled, feeling the adrenaline begin coursing through his body. He mounted his Quicksilver excitedly. The broom seemed to be humming with excitement and he stroked the smooth, polished wood in his hands before they both kicked off into the air, awaiting his call.

"On three, Madam," he shouted. She saluted, and assumed her racing position.

"One! Two!" he paused for a moment. "Three!" And off they shot! They both went quickly up into the air, over the stadium walls and raced over to the lake. They turned into a smooth curve, Hooch slightly ahead, and followed the shoreline, weaving in and out of the tall trees. Snape ever so slightly dipped downwards to skim the top of the lake with his hands. The water looked and felt beautiful. Snape was relishing the exhilarating feeling of his hair flapping behind him as the wind whipped in his pale face. Temporary bliss. He could hear the Flying Instructor laughing up ahead of him, and he darted upwards, losing a little time, but leant forward and gripped tightly as his broom responded in speed. He quickly caught up with her and stayed at her side for a moment.

"You're going to lose!" he shouted. And she shook her head, pushing forwards. The bend in the lake was coming up, and they both sharply turned to follow the shoreline back towards the centre of the grounds. Severus looked down and noticed two figures going down to the field. He saw the long brown hair of one, and the short, blonde of the other. _'Lovely,'_ he thought and pushed forwards harder.

From back on the ground, Hermione and Vector saw the two black figures racing in the sky above the lake.

"Look, Hermione! It's Gamula and Severus!" Vector laughed. "I haven't seen them race in quite awhile."

Hermione looked shocked. "Severus races? Since when!" She looked up smiling in complete disbelief. She would have never figured Severus Snape a flier.

"Yes, when Hooch is not well, or absent, Severus is licensed to referee Quidditch matches. He's done so several times. Although he is rather partial, but basically he's fair." Hermione had a sudden memory of him being the referee at one of their first games.

The two Slytherins raced overhead turning towards the Quidditch pitch, and Vector and Hermione who were almost to the field, looked at each other smiling, and ran the rest of the way down to the field to see the rest of the competition. They quickly sat down on the bleachers in front of the locker rooms and watched as Snape and Hooch went head to head around the top of the stadium.

"He's very good isn't he?" Lenea nodded, grinning. Snape was now ahead and raced for the centre of the field. He was getting too close to the ground, going full speed, which caused Hermione to scream and Lenea to gasp. But Severus jerked his arms up last minute, shooting upwards, followed by Hooch a few seconds later. He went into a wide, smooth arch to the right, then crossed over into a curve left, then circled on his side to the right, and curved downwards. The women were both clutching at their chests, mouths open, and their eyes wide. Hooch likewise followed him, doing just as beautifully.

Snape crossed over to his right to finish the swoop of the bottom part of the figure eight and effortlessly took off towards the left side of the field, toward the goals.

Vector stood up cheering for Hooch, "COME ON, GAMULA! DON'T LET THAT SERPENT BEAT YOU!" and laughed. Hermione followed suit.

"She's on your heels, Severus!" both women stood cheering them on and watching with bated breath.

Snape slowed at the goal, touched it with his hand, and darted off in the other direction.

"I'm still going to win!" he called out to Hooch. He got a fleeting image of her flipping him off before she touched the middle goal and turned. Snape shot across the field, smiling, slowed again to touch the other post a mere two seconds before Hooch. He shot off towards the centre of the pitch and could feel her at the end of his broom. Severus could see Hermione cheering for him in the stands and his heart swelled for a moment and he pushed forwards. He would win this time! They were neck and neck; the centre coming closer. Snape pulled up, grunting with force. He could hear Gamula doing the same behind him. He slowed to an almost halt and kicked the sand, sending it spraying in all directions with his foot, yelling out.

Hooch stopped a little past the centre where he had stopped and turned around.

"Very well! You won, you won! Out of how many times, though?" Hooch spat good-naturedly. She was, however, a little disappointed at having lost.

Snape was breathing heavily, smiling. Hermione and Vector went over to stand next to them.

"You mean Severus beat you, Gamula!" cried Lenea. Hermione was beaming.

"Congratulations, Severus," she said. "Madam Hooch, you did just as well." Hooch smiled in reply, and wiped a bead of perspiration from her brow. Hermione looked up at Severus, Vector had noticed him as well, but hadn't said anything. Hermione was just realising how extremely hot he looked. He was wearing black trousers, that hugged his hips very nicely, and his black shirt was stuck to his body, outlining the faint muscles in his chest. His hair was swept out of his face, wind blown, and sweat was dripping off his brow, and his eyes held a sort of happy mischief. Hermione's mouth went completely dry.

"That was quite a spectacle, Severus. I didn't realise you could pull such moves. For a Potions Master, that is," teased Lenea.

Severus lifted his chin. "And why not?"

"Because generally, your kind is such nerds, dear boy," replied Hooch.

Snape grinned. "Well, then a nerd just beat a Flying Instructor," his voice was purring against Hermione's nerves and she shifted on her feet. Lenea looked at her through the corner of her eye, and although she could stand to admire Severus at the moment, she knew now would be the perfect time to leave them alone.

"Speaking of nerd, I have very much enjoyed this afternoon, but I have to get back to my dark little office. I have a very rowdy bunch of third years coming up, and they need a seating chart. Hooch, picking up on the hint nodded.

"Yes, I'm a terrible loser, and I don't think I can take much more of his gloating, so I'll send those old brooms and whatnot off to order new ones. At least that will make me happy." The older women turned and left. Hooch stopped by the locker rooms and _Accio'd _the box of equipment. She then shouldered her broom and together she and Vector set off for the castle leaving Hermione and a sweating Snape alone.

They stood there for a moment, an awkward silence falling between them. Each one was trying to think of who should apologize to whom first.

There was a tense moment, mainly filled by the heavy breathing of Severus. "Sorry," "Forgive me," they both said at the same time. Hermione smiled, and Snape looked at the ground, shifting his weight to his other leg.

"I'm sorry for not listening to you yesterday," Hermione said bashfully. "You do know more than me in that field, and I was just…aggravated with you. I wasn't thinking, and I'm sorry I messed up your lab." She too looked at the ground.

"Apology accepted." They stood there for a bit, and Hermione waited for him to apologize, but when he didn't she began to get agitated again. He grinned at her devilishly and she understood he was just trying to get a raise out of her. She pushed him gently and he looked up at her.

"I shouldn't have lost my temper like that at you…both times. I'm sorry." Hermione smiled at him. They were both looking into each other's eyes completely happy to just be standing there. The urge to kiss her started to really overwhelm Snape, so he changed gears.

"Do you fly?" he said indicating his broom. This was a big deal; he didn't just let anyone fly on his baby.

Hermione took a step back. "Actually, that's the one thing I never did well at in school…I really can't fly," she blushed.

Snape raised his eyebrows. "You mean there is something you _can't_ do?" he asked incredulously. "Well, maybe it's time you learn."

Hermione took another step back and shook her head vigorously. "No, I mean it. I was always content to let Harry and Ron fly…but I am perfectly fine on the ground."

Snape looked at her appraisingly. "So you're afraid."

Hermione looked back. "No. I just don't like flying."

"What if I help you?" She stood there unmoved. "I'll ride behind you and show you how it's done," he purred. Hermione looked at him blankly. "The broom of course," he added. Her eyes got wide and she opened her mouth trying to find something to say. He laughed. "It was a joke, Hermione. I understand if you're too scared to try something that simple children can do." He smirked at her.

"I know what you're trying to do, Severus," she said firmly.

"I doubt that," and he jumped back out of the reach of her slap.

"Maybe another time," she offered and began walking away. He stood there for a moment trying to think of a way to keep her with him longer. He got back on his broom and rode low to the ground, slowly beside her.

"So, what plans have you for this afternoon?"

Hermione shrugged. "The afternoon is almost over," she watched him flying beside her as they made their way to the castle. The giant squid poked a long tentacle out of the water lazily and swam near the surface.

"Oh! I haven't seen the squid in so long," she exclaimed. Snape looked over to the lake.

"Mm. Well, what are you doing this evening?" he asked looking back at her. They were passing through a patch of wildflowers near Hagrid's hut, and again Hermione shrugged.

"May I ask why?" she pursed her lips. Snape stared at them.

"I thought I might try to make amends?" He bent over and dropped his arm to just above the ground.

"How would you do that?" she asked coyly. He came back up and held out a fistful of wildflowers to her. Hermione stopped and looked at them. He stopped beside her, still hovering.

"A token of my gratitude?" Hermione smiled at him, but still didn't take them. "You're right, they're hideous," he said dryly and he began to throw them down when she stopped him.

"No! They're beautiful, I just…can't believe you did that is all," and she took them from his hands, smiling. "It seems very _un-Snapish_."

He studied her as she looked at the flowers. "It was." She grinned and shook her head. He smiled lightly at the jest. "Next would be an invitation for you to join me for dinner…somewhere out here. I'm not sure where yet, but it will be nice. That is, if you accept."

Hermione's eyes widened. She could not believe her ears. "Is…this a date, then?"

Snape breathed in, and looked up, thinking, toying with her. Then he looked back at her calmly. "I believe it is."

He got off the broom now and leaned against it, arms crossed. His muscles were showing past the sleeves of his shirt, and Hermione again felt that wave of desire just lightly spark up within her.

"Will you accept?" he asked softly.

Hermione swallowed. "What time?"

He grinned devilishly at her, and looked at her lips while she nervously worried them. "How about, eight o'clock?"

She tried to nod casually, but most likely failed. "Yes, I accept."

They stood there for another moment, Hermione fingering the petals of the flowers. Snape watched her hands, transfixed.  
"Good," he said quietly. "Shall I meet you in your rooms?"

"That would be fine," she said shyly. He nodded, still gazing at her lovely pink lips.

They began moving again, this time Snape shouldering his ebony broom, and walked up to the castle. Hermione asked more about his flying experience, which he answered, and when they reached the great staircase Snape gently grasped her hand and brought it to his lips. He kissed the soft skin on her knuckles, staring into her eyes, before saying goodbye. He turned from her and disappeared with his broom into the darkness of the dungeons. Hermione stood as if in a daze after he left. Then with a huge, silly grin, ran upstairs to prepare for her moonlit date that evening with the Potions Professor.

A/N: Hi there! Um. Enjoy.

And I'm back from England now.


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